waves

The deadliest creature known to womankind...

2010-05-02T14:53:00.004-04:00

The nature of many women, I have found, is to be inately afraid of the silliest things. We fear the icky, creepy little bugs that invade our homes and patios. I have seen women run for a tissue, JUST to gently grab the helpless insect and either flush it down the toilet, or release it outside. Ladies, please stop that. It is embarrassing. First of all, releasing it is just stupid. Do you think that it lost it's GPS system and won't find it's way back in? Then why do you pick it up, ever so gently, just to send it for a swirling ride from hell into out public sewer system that will surely end it's life? What is the WORLD did a helpless little ladybug do that warrants such an assault? Besides, the spider hiding under your bed will even the score for you, soon enough.

We fear snakes and small rodents. This is amazing. A woman will spend hours upon hours seeking out the best deal one can find on any purchase made for the home and family, but if she spies a rodent or a snake..BAM! She is on the phone faster than you can say, "CHARGE IT!". She will call one, and only one, animal control service and pay TOP DOLLAR to have this situation remedied. This same woman, who spends much of her time diligently protecting her family and searching child predator websites will allow a man sporting a mullet, one tooth, and a rusty trap, to enter her home and seek out all cracks and crevices within it JUST to remove one mouse.

Then, there is a knock at the door. Behind it lurks the deadliest creature known to womankind. Yet, she will open the door, smile, and say, "Oh hi, Mom. Come on in!" No, it isn't HER mother, it is the woman who gave birth to her significant other. Ladies, you are going to need a bigger tissue for THIS pest removal!

Now, I know that there are those of you out there that have a deliriously wonderful relationship with your mother-in-law, and to you, I say...shush. This is all about those of us who have endured years of emotional torment at the hands of a creature riddled with toxicity and venom.

Maybe some background is required here. I can help with that, as I am sure there are those who can relate on many levels to the tales I am about to share.

I was married at a fairly young age, I was twenty years old. I also had the privledge of marrying outside of my own culture and race. I married a Cantonese man whose family moved to The United States when he was only ten years old. You think that dealing with a woman who despises you is difficult? Try this one on for size, imagine that you do not speak the same language and have to rely on your husband for accurate translation. Yeah, exactly. I used to love the contorted, tortured expression on his face as he attempted to soften the blow that was just vommited all over me, via him. There was a culture and language barrier in place that made all of the usual dealings with in-laws even more of a challenge, I will admit that. However, when you scrape away all of the excuses and justifications for her behavior, you are left with a very simple and deadly creature...the meddling Mother-in-law.

When my future husband (also future EX husband) and I began dating, there were SO many warning signs that so many of us ignore. I remember meeting my future mother-in-law, and seeing that pursed mouth of hers, and thinking, "I am going to MAKE this woman like me." I didn't know how wrong I was. You see, my husband was her baby. He was the youngest of five children, and her pride and joy. The first time that we met, I was wearing a tank top, so my arms were fully exposed. She looked me up and down, grabbed my arm, and made a disgusted face. I am half Italian heritage. I have hair on my arms from my wrist to my elbow, as many women do. I never thought much of it, and refused to do anything about it, being as I already have enough body parts to scrape hair from. She said disgustedly, "Yuck! You a woman. You no have hair on the arm. Take off. You look like man." When I recovered from the shock and hurt of what she said, I wanted to say, "Your son doesn't seem to mind when he is lying next to me in bed, you bitch!" But, I didn't say that. Damn, i wish that I had. The years and moments to follow would only solidify in my mind that this woman was, indeed, the antichrist.

My Mother-in-law was good for calling "family meetings" to discuss whatever hair was up her ass that week. These were a real hoot. Basically, it was a bunch of babbling Chinese people, and me. I knew that if Uncle Johnny showed up, I was in some shit. He was the designated translator for the dumb white girl. This one particular meeting involved HER deciding that my husband and I should move. Oh, did I mention that the move would include moving in with THEM? It did. My father-in-law was in failing health, and she felt that it would be best for everyone if I became their nursemaid and slave. I disagreed. However, she did not go about this in the typical fashion. I sat through this entire dinner, held in a public venue, of course, and wondered what her angle was going to be. After we completed our meal and desserts, I was fully prepared to gather my two year old son, and return home. It was then that she decided to pull her rabbit from the hat. She asked Johnny to have me remain seated and pulled a jewelry box from her purse. Within that box was contained a 2 carat diamond solitaire. She placed it in her claw, I mean hand, and reached out to me with an expression of pure deviance. She asked Johnny to ask me if I liked the ring. I knew full well what this bitch was up to. I took the ring from Johnny, looked at it, and said, "It is a bit gaudy for my tastes, what do you want?" I then proceded to set the ring up on end and flick it back accross the table at her. It was the first of many times that I would lose my cool at the hand of such a manipulative creature. I had always been accused of being in their family for their money. Oh, you didn't know that they were wealthy? Oops, sorry about that. Let me back up a moment, and explain.

My mother and father-in-law brought their family here in the late eighties. They were seeking what all immigrants seek here, freedom and financial success. They were fairly poor, and had five children. They began washing dishes at her sister's restaurant to earn a paycheck. They worked long hours and their children were either worked as slaves, or severely neglected. A large part of the Chinese culture revolves around gambling. They are no exception. They would play Mah Jong for days straight, winning or losing thousands of dollars nightly. They frequented casinos and gaming resorts, all the while claiming poverty. They also played the Pennsylvania lottery. Here is where the story creates the monster that I came to know and loathe. My mother-in-law thought that she could "figure out" the lottery numbers before they hit. She did this daily. One particular day, she gave a list of numbers to her husband to play. He dutifully went to the local gas station to carry out the queen's orders. When he arrived, he realized that he had forgotten his reading glasses. The lottery tickets, in case you have never seen them, are VERY difficult to read and decipher if you have GOOD eyesight. There are little boxes by the numbers that you must fill in with pencil in order to choose the number. He could not see them. So, he counted the boxes over and filled in the block of what he THOUGHT was the right number. One problem arose. He was holding the card upside down. He had played all the wrong numbers, and to say that he heard about his mistake when he arrived home, would be an understatement. Fortunately, he was redeemed when a few days later, they were the recipients of 15.8 million dollars. You heard that right. 15.8 MILIION DOLLARS!

Now, one would think that this family would have all the opportunity that they had hoped for, correct? You would be wrong. Not ONE of their children experienced a college education. Not ONE of their children has remained married for more than 10 years. Not ONE of their children could stand alone without the financial support of their parents. You see, SHE wanted it that way. I remember once, her saying to me, "Have MORE kids. I have 5 kid. You, only 3! You need MORE. They care of you when they big." She remained in control of her children despite their yearning for freedom. They wanted her money, and she used it to it's fullest potential as a device to keep control.

She had one glitch in her plan. Me. I continually resisted her methods of control. I begged my husband to NOT take their money, and that we would get by on what we had. This was futile, he was addicted to it, and he loved his Mommy. This woman was the bane of my existance. She would often show up at our home unannounced and let herself in with the key that her son had provided to her. One particular incident will remain forever embedded in my memory. I was in the shower when her and her husband arrived. I came out of the shower and ran smack into my father-in-law standing in my bedroom, where SHE had told him to go. She suggested that I was lazy and sleeping and that he should wake me. Later, I found from my husband that she was upset with me for coming out of the shower wearing only a towel, and that she found it to be disrespectful of her husband. *blink* It was a crazy little world inside of her head, and GOD HELP YOU if you dared to enter it.

She would have moments of "kindness". Well, that was once she stopped spreading the rumor that my second son did not belong to my husband because he was "too white". What the hell am I? I swear that this woman saw me as some kind of breeding vessel that should bow down to her every need and request. Once, she was "kind" enough to allow me to keep my baby. Yeah, soak THAT one in for a minute. This same woman who demanded that I breed had once held a family meeting when I was pregnant with my first son and told me that I would ruin her son's life, and that I should have an abortion. Then she passed the salt.

All mother-in-laws have their tools for mass destruction, but this woman had the holy grail...the language barrier. They had lived here for twenty years, and yet, she was COMPLETELY incapable of getting an oil change without help from her son. Every single weekend was consumed with tasks to be carried out by us, on her behalf. She would call my husband, or just show up at the house, and whine endlessly about how she just can't seem to get the phrase, "oil change" out of her mouth. Amazingly enough, though, she never seemed to have trouble at the bank. Go figure. If I dared to schedule anything that would interfere with my husband completing his assigned tasks, god help me. I can also assure you, that if this woman had something to say to me, and there was NOT a translator handy, she found a way to say it.

My children were always a bone of contention in my dealings with the monster-in-law. She would do all of the typical things, like give them things to eat that they were not allowed to have. Oh, I don't mean candy. You will need further explanation, again. I breast fed my sons, and after she was kind enough to walk right up to me, grasp my breasts, and determine that I was not producing sufficient milk for them, she decided to supplement their diet. I would put my son down for a nap, and I had to watch her like a hawk when she would visit. She would enter his room, wake him, and feed him glucose water from a bottle. Yes ladies, she did. To say the least, this would turn me into a raging female tiger. This confrontation would, of course, be all my fault because she was just "trying to help". Listen lady, keep your hands off of my tits, AND off of my son, please! Is that really a difficult concept to grasp? Culture barrier, my ass. I don't see Asian women feeling up each other's milk laden breasts all that often. Ya know?

I could always count on her to medicate my children, as well. When I say medicate, I mean torture. My husband guilted me into visiting my in-laws in Hong Kong one summer when my first two children were very small. My oldest son was just over two, and my middle son was just one month old. We made the 24 hour flight to Hong Kong, at the queen of the damned's request. This would be the longest eight weeks of my life. You heard that right. I stayed there for eight weeks with the creature from the shit lagoon. Within hours of our arrival, she had begun her usual torture. My oldest son has eczema. I made the fatal error of attempting to shower. It is amazing that I sustained any human hygeine while dealing with this woman. She saw me taking a shower as the hen abandoning the nest, and leaving it open to the fox. I could hear my son screaming while I was bathing. I quickly jumped from the shower and grabbed a towel, (oh, she is going to be pissed again!) just to see her placing my son in a vat of black liquid that was pouring off steam. The wicked witch of the EAST was trying to make a Jonas stew or some shit. I grabbed my son and asked her what the hell she was doing. She tugged at him and said, "you not know what you doing. I fix him skin. This Chinese medicine. GO AWAY!" Oh My GOD, WOMAN! This takes meddling to a whole new level. She is trying to boil my son, and my husband is worried that I hurt her feelings? What the hell kind of parallel universe have I entered?

Ok, now listen to me. I know that you have all had to eat something awful that your mother-in-law cooked, but until you have been fed a black snake that she just killed with her bare hands and nailed to a tree in the front yard, I DO NOT want to hear about your mother-in-law's dry pork chops! Got it? The crazy bitch told me that it would help the pain in my knee. Maybe it does, maybe it doesn't. But I can tell you this, the taste of black snake is WAY worse than the pain in my knee. I really thought that my brother-in-law was kidding when he told me that she was going to make me eat it. I also DO NOT like to look my meal in the eye. Is it not enough that I had to help you hold the chicken when you cut it's head off, and boiled the smelly feathers out? NOW I have to have it's head staring at me from my plate? Are you kidding me? Who eats a chicken's head, really? Jesus Christ, I had to deal with a Chinese Granny from the Beverly Hilbillies...and you think YOU have a shitty mother-in-law?

Ok, ok, I may have gotten a bit off track here. I have to focus. This woman made every event, family function, or get together into a game of wits. She was damn good at it too. I will now share the final move in her game of chess. She and her husband decided, many years back, to open another restaurant for their older son. They had already done this twice, and both times met as failure and financial loss. When they asked ME what I thought they should name it, I said, "Strike Three". Hey, I thought it was funny. She did not. Her oldest son was, and still is, a complete waste of perfectly good human organs. He is utterly useless and one of the laziest people I have ever known. So, opening a business for him to run is PROBABLY not a good idea. But, hey, that is their problem, right? Not quite. I made my husband promise to NOT get us involved in ANY WAY in the financial dealings of this restaurant and his family. We had already been there, and done that. He promised. I will make a VERY long story as short as possible here. We had another "family meeting" following the signing of the financial documents involving this restaurant. I found, to my dismay and complete shock, that my husband had been coerced into placing our home as collateral for the over one million dollars in loans required to start up another doomed business. We were not the only ones affected by this stunt. There were other innocent family members also manipulated into this disaster. I literally took leave of my senses. I told that woman exactly what I had thought of her, and her behavior for all those years. I felt WONDERFUL. Now, I had to get my home out of this mess. As it turns out, the entire real estate deal was a scam, and through diligent research, all that was lost was 20,000 dollars of the bitch's money.

Are you exhausted yet? I am. But that, folks, is not the end. This occurred just a few weeks before Christmas. Christmas eve, I had my family and friends here, at my home. My in-laws were to arrive at 6pm. At 7pm, my father-in-law shows up, alone. He informs my husband that my mother-in-law will not be making an appearance unless I drive to her mother's home, and make a public apology for direspecting her in front of the family. Holy shit! I thought to myself, certainly NO ONE will go for this, especially my husband. Well, that is not quite how it panned out. My two sister-in-laws took me into the upstairs bedroom and explain that if I do NOT go, she will win. They explained that the family would view me as guilty, and as a coward. I was stunned. I agreed to go, but I retained one thought. If my husband lets me walk out that door, this marriage is over. I walked out the door. I left my entire family and all of my friends on Christmas and drove to his grandmother's home. I walked in, and a hush fell over the house. His mother was seated at the dining room table. I sat next to her and asked for her forgiveness. My skin crawled as she placed her hand between my face and hers, displaying the mother's ring that I had bought her just a year before. She refused to look at me, or accept my apology. Ok, bitch. Game on.

I informed my husband that I wanted a divorce. He, of course, refused. We lived together for two more years following this event. I was a stay at home mom with no money, and faced a fight against millions of dollars. It was a steep uphill battle. In the course of that war, my credit was destroyed by the man who claimed to love me, and with the help of his mother. I discovered that the very home that I lived in was NOT purchased by my husband, as I had previously been told, but it was gifted to him by guess who. That's right, the mother. She gave him implicit instructions that I would NEVER own that house. He agreed, and he did so while we were married and "in love". Well, thanks to much hard work, creating a career from nothing, and sheer determination, the day that the PA family courts ordered my husband to hand over the title to my home was the day that I said, "Checkmate, bitch". I ate thousands of dollars in debt that he had run up against the house, survived devastated credit, paid thousands of dollars in legal fees and kept food on the table for three young boys.

I look back on that part of my life now, and I wonder....

Could I have just taken her out with a tissue, and flushed her down the toilet?

Where the hell is the mullet guy with the rusty trap when you really need him?

Well, the tissue was my determination to do what was right for my sons, the toilet was the reality that their lottery payments are now over, and they are as broke as the day they came here.

The mullet guy with the trap? That is her own greed and hatred locked away in her cold, dead heart. She made the rusty trap, and now she lives in it...with all five of her children. By the way, do you think that they take care of her now?

Would you?

Which cup has the ball now? $50 to the winner...step right up!

2010-05-01T16:18:00.004-04:00

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100501/ap_on_re_eu/eu_church_abuse

VATICAN CITY – Pope Benedict XVI cracked down Saturday on the scandal-plagued Legionaries of Christ, announcing that a papal envoy would take over and reform the conservative order that has been discredited by revelations that its founder sexually abused seminarians and fathered at least one child.

Benedict also ordered a special commission to study the Legionaries constitutions and said a Vatican expert would investigate its lay arm, Regnum Christi.

Well, I don't know about you, but I can rest my head peacefully tonight knowing that they are doing an inside investigation of...um...hold on a minute. "A Vatican expert"? What is he an expert IN? I don't think that being well versed in the ritual and practice of the Catholic church qualifies him to investigate child molestation, especially if he believes in the verses that condone it. A papal envoy? They are sending a religious diplomat? Well, that will be helpful, thanks for that. What the hell do they need a diplomat for? Are they trying to come up with a trade agreement or treaty? Interesting because I would think that they would want a criminal investigator to look into something that could be SO damaging to such an elite and moral organization.

Excuse me, Benedict The Great, what the hell exactly IS a "special commission" in relation to the very organization that has beed tied to the current cover-up scandal? I am curious, who comprises this steadfast and legally responsible "commission"? I hate to show any "disrespect", but you don't know shit about right and wrong. What right do you have to investigate the wrong doings of your organization (that includes the little branches that feed the large tree, asshole) from within that very organization? Who the fuck do you think you are? god?

Oh, you do, don't you. "Heaven forbid" that you allow a non self interested party, oh, say CRIMINAL INVESTIGATORS, to do EXACTLY what they are trained to do, and that is to uncover information and evidence that is conclusive and unbiased. You want that information for yourselves, so that you can run it through a filter, created by you, fill in the holes with information trumped up by you, and find an "eligible scapegoat" to pin the entire mess on that will not reflect back on, say...YOU!

In the end, it was only in 2006 — a year into Pope Benedict XVI's papacy — that the Vatican ordered Maciel to lead a "reserved life of penance and prayer," making him a priest in name only.

The Vatican statement was remarkable in its tough denunciation of Maciel's crimes and deception, but it placed the blame almost entirely on him. It made no mention of any complicity on the part of Vatican officials who had held up Maciel as a model for the faithful.

But, maybe I am wrong. *blink*

The Vatican ordered an investigation into the order in 2009 after the Legionaries acknowledged that Maciel had fathered a daughter who is now in her 20s and lives in Spain. But it was only in March of this year that the Legionaries acknowledged that Maciel had also sexually abused seminarians and that two men are claiming to be his sons.

But, I doubt it. You know why?

He died in 2008 at age 87.

In case you missed that slight of hand, folks, the man in question, who was just recently dismissed from the church, died two years ago. He will never stand trial. He will never hear the suffering of his victims. He has no ability to defend himself against his accusers in a court of law. Most importantly, he cannot speak of what his "bosses" did or did not know of his actions. He is dead. One couldn't ask for a better scapegoat and token pacifier of the public than a dead guy, eh?

The Vatican said the system of power, obedience and silence Maciel created had kept "a large part" of the Legionaries in the dark about his double life. That did raise questions about what would become of the current Legionaries leadership since many have questioned how they couldn't have known of his misdeeds.

Pot, meet kettle. Let me get this right, and bear with me for a moment because my head is spinning at an alarming rate. The catholic church, who uses an obsolete and dead language to communicate, who refuses to speak directly to the people without a spokesman and publicist, who refuses to allow non religious investigations of the inner workings of their organization, who has managed to duck and dodge serious allegations of abuse, fraud and crimes against humanity, who has an inner secretive network tighter than organized crime and government combined (giggle), who has hidden and ignored the accusations layed upon this man for fourteen years just tried to claim that they didn't know what he was doing because he was REALLY good at keeping a secret???? This, of course, is largely due to the fact that HE created the system of silence and lies.....uh....not quite.

The late Pope John Paul II had long championed the Legionaries for their orthodoxy and ability to bring in vocations and money. Berry has recently written in the U.S. Catholic publication National Catholic Reporter of how the late pope's secretary and No. 2 allegedly intervened to protect Maciel and accept donations on his behalf.

Oh, how naive I am. Silly me, I was thinking that this Maciel guy was like David Fuckin Copperfield! Now it all makes sense. He was a good recruiter and fundraiser.

Got it.

I guess his fundraising days are over, being as he is dead, and all. No harm no foul, eh boys? You can NOW kick him out, and not lose any cash since he can't raise money from beyond the grave. Oh, the irony of "life after death" fundraising.

Maciel founded the Legion in his native Mexico in 1941 and the order's culture was built around Maciel. His photo adorned every Legion building, his biography and writings were studied, and his birthday was celebrated as a feast day. Until recently, Legion members took a vow not to criticize their superiors, including Maciel.

DAYUM! His birthday was a holiday? But, I thought that he was a REALLY good "secret keeper"? Don't you people get all bent out of shape over worshipping men before your god? Oh, that's only if it is...um...a guy from a different cult, I know.

The Vatican set out an initial course of action: the pope would name a personal delegate to lead the order and a commission of study to review the order's founding constitutions. In addition, the Vatican said the pope would name a special investigator to look into the order's lay arm, Regnum Christi, at the lay members' request.

It wasn't clear what powers the delegate would have, however, and what would become of the current leadership.

It isn't clear what powers they will have? Oh, I think it is pretty clear what their marching orders are. Cover up, destroy evidence, and when all else fails, lie, deny, lie, deny. We know the drill. We (those of us free from indoctrination and fear driven guilt) are painfully aware of what damage their "delegates" can create. For example....

The order now claims a membership of more than 800 priests and 2,500 seminarians in 22 countries, along with 70,000 members in Regnum Christi. It runs schools, charities, Catholic news outlets, seminaries for young boys, and universities in Mexico, Italy, Spain and elsewhere. Its U.S. headquarters are in Orange, Connecticut.

Read that again. This man built a cult following that spans the globe, and did so under the protection and support of the vatican.

To see anything else, is simple willful ignorance. Do you realize the cash flow generated by those numbers above? WHY would they risk alienating this group by removing their revered leader in shame?

Folks, you continue to fall for the oldest trick in the book. (not THAT book, jesus christ, pay attention!)

While you are busy watching one hand, the other hand has the answer. The ball is ALWAYS under whatever cup the magician wants it to be. Do you know how you ACTUALLY win that game of chance, and slight of hand?

Don't play.

The beauty of subtle change...

2010-04-25T12:16:00.005-04:00

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iYw8JR1N90o&feature=related

Embedding has been removed from the above video, I urge you to follow the URL and view it, especially if you are younger than 35. It is the video of Sinead O'Connor's performance of "War" on Saturday Night Live. She made that performance in 1992. The video shows her very powerful performance in which she ends with the tearing of a photograph of the Pope.

Sincere apologies were issued by both SNL and Ms. O'Connor following that performance. Even at a young age, I was saddened by her apology. Her very apology reduced the impact of what was then and still is now, a very powerful message. Sinead all but disappeared from public view in the U.S. following that performance. She paid a very high price for her "disrespect", both personally and professionally. She had the guts to do, what many of us wanted to, and yet, we all fell silent as she fell from grace.

Not this time around....

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/eu_pope_britain

LONDON – Britain's Foreign Office issued a hasty apology Sunday to Pope Benedict XVI after publication of an internal memo in which officials joked he could open an abortion clinic, launch a range of condoms or sing a duet with Queen Elizabeth II during a four-day visit in September.

The document, sections of which were published in the Sunday Telegraph newspaper, also proposed the pope could bless a gay marriage, and acknowledge the clerical sex abuse scandal by establishing a hot line for abused children, or honoring abuse whistleblowers.

So, you felt the need to aopolgize? I find that somewhat hard to believe. It appears apologetic on the surface, but if one looks a little beyond the writing, and remembers the punishment dolled out to Ms. O'Connor, I see it quite differently, and it gives me hope.

First of all, those suggestions are not only appropriate, but perfectly toungue in cheek funny. An abortion clinic? Blessing a gay marriage? Good stuff there, kids. However, my favorite is the hotline suggestion. Well done. I don't see WHY that would be offensive to such good people leading such a diligent and loving flock.

Junior officials wrote the memo following a brainstorming session intended to discuss ideas for the visit, the first to Britain by the head of the Roman Catholic Church since Pope John Paul II in 1982.

Though some included advice for Britain's government on how to approach the abuse scandal, the ministry condemned many of the proposals as "ill-judged, naive and disrespectful."

Britain's ambassador to the Vatican, Francis Campbell, met senior Vatican officials offer a formal apology and one individual involved in drafting the memo has been transferred to other duties, the ministry said.

This is truly a thing of beauty. Several people opened their mouths and allowed their voices to be heard. I find it interesting that this memo was "leaked" so carelessly. Was it really? I also find it curious that only ONE of the participating parties was punished, and by punished, I mean "transferred". How appropriate, after all, isn't that what Popey on High did with his offending priests as Red Hat Wearing Ratfucker? Oh, the Karma. Well played, ministry. I feel that transfer was MORE than the aprropriate punishment, in light of the behavior of the "falsely offended" members of the vatican.

"The Foreign Office very much regrets this incident and is deeply sorry for the offense which it has caused," the ministry said in a statement. "We strongly value the close and productive relationship between the U.K. government and the Holy See and look forward to deepening this further with the visit of Pope Benedict to the U.K."

The document featured a diagram listing people likely to have an influential role during, or in commenting on, the visit — which ranked Scottish singer Susan Boyle, the surprise reality television star, as more important than Archbishop of Westminster Vincent Nichols, the head of the Catholic Church in England and Wales.

An accompanying note acknowledged many of the ideas contained in the memo were extreme. "These should not be shared externally...," it read, explaining the document was "the product of a brainstorm which took into account even the most far-fetched of ideas."

Translation: "We are sooooo sorry that we hurted your feewings, but guess what? Susan Boyle is more important than your archbishop!" I also love the attatched memo to the memo. "Don't hold us accountable, after all, these are just ideas...as far fetched as they are, we are looking into them. *wink wink*"

Vatican spokesman Rev. Federico Lombardi said an apology from Britain had been received through the Holy See's embassy. "They supplied all the explanations, and there is nothing to add," Lombardi said.

Do I sense a large roll of duct tape with this one? Lombardi FINALLY kept his mouth shut? I guess he would have to, after all, how can one argue with, "oops, my bad...don't know how you saw that...we are looking into it...we transferred one person...um...somewhere else...kinda."

Sheer perfection.

Britain's Scotland Secretary Jim Murphy on Sunday branded the suggestions contained in the memo as despicable. "These are vile, they're insulting, an embarrassment, and on behalf of the whole of the United Kingdom, I would want to apologize," he said, during an election debate.

During his visit to Scotland and England, Pope Benedict XVI will give a speech in London, attend an ecumenical service at Westminster Abbey and conduct a public mass in Glasgow's Bellahouston Park.

Then the blowhard speaks. There is a key phrase here that can explain his "outrage". Do you see it? "DURING AN ELECTION DEBATE".

Nice try, Jimmy.

So, the changes that have been ever so subtle in the past eighteen years since Ms. O'Connor's performance are that people are not so afraid to speak out against big organizations that shroud themselves in "respect". The penalty seems to have also lessened as the shock waves of the corruption of Catholicism ripple accross the globe.

Thank you, Sinead. I will only accept your apology for apologizing. All those who call out the wrong doings of the most powerful should raise their heads high, and pity those who live in fear of reprisal from those who, themselves, have recently fallen from grace.

I have a headache? blink

2010-04-25T10:13:00.004-04:00

Is Roethlisberger's brain trauma at fault for recent behavior?

By Carl Prine
PITTSBURGH TRIBUNE-REVIEW
Sunday, April 25, 2010

http://www.pittsburghlive.com/x/pittsburghtrib/news/pittsburgh/s_678091.html

On Nov. 22, the helmeted head of Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisberger met the knee of onrushing Kansas City Chiefs linebacker Derrick Johnson.

The quarterback with two Super Bowl rings wobbled off the field and sat out the next game. Less than four months later, he stood accused of raping a Georgia student in a Milledgeville nightclub, and quiet questions began: Six years in the National Football League, 242 sacks, four serious head traumas -- three on the field and one from a nearly fatal 2006 motorcycle crash -- and two sexual assault allegations after boozy evenings in Nevada and Georgia.

On Wednesday, NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell ordered Roethlisberger, 28, to undergo a battery of medical tests, part of a conditional punishment plan that could bench him for up to six games and cost him about $2.8 million.

Medical experts consulted by the Pittsburgh Tribune-Review refused to diagnose the root causes of Roethlisberger's pattern of self-destructive behavior. But frontal lobe brain trauma has long been known to affect mood, judgment, interpersonal relations, foresight and the inhibition that keeps most others from displaying inappropriate social behavior -- what's called "executive function" by neurologists and psychiatrists.

*beats head off of keyboard*

Hey ladies! Forget about Viagra! Juat whack him a few times in his frontal lobe!

Are you FUCKING KIDDING ME?????

Back up the stupid express for just one minute, please. Our "beloved" Big Ben Roethlisberger has now, for AT LEAST, the second time, been accused of sexual assault. Lucky for his stupid ass, there wasn't enough DNA to determine more than the fact that she had sex with a human. I am not making that up. So, the girl dropped the charges so as to NOT be vilified by the media in good ol' Pittsburgh Pennsyltucky. Big Ben (that has new meaning now) is now suspended for six games as punishment from the NFL (No Fucking Logic).

This is my favorite part...

"Ben Roethlisberger is a guy with a lot of concussions," said famed forensic pathologist Cyril Wecht. "It would be a very wise decision, a very appropriate one, for the NFL to test him for damage related to them. That's being very fair to Ben.

"It's conceivable to think that there is a possibility that those concussions have led to some behavioral issues. The question I pose is simple: Can someone with several chronic or repetitive head injuries later display behavior that is socially undesirable? It's certainly possible, but we won't know that unless there is a proper evaluation, then work-up and treatment plan. It would be medically negligent not to include these sorts of tests as a part of this disciplinary process."

Oh Mr. Wecht, I know that you too have been caught with your pants down, so to speak, but really, this is no way for you to redeem yourself politically. You seem to think that this city gives a shit about a player when he is NOT winning gold rings. You are a forensic pathologist. How about you wait until Ben is dead before you render your diagnosis and concerns, k?

This is pretty good too...

Wecht doesn't want to excuse Big Ben's boorish behavior, only to ask the NFL to strongly consider the causes of it, including underlying brain trauma. The former Allegheny County coroner was so concerned with the issue that he convened a March 12 and 13 pow-wow of leading concussion experts at Duquesne University -- a conference he provocatively titled "Is Football Bad for the Brain?"

IS FOOTBALL BAD FOR THE BRAIN???? Again, are you FUCKING KIDDING ME??? No, not a problem to be hit in the head repeatedly, Mr. Wecht. I see why you make the big bucks there, genius.

I think that the question is, "should we excuse someone who gets paid A LOT of money to be hit in the head, for bad behavior that may or may not be attributed to his CHOICE in profession?"

Jesus jumped up FUCK, people! This asshole was an asshole long before he took a few whacks from defensive linemen. You know how I know that? BECAUSE HE JOINED THE NFL! That seems to be all you morons recruit anymore. (again, thank you, Titans!)

Please explain to me again, why it is that Ben likes to fuck young girls who are drunk out of their minds in public places...I will be on the edge of my seat waiting to hear how it is actually the lineman's fault for hitting Benny too hard.

I say, HIT HIM AGAIN! Hit this asshole as many times as it takes to get through his ego driven skull that women are not objects to be abused and left as garbage!

Maybe we should hold the entire NFL responsible for promoting an event that causes men to rape women. How does THAT sound, you feeble minded twits? No? You don't like that? Then stop making excuses for assholes who choose to live their lives as a perpetual twelve year old, including playing a game for a living and doing things that they have been told repeatedly NOT to do!

If you can't control your gladiators because they have "frontal lobe" damage..then do us all a favor and put them back in their cages.

In a society that LOVES to make excuses and lay blame for bad behavior, you sure have stepped up your game with this one.

Ben's representatives won't comment. HAHAHA! Even THEY know this is bullshit!

Stop this crap. They know the risks when they join this idiotic organization. I don't see why you have to make the rest of us unsafe by justifying what they KNOW can be a result of their choices.

Concussions can make a pro ball player into an asshole rapist. Beautiful.

"Until we examine a lot of people like Ben Roethlisberger and study the histories of brain injury and relate them to exhibited behavior, we won't be able to answer the essential questions that need to be answered," Mayer said. "There's so much more we need to know."

That's why the NFL last week donated $1 million to Boston University to study chronic traumatic encephalopathy. Known simply as "CTE" or "punchdrunk syndrome," it's a degenerative brain condition that affects cognition and player conduct, eventually leading to dementia. Post-mortem examinations of the brains of Steelers Terry Long, Justin Strzelczyk and Hall of Fame center Mike Webster found evidence of the syndrome.

"punchdrunk syndrome"? You mean, "I am a moron syndrome". I let another man beat me senseless, and then I can do whatever I want because of it.

How do you plan on "preventing" this so-called condition of turning an otherwise "great all American guy" into a douche bag?

Maybe bigger helmets? No? ummmm...how about you just play flag football. No?

You won't do shit about it. I know this because it is the violence and physical strain of the game that puts asses in the seats. Those asses pay for your private jets.

Good luck selling flag football tickets, or banning hitting someone in the head.

Just another excuse to add to the list of staggeringly stupid shit spouted by both the medical community and it's parnership with the NFL.

You never cease to disappoint.

Holy shit! I just became a Titans fan!

2010-04-25T08:27:00.005-04:00

Titans get Rhodes Scholar Myron Rolle in sixth round
By Doug Farrar

The Tennessee Titans may have questions about what they see on game film from their sixth-round safety, but there won't be any questions about his intelligence, determination or character. With the 207th overall pick (the final pick in the sixth round), Tennessee drafted Florida State's Myron Rolle. There's some real football skill there, but it's what Rolle did outside of football in the 2009 season that made news.

Rolle, who graduated in 2 ½ years from Florida State with a 3.75 GPA, spent the 2009 football season as a Rhodes Scholar, studying in Oxford, England at the highest academic level. Still, he was labeled by some as a football deserter - someone whose love for the game was questioned. He came back to the game in time for all the 2010 pre-draft activities, recording decent numbers at the scouting combine and in a private workout for NFL scouts.

http://sports.yahoo.com/nfl/blog/shutdown_corner/post/Titans-get-Rhodes-Scholar-Myron-Rolle-in-sixth-r?urn=nfl,236457

In recent years, I have all but refused to watch professional sporting events in the U.S. The reasons are not that complicated. I am tired of hearing about how our overpaid, over-indulged, severely character flawed athletes are "American heros". Thanks to Ben Roethlisberger, my city has, yet again, sustained embarrassment thanks to one of our so-called heros. Ben, apparently, has an affinity for young, drunk college students, and can't seem to sort out the need for self control. This is, of course, after having the pleasure of other "heros" like Plaxico Burres, the idiot who shot himself in the leg. Ahh, the glory of the NFL.

Now, here comes Mr. Rolle. A Rhodes Scholar??? Unbelieveable. For an organization who prides themselves on the "character" of their members, "character" certainly is in short supply. I am happy to see that someone with a brain, priority systems, and character FINALLY entered their ranks. Congratulations, Dr. Rolle. What a novel concept, Mr. Rolle explains that exercizing his brain is just as important and necessary as exercizing his body. As a matter of fact, he delves further and explains that it is NECESSARY to exercize both. Stunning.

So, I will make this short. If the parents out there reading this have half a brain in their heads, they will tell their children EXACTLY what constitutes a role model, and Mr. Rolle is it. I don't care if he warms the bench for ten years. This man has accomplished more than imaginable for most people, and he did it with determination and intelligence. THAT is a role model...even without a Super Bowl ring.

Congratulations to the Tennessee Titans, he may have been a last round choice, but to those of us who are tired of the bullshit of the NFL, you just redeemed a little bit of my respect. For what it is worth...

This year, I will watch the Titans...and hope to see Dr. Rolle take the field, just so that I can tell my sons who he is.

Oh, and on a side note, a young, athletically gifted, brilliant young man...and he is BLACK! LOL The Kryptonite of the Republican party. It is a true thing of beauty...now hurry up, trailor dwelling, conservative NFL fans, buy his jersey! HAHAHA!

Mother, May I?

2010-04-25T06:39:00.005-04:00

I remember being a small child and playing "Mother, may I?" on the school playground. For those of you who have never played that game, (this is specifically directed at you!) it was a game of trickery and manners. One child stood a distance from a line of other children. The "mother" child would give instructions like "take one giant step forward". The other children then had to respond with "Mother, may I?". Permission was then either granted or denied. If the child did not state "Mother, may I?" before carrying out the action, they went back to the starting line. The "mother" child would use inflection and speed of the command to trick the child into NOT saying the proper response.The first child to be able to reach out and touch "mother" was declared the winner, and had the privledge of becoming "mother" in the next round.

I took my ten year old son to work with me this past week, in honor of "take your child to work day", which apparently interferes with the public school system's state fund raising...otherwise known as "standardized testing". However, that is another rant for another day.

My son awakened at 4:45am in excitement for his journey to work with Mom. I am employed in a labor capacity with ALL MEN! This is a ten year old boy's dream job. He was excited to see our equipment and get a ride in the infamous John Deere Gator that he has heard so much about. We stopped at the local gas station for snacks and coffee for Mom. He placed his snacks on the counter and said "good morning!" to the young man that rings up my coffee every morning. The young man smiled and conversed with Adam for several minutes about the excitement of his day. Adam then bound out the front door smiling and thanking the young man for wishing him well in his adventure.

While we drove the 45 minutes it takes for me to arrive at work, I reminded Adam to please use his good manners and to closely follow instructions while in the workplace. I have three sons, ages almost 15, almost 13 and 10. (Some days I wish that I could put a shot of Whiskey in my coffee!) Adam is the one who requires constant reminders about EVERYTHING. I was a little stressed out about taking this particular child to work with me that day. He is my "difficult" child. He is strong willed and high energy at all times. This is a parenting challenge, to say the least.

Our first task of the day is to clean the litter from the sidewalks of several city blocks. Adam happily, and dutifully went about his task without complaint, and even listened when I told him to try NOT to get run over by a bus. Whew, first stressor dealt with. Along his journey, we ran into one of the department managers. I introduced Adam to him, and Adam reached out his hand and said, "Hello, Mr. ___". I was so proud of him. When the man walked away, Adam asked me if he was a boss. I said yes, and asked him how he knew that. He said, "He looked like a boss, and he wears a tie, Mom...geeez *eye roll*". Well played, Adam.

Adam worked well with my co-workers, and remembered to always give them a title when speaking directly to them. Mr. Mike was his favorite. He helped him bend a penny in a vice. Oh, the things that entertain males. Mr. Dave showed him how the Robins will eat the grubs from the newly cut sod, and helped Adam up when he stumbled and fell, landing a large piece of sod directly over his face. Adam got up laughing, and Mr. Dave couldn't help but laugh along. Mr. Alex commiserated endlessly with Adam over the pains of dealing with Mom everyday. Thanks, Alex. Mr. Joe showed Adam how to use the mower, and even let him cut for a while. Adam beamed all day long. I began to wonder if his face would cramp from the permanent smile.

Finally, it is lunchtime. We go to the Cafe located on the seventh floor, and I am anxious for Adam to meet one of the nicest people employed in this hospital, another Mr. Joe. He is the head chef. Adam meets him, shakes his hand and carries a fairly long conversation about his day thus far. Then it is time to order lunch, and Adam does so, remembering to say "please" and "thank you". He gobbled down his personally crafted grilled cheese (just what head culinary chef LOVES to prepare) and we head back to work for the afternoon. We saw, and met several more managers throughout the day, and even a Vice President. Adam carried himself like a proud little man, and never needed further reminding of how to behave.

When I went to the Cafe the following day to order my lunch, the man behind the counter asked to speak with me for a moment. He stated that he was stunned by Adam's behavior and complimented me on how polite and happy he was. I actually hear this quite often in reference to all three of my boys, and have heard it since they were very young. I replied to him with thanks and told him that it saddens me that my son stands out, simply because he was respectful. He proceded to tell me that there were many children in there the previous day, they were children of doctors, administrators and CFOs. He said that they were rude and demanding, just like their parents. He thanked me again for raising a son that knows how to treat people, even the lowly people working behind a counter. I laughed and said, "It isn't that difficult, when you understand what it feels like to be viewed as "lowly".

I was proud of my son that day, and everyday for various things. You see, I spend my day observing people, and their behavior. I see people bump into each other without even so much as an "excuse me". I see them drop doors on the people entering behind them. I see them berate the men and women at the information desk, as if they are not even worthy of basic human respect. I see you refuse to hang up your cell phone, or even take pause when ordering your lunch. I rarely hear the words, "please" or "thank you". I see children damaging other's property or running around screaming while the mother or father chats away on their phone, or simply ignores them. I hear children calling adults by their first names and seemingly not even know the existance of the word, "please" when making a request.

I have taught my sons to ALWAYS hold a door for someone, especially someone struggling with it, even if you don't plan on entering yourself. I have taught them to help people when they see the need for it. I have instructed them repeatedly on the need to show respect and poise when faced with someone deserving of it. They are to ALWAYS show basic human kindness and respect, and if they do not, they will be reprimaded for it, even if god himself is standing there. The incredible thing is, I don't have to remind them. They see the positive reactions and benefits of behaving properly, and they continue with what is CLEARLY working for them. My 15 years old son can enter the local store or mall with his friends, and NOT be followed by the manager or security simply because he has carried himself appropriately and spoken with respect to those people.

I suppose that I am not so much speaking about manners, as I am about respect and kindness. Does one not reflect another? Where did this lost art go? Is it really that difficult to take a moment to tap into your instinctual human empathy and behave the way that you would like to see other behave toward you? Why have we lost this skill? Granted, it is difficult to smile through the rudeness of others, but why do we succumb to the same behavior? I am guilty of that, myself. When met with someone who behaves in a way that is disgusting or distainful, I will open my mouth and give them a little dose of their own medicine. That, in itself, is a delicate art. I am not so delicate. LOL I have been chastised by my own sons for that very behavior. Good for them, even their mother is not exempt from behaving appropriately.

I wonder, as they grow older, will they succumb to the frustration of dealing within a rude and self-serving society? Have I actually harmed their ability to deal in a world where their behavior is all but rendered obsolete? I truly hope not. I write this, in the hope that there are others feeling the same frustration and confusion. I also write it in the hopes that some of you will pull your heads from your asses and start raising your children as human beings instead of wild animals with no self control or language skills!

There is a fast food restaurant near where I work, and the sign on the front counter states this....

"We will be more than happy to assist you when you hang up your phone. Until then, we will take the next customer in line. Thank you, MGMT."

Good for you. It's a start.

Jesus, people. You are being parented by Burger King. Wake up.

I stop.....and think...

2010-04-23T17:58:00.007-04:00

Death of 'Caveman' ends an era in Idaho
Richard Zimmerman, known to all as Dugout Dick, succumbs at 94.

Known as the "Salmon River Caveman," Richard Zimmerman lived an essentially 19th century lifestyle, a digital-age anachronism who never owned a telephone or a television and lived almost entirely off the land.

"He was in his home at the caves at the end, and it was his wish to die there," said Connie Fitte, who lived across the river. "He was the epitome of the free spirit."

Richard Zimmerman had been in declining health when he died Wednesday.

Few knew him by his given name. To friends and visitors to his jumble of cave-like homes scrabbled from a rocky shoulder of the Salmon River, he was Dugout Dick.

Read more: http://www.idahostatesman.com/2010/04/23/1164899/death-of-caveman-ends-an-era-in.html#ixzz0lxmY7SAp

I had never heard of this man prior to reading this article. I intend to do some more reading about him and those who lived similar lives. I find it humorous that I will use technology to research such a man, but that is the very thought that made me take pause, and....think.

I thought about my life, and what a stark contrast it is to his. I am somewhat resistant to technology,or at least I thought I was. I refused to use computers for many years. I refused to allow my children to use the internet for what seemed, to them, to be an eternity. I resisted texting and cell phones, to the point of teasing from friends...well...that is...until recently. I have "caved" to all of the pressures of "necessary technology".

When I try to imagine a life lived entirely dependent upon one's own resources and personal resolve, I cannot fathom the loneliness. I wonder if he felt profound loneliness, or a peace that is immeasurable by the technologically savvy world that he left behind. There is a part of me that envies him tremendously. I cannot imagine the beauty that he experienced. I have seen starry nights and beautiful sunsets. I imagine a man quietly strumming his guitar with nothing to interfere with the pure sound of music created from an uninterrupted emotion. If I combine those beautiful nights with a sound so pure, my mind wanders into what feels like a dream. One of the most beautiful sounds on this earth is the sound of rain falling in harmony with nature. I wonder how many nights he fell asleep to the rhythm of raindrops and the sounds of animals that live as freely as he did. Is that what his music sounded like? I wish I could have heard it, just once. Where did his mind go when he felt peace? I would love to visit that place.

The Earth yielded everything that he required to stay alive. He worked hand in hand with what we disposed of, discarded, and what we take for granted, just to sustain his life...for over 90 years. I find myself in a very strange emotional place while I think of what it must have been like to be him. What was it like to fall asleep in pure silence without the touch of human companionship? It saddens me to think that he lacked one of the greatest feelings on this incredible planet, while experiencing things that most of us will never know. His life could not have been an easy one. To have the soil yield what your body needs to live, or to have animals provide necessary sustenance, you must nurture both...and then destroy them. We, "civilized society", have the pleasure of not raising and nurturing the animals that we eat. We find it a difficult task to even find the time and energy to gather our food at a market where the sweat and ugly part of killing our food has already been done for us. Was he a callous man who could raise an animal from a baby, kill it, and devour it with the idea that "that is just what we do to survive", or did he truly realize the harsh reality of nature's food chain, and accept his place within it?

We have gardens on our patios, or little fenced in areas where we grow things as a hobby. I don't know anyone who sustains their family off of what they grow on their own. We go to our local large chain store, or if you are a more caring person, you head to your local nursery and gather your seedlings, fertilizer, soil, animal repellent, stakes and cages, pots, cute little plant labels, and even ridiculous trinkets to decorate our gardens. What would he say about that? I imagine him laughing at our inability to keep our tomatoes from falling off the vine before they ripen, and then running inside to Google "tomato falls off vine before ripe". Did he use the eggshells from his chickens to prevent the blossom end rot that we would take an hour to determine after asking three different "professionals"? Well, I know he didn't buy a fungicide sold to him by a teenager wearing an orange apron. I have heard so many people say, "I would love to grow my own fruits and vegetables, but it is just too much of a hassle, and I don't have time for that." These are the same people who complain relentlessly about the sub standard quality of those same items sold by their local grocer.

This man took, what we considered "trash", and used it as if it were brand new. Then, incredibly, WE paid him to live in it! He did not charge a fee that would ever make him wealthy, but merely enough to help him to survive. How many times have we all heard this, "My_____ broke this weekend, so I thought about fixing it. I spent all weekend trying to find the parts, and then I realized that I needed a new tool to fix it, so I said 'to hell with it', and I just bought a new one. It only cost me___ more to buy a new one than to fix it." Well, not only did he "fix it", but he may have just used it...as is. He used it the way you left it...broken. Is a door really "broken" or "outdated", or are we just spoiled over-indulged brats?

As I sit here, I hear the pump running on my fishtank. I hear the (riding) mower outside. I hear the noise from my son's room, and the sound of the fan in my laptop, and I wonder to myself, is this the music of MY life? My refrigerator is full of food purchased from someone who paid someone else to kill or harvest it. My windows have just enough...whatever...in them to keep out the damaging rays of the sun that could fade the paint on my walls. I have a new "energy efficient" furnace with a filtration system to keep out of of those nasty things that the guy who sold it to me said were there. I have three vehicles sitting in my driveway, one of which is one of my favorite possessions. I pay $20 more for a bag of dog food because my dog is allergic to...um...something....in the others. I complain relentlessly about how my job barely allows me to make ends meet, but the good news is, I can drive home in my truck.

I am actually a "blue collar" worker. Yes, I get dirty and I sweat to earn my paycheck. Until now, I thought I had a physically demanding job. What I realized is that someone else provides me the opportunity to get dirty and sweat, no one provided that to him. He did it on his own, and relied solely on himself to provide even the soil that stained his clothes. I doubt that he used Oxy Clean or Tide to remove that soil. I wonder if he even cared that it was there.

His photograph is one of a man who has been beaten by the sun, and soaked by the rain for 94 years. We hear the lyrics to songs that talk about the callouses of an old man's hands. I looked at my hands, just now, and I can see the callouses of my life, and the age creeping into the crevices of my fingers. What did his hands look like when he was my age? My hands have held my sons, and felt the touch of the people that I love. Will they remember the feel of my touch? I am a woman, and we have built an entire industry around our skin and our appearance, but he never saw or felt you. I doubt that he ever knew or cared what "alpha hydroxy" was or was supposed to do. Come to think of it, neither do I, and I bet you don't either.

My goodness, how we strive to have so much, and we don't even know what it's purpose is. To us, music is what comes out of expensive speakers mounted in just the right places to accomplish the perfect sound. What was music to him? What inspired him to pick up that guitar and play it? Would we have even considered it to be any good? I guess to understand whether or not it was "good", we would have to feel what inspired it. What a shame, we never will.

I do not envy the hard work that was required to live the life that he chose, and I do not envy the loss of human companionship. I do, however, envy the freedom that he experienced. It came at a heavy price, and that was the life that I lead. I wish that I could have heard his music and felt his hands. I wish that I could have seen the sights that surrounded him and felt the rhythm of the rain, in the ways that he did. But, I would then like to awaken from my dream, and see the people that I love, and hold my sons after a long day at work.

Life is full of choices, consequences, and reward. I try to keep a balance in my life that allows me to experience this world and yet remain a part of it. He chose to leave it behind, and live by his own hand. It is an admirable and poetic existence. I am not a poet, and I do not seek to be admired. My guess is, neither was he, nor was that his desire.

So, I have decided that I will be happy in my life, and hope that he was happy in his. There are people in this world who strive for fame and notoriety, yet he did everything to avoid it. In his attempts at closing out the rest of the world, he invited us in. Thank you, Mr. Zimmerman, for giving us a look at the world that we live in. Sometimes, it takes just stopping and trying to see the world through someone else's eyes, just to see it through your own.

..and Ratzinger hums...."The Good Old Days..."

2010-04-17T08:04:00.006-04:00

I am not quite sure what word to use that truly encompasses the idea that welcoming a Holocaust denier wasn't all that bad of a PR move in light of Ratzinger's current political quandry.

http://uk.news.yahoo.com/18/20100416/tuk-bishop-fined-for-holocaust-denial-a7ad41d.html

The case prompted a rare comment on religious matters by German Chancellor Angela Merkel, who called on Benedict to "clarify unambiguously that there can be no denial" the Nazis killed six million Jews.

The German pope later admitted mistakes in his handling of the case, saying he was unaware of Williamson's latest remarks and stressed that it was "intolerable" to dispute the facts of the Holocaust.

The trial comes amid a ballooning sexual abuse scandal rocking the Catholic church, with hundreds of people coming forward in Germany and other countries around the world saying they were molested by predatory priests.

Benedict himself has been accused of turning a blind eye to abuse before he became pope.

Williamson has said he wished to apologise to anyone offended by his comments but has refused to retract his assertions, saying only that he would re-examine the historical evidence.

The court on Friday heard an excerpt of the interview, in which Williamson is heard telling the interviewer: "Be careful, this is against the law in Germany."

So, Dick, you are going to "re-examine the historical evidence", huh? *blink* Let me help you. Before Hitler's regime, there were a lot of Jews. After Hitler's regime, there were a whole lot less Jews. Where did they go? YOU are going to re-examine the evidence..LOL. I will be waiting on the edge of my seat to FINALLY have the REAL truth, as provided by a mid-ranking minion of a large cult. You do that, Dick. Find the truth, and then type it all out in Latin, and we can call it your "manifesto". Countless historians have weighed in on the subject, but it is YOUR research that has us completely spellbound. I can't wait to read about your explanation for the survivors tales of torture, and eye witness accounts of what vast suffering plagued their friends, families and neighbors. Maybe those tattoos they sport are numbers from their stay in Hitler's most elite country clubs. Maybe they weren't really tortured and killed in the gas chambers. Maybe they all got together and orchestrated the largest "disappearance" in human history. Geeesh, you would think that you deniers would have found a few of them by now. Maybe Hitler and the Nazis used their Acme ray guns and vaporized them! Maybe it was 10,000 Jews, maybe 300,000...or maybe 6 million. WHAT THE FUCK DIFFERENCE DOES IT MAKE???

Oh, I know the answer to that one. You think that "THE JEWS" have extorted an excessive amount of funds due to exagerated claims of loss of life and crimes against humanity. Your own deep rooted hatred of an entire group of people based upon their faith has blinded you to human suffering and made this entire thing about money. Well I have to say, you joined the right group.

I can give you some peace, here. Shhh, don't tell anyone, but pope Ratfucker agrees with you. He just can't say it out loud because people are listening, and THAT would be bad! It is NEVER good, when attempting to gather support, to use unpopular speech. (If you are following along, you know who said that.) You don't like when a group with a different view has more financial backing than you do. You feel threatened by their numbers and the loyalty of their followers. HAHA! Oh, the irony.

So, you are going to try to diminish the amount of deaths, and the level of inhumanity of the crimes. Good luck with that. The average moderately intelligent person does not care if it was 10,000...300,000 or 6 million. You see, we aren't blinded by some ficticious war over a sandy haired, blue eyed (*blink*) hippie who tried to tell people to stop being assholes. It is amazing how one can sum up your bullshit in one sentence. Listen, maybe they killed him, maybe they didn't. Look at it this way, if they did...you should THANK them! His death is what allows you to sin freely, and without reprisal from that god guy! Which brings me to the whole point of this snark and irony...What other skeletons do you have in your closet, Dick?

Frank Collin, a native of Chicago, joined George Lincoln Rockwell's National-Socialist White People's Party in the 1960s. He broke with the NSWPP due to a disagreement with Rockwell's successor, Matt Koehl, who had assumed the leadership role by popular vote after Rockwell's August 25, 1967 assassination by a disgruntled member, John Patsalos, who used the name "John Patler" during his tenure in the NSWPP.

Collin's downfall began with the revelation that his father, Max Simon Collin, was a Jew whose original surname had been "Cohen". Max Cohen/Collin claimed to have been a prisoner at Dachau concentration camp, where Frank Collin was said to have been conceived.

While president of the NSPA, Collin was arrested by Michigan police while having sex with a pair of 10-year-old boys. These revelations led to his dismissal from the neo-Nazi movement. A psychiatrist who interviewed Collin declared that he was "consumed by hatred for his father"; it was argued that Collin rejected his father by becoming a neo-Nazi and adopting and publicly espousing antisemitic beliefs.

Collin was convicted of child molestation and sent to Pontiac prison in 1979.[2] He served three years of a seven year sentence.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frank_Collin

Uh oh. Is this a common link? You see, Dick, there is a common occurance among molesters,and that is deep rooted self hatred. In order to gain power over those feelings, the mentally disturbed molester will target someone or something else to hate. When hatred grows to a painful level, the victimizer releases that hatred in a need to cause another the pain and suffering that they feel. That was complicated, I know. Let me put it this way, the Nazi groups here in the US recruit young boys and hide them deep in wooded areas. They hide from the general public and indoctrinate the youth, many of whom come from horrible backgrounds, with their hatred and need for vengeance. One of their tools is molestation.

I am not, in the least bit surprised, to find common psychological disorders within your ranks. You are ALL narcissistic personalities determined to have the final word...at any and all costs. Those costs include our children, and the mental stability of your followers.

Oh poor popey Ratfucker. He has quite a mess to sort out...and frankly, he isn't that good of a PR guy. Maybe a more charismatic speaker is required to get you out of this mess....I can think of one...

As a Christian I have no duty to allow myself to be cheated, but I have the duty to be a fighter for truth and justice.

Adolph Hitler

It's time to pray.

2010-04-15T05:21:00.002-04:00

Hartford, Connecticut (CNN) -- A bill in Connecticut's legislature that would remove the statute of limitations on child sexual abuse cases has sparked a fervent response from the state's Roman Catholic bishops, who released a letter to parishioners Saturday imploring them to oppose the measure.

Politics from the pulpit? What happened to your fantasy of separation of church and state? I guess since YOU don't abide by "the rules", then neither will we. TIME TO PAY TAXES! So, the men in red dresses speak out again. This is priceless.

The proposed change to the law would put "all Church institutions, including your parish, at risk," says the letter, which was signed by Connecticut's three Roman Catholic bishops.

The letter is posted on the Web site of the Connecticut Catholic Public Affairs Conference, the public policy and advocacy office of Connecticut's Catholic bishops. It asks parishioners to contact their legislators in opposition of the bill.

The "legislation would undermine the mission of the Catholic Church in Connecticut, threatening our parishes, our schools, and our Catholic Charities," the letter says.

The Catholic archdiocese of Hartford also published a pulpit announcement on its Web site, which was to be read during Mass on Sunday, urging parishioners to express opposition to the bill.

What I want to know is, how the fuck a supposedly sentinent human being can sit on a wooden bench, hear their puppet say "oppose legislation that erradicates the statute of limitations" on the worst crime imaginable, and nod their heads in agreement.

Listen you fuckin idiots, if you are not harboring molesters, and the "false accusers" have no evidence of the alleged crimes, you have nothing to worry about. But you know better, don't you...you KNOW that you are harboring molesters, and you care more about your fucking church than you do about your fellow man. Typical arrogant Catholics. Do you jackasses even know that one of the classic traits of a cult and a cult leader is paranoia? Yes, it is true. ALL cults and their leaders show a fear of reprisal for the purity of their beliefs, and pass that fear to their willing sheep. They wipe away their wrong doing by claiming that there is a conspiracy afoot designed to destroy what you hold so dear...your lies.

What really goes through your head when you hear the red dress guy say, "all church institutions are at risk, including your parish..."? Please tell me that you wonder if they know something you don't, like that YOUR priest is a molester. Because any other thought is simply paranoia and conjured fear at the hands of manipulative cult leaders. Will you think twice about their stand on this issue? Do you even ask yourselves why the need for such fear?

To help you, I suggest that you read up on the lifelong effects of sexual abuse. It can take decades for a victim to come to terms with what happened to them. Their lives are forever altered from that moment forward, whether they consciously realize it or not. The least that we, as acommunity, can give them, is time. I am willing to give them a lifetime to find peace...yet you Catholics won't. UN FUCKING BELIEVEABLE!

I have another suggestion, be careful campaigning from the pulpit, because one day, you may find yourselves being hit where it hurts more than just bad PR. We will hit you in the wallet. Let me help you out with this one. Instead of waiting for living, breathing human beings to listen to you....try this one out...

Dear god...

Please use your hand of justice and help the people to see the truth and love within your church. Guide us and give us the strength to find the flaws within our own humanity, and see the sufferings of those who have been hurt by evil that has infiltrated your church. May our courts be fair, and just, and may all those who have brought harm to our children be punished by human laws guided by your hand, and may they face final judgement before you. We give our trust and our faith to you, almighty god.

There. See? He will fix it...now shut the fuck up...and see the power of your "god" in action.

Good luck with that. In the meantime, we will put your priests, bishops...and even your pope behind bars, if THAT is what OUR laws determine.

You better start praying for the right things...1,000 years is sufficient time to figure out what the "right thing" is, don't you think?

fuckin hypocrites.

http://www.cnn.com/2010/CRIME/04/11/connecticut.abuse.bill/index.html?eref=rss_topstories&utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+rss%2Fcnn_topstories+%28RSS%3A+Top+Stories%29

Could you PLEASE keep your god and your politics OUT of my uterus??

2010-04-14T18:38:00.004-04:00

LINCOLN, Neb. – Two first-of-their-kind laws in Nebraska put new restrictions on abortion, including one that uses a new legal rationale for a ban on later-term abortions.

That law bars the procedure at and after 20 weeks of pregnancy based on the assertion that fetuses can feel pain at that point. The other requires women be screened before having abortions for mental health issues and other risk factors indicating if they might have problems afterward.

A national abortion rights group already appeared to be girding for a legal challenge, calling the ban at or after 20 weeks "flatly unconstitutional."

Oh, enough of this bullshit. I still don't know, or care what the freakin constitution has to do with my uterus. Jesus Christ, they didn't even know what a uterus was when it was written. You can twist and turn the "rights of the individual" all day long, and you have yet to show me where the constitution mentions anything about governing an internal organ. Get a grip.

Here is my stand on abortion. I am Pro-Life for myself, and ONLY myself. I, however, want to know that if my child were to be born deformed or mentally deficient, that I retain the right to medically and safely terminate my pregnancy.

What the fuck is so complicated about that?

Listen to me, and listen carefully. IF a woman gets pregnant, and had the desire and ability to terminate the pregnancy JUST BECAUSE she was too "lazy" or "irresponsible" to be a mother, why the FUCK would you want her raising a child? You show me where, in the constitution, it states that YOU should have the right to make that determination.

Now, the rights of the father. There aren't any. When he decided to trust her to prevent the pregnancy, and didn't wrap his dick, he terminated his right to an opinion. He had another option, and that is to NOT ejaculate happily inside of her, OR to decline having sex at all if he felt that he did not want to risk creating a child that she may abort.

Next issue, drug addicted mothers. Yeah, good plan assholes. Force THEM to give birth. How many crack babies are YOU willing to raise when they are placed in our already overburdened foster care system? Oh, none? Then shut up.

Do I really have to address rape, incest and twelve year old mothers? If I do, you are not worth talking to.

I do not give a rats ass what fictional diety you believe in, or how far on the right side of the fence you sit. You have NO right to tell a woman what she can and cannot do with what is contained within her own body. Period. You jeopardize ALL of our rights when you force these issues. How much would you like US to invade YOUR body?

You are so fucking desperate now, that you have decided when a fetus can feel pain? Really? What the fuck difference does THAT make? You seem to care very little for the pain of growing up with a crack addicted mother. Morons.

We can split hairs all day long on the issue of what is a "baby", what is a "fetus"..blah blah

How about this...

You give birth to your babies..

and leave the fetus killing up to the rational and not deluded...

K?

Oh, and by the way, do us all a favor. When you give birth to your one armed, three legged drooling pile of skin, keep it the hell out of OUR liberal social programs, would ya?

After all, you guys keep cutting the funding...so leave what is left for the "welfare sucking" liberals that were forced to give birth. I will happily pay for them, AND adopt their children. I doubt that you would.

Thanks.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/us_nebraska_abortion_laws

Excuse me, Mr. Lombardi, has celibacy made you...cranky...or just frustratingly arrogant...

2010-04-14T17:37:00.003-04:00

Asked about this at a briefing on the pope's trip to Malta this weekend, Vatican spokesman Father Federico Lombardi scoffed.

"This is a bizarre idea to say the least. It looks like the intent is to make a public opinion splash. I think they should look for something more serious and concrete before we can respond to it," he said.

"The pope's visit (to Britain) is a visit of state, and so it would be very strange if during a state visit the person who is invited to make a state visit is arrested," he said.

Can you say "POLITICAL LIABILTY"? This asshole wouldn't know "concrete" unless it was in the foundation of another monsterous, gold encrusted investment...you know, a church.

Did this pompous ass just demand "something more serious and concrete"? Really?

Scoff away, you arrogant, out of touch, hypocritical, heartless pile of dog shit! Everytime you speak, I can hear the sounds of silence in your tithing baskets. Keep talking, asshole.

http://insidecatholic.com/Joomla/index.php?option=com_content&task=view&id=6074&Itemid=48

THIS, of course, is my favorite...read...and enjoy...

6. The pope's recent trip to the Holy Land was probably the last place on earth where the Vatican would want to launch a news cycle dedicated to Benedict and the Hitler Youth, but that is precisely what happened. In a May 12 press conference, responding to media commentary on the pope's visit and speech at the Yad Vashem Holocaust memorial, Father Lombardi vehemently denied that the young Joseph Ratzinger had been enrolled in the Nazi Hitler Youth program. "The pope has said he never, never was a member of the Hitler Youth, which was a movement of fanatical volunteers," he said.

Then-Cardinal Ratzinger himself, however, in a 1996 book of interviews, Salt of the Earth, said that he had been drafted into the Hitler Youth, because membership in the movement had been made compulsory by the Nazi regime. Father Lombardi's clumsy attempt to deny something that the pope himself had already conceded long ago reawakened the story, prompting media agencies around the world to rehash the details.

"Father" Lombardi is a living, breathing example of what is wrong with, not just Catholicism, but organized religion as a whole. There is a level of "untouchable arrogance" in this man that just begs to be silenced.

It is ironic, that he is "head of the press office" that heads the "press office" for god. That makes me laugh. God can't talk directly to you. Then there is the Pope. He is human, right? Well, apparently, HE can't talk directly to you either. So, there is this "Press office" that speaks on his behalf. The head of this debacle is "Father" Lombardi. You Catholics sure do have A LOT of "middle men". Maybe this is why you are so fucked up. Listen, when ONE MAN cannot properly carry the message of ONE OTHER MAN correctly and factually....how the FUCK do you people trust all of the other crap that they spew? I mean, really, this isn't a long chain of command, is it? God...Pope...Lombardi. *eye roll*

I wonder if good ol' Ratzinger (Benedict, whatever) cringes when Lombardi speaks like husbands cringe when their wives speak after a few glasses of wine at the company Christmas party. I only ponder that because it seems as though Lombardi is taking quite a few liberties that he is not entitled to. I would think that the leader of such a wonderfully loving and tolerant religion would NEVER condone "scoffing" at the idea of being arrested for assisting in the cover up of countless cases of child molestation. Would he?

Let's talk about this, in all seriousness. This man, Ratzinger, is the closest thing you Catholics have to god, right? Why, then, does he require immunity under the title "head of state"? Isn't he the head of....oh...morality...righteousness....truth...sanctity...and on and on your bullshit goes. What does he have to hide? Why does he NOT open a FULL investigation into ALL claims of sexual abuse within his flock? Why does he hide? He hides behind the walls of a golden palace. He hides in a bulletproof carriage. He hides behind the misguided fumblings of Lombardi. He hides from his loyal followers, for fuck's sake!

If it were not for the suffering of countless abuse victims, I would find this humorous...but I do not.

The Vatican said on Tuesday Pope Benedict was willing to meet more sexual abuse victims but not under media pressure and scoffed at calls for the pope to be arrested when he visits Britain in September.

The pope feels that meetings with victims should take place "in a climate that is intentionally one of reflection, discreet, and not under pressure of the glare of the media, so he can have a real possibility to listen and communicate personally," Lombardi said.

The Vatican has rejected accusations the pope helped to cover up abuse by priests in jobs he held before his election in 2005 and has accused the media of waging a "despicable campaign of defamation" against him.

Is Ratzinger too busy campaigning for anti-abortion legislation or shutting down sex education for our youth that he cannot open the golden palace and hear the pleas and see the tears of his victimized followers? Does he need to repeatedly slap them in the face by speaking through a moron like Lombardi? Does this organization not, at the very least, owe these people the opportunity to speak, and provide the very proof that the asshole, Lombardi, demands?

Apparently not.

Instead, The Vatican just continues to spin and twist their way through lie after lie, and cover-up after cover-up. I see why you people so dutifully follow their lead. *blink*

You might want to think about just praying to your god in your kitchen. There is less room for "miscommunication" when going through "middle men". According to your own beliefs...he will hear you.

*eye roll*

The crisis over abuse of children by priests shows no sign of abating, with new revelations emerging almost daily and the Vatican scrambling to find a response strategy.

Scramble, twist, lie, manuipulate and deny...but know this. Justice will be served...by man...not your delusions.

...in time.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20100413/wl_nm/us_pope_abuse_1

"Power corrupts, and absolute power corrupts absolutely"

2010-04-11T07:45:00.004-04:00

I have listened to the braindead justifications spewed by the dutiful followers of the Catholic church since the onset of this "scandal". In my last post on this matter I made reference to a quote by Adolph Hitler. I want to post it again, being as it is quite fitting to the mindset of the bleating sheep.

All propaganda has to be popular and has to accommodate itself to the comprehension of the least intelligent of those whom it seeks to reach.

I have found that there are three "stock answers" that are given when questioned about their loyalty to an organization so massive and corrupt.

1. "I have been a practicing Catholic for _____ years, gone to church every Sunday, and I have never experienced anything like what they are accusing our priests of. This is just another example of them trying to destroy our faith."

2. "So there are a few 'bad priests'. Show me an organization that doesn't have problems. My priest/pastor is a good man, so it doesn't effect me."

but THIS one is my favorite...

3. "There are molesters everywhere. They are in our school systems, other churches, and our governments. The only reason they are attacking Catholics is because they are looking for a reason to destroy us. Look at that teacher that molested that boy, she was a public school teacher, but no one attacked public education the way they are attacking us. Plenty of other religions have problems with this too, we aren't any different."

Every time I hear one of these, or similar responses, it makes my eyes glaze over and I lose ten IQ points. Having a discussion with a Catholic about the corruption and history of their organization is like talking about gun control with a man who lives in a trailor and sleeps with his assault rifle under his beer stained mattress.

You can boil all three of these responses into very simple, child-like retorts.

1. "I don't care, it didn't happen to me. They are just picking on us because we are better than them."

2. "It's not that big of a deal. Leave us alone."

3. "Everyone else is doing it too! It isn't OUR fault! Stop picking on us!"

So, let's address this staggering blindness and immaturity for a minute. The one thing that I have noticed as a consistent reaction from their supporters is defensiveness. I do not understand this, at all. They feel the need to defend this organization as if it personally represents them. Their brains are that of a collective consciousness, and unable to break away and see the problem as it exists. This is not a complicated concept to grasp. This is about a systematic cover-up of continued abuse at the hands of their leaders. This is NOT about the amount of priests who offend. This is NOT about having one religion pitted against another. This is NOT about how many sex offenders there are in other groups and organizations. This is about betrayal and self preservation of big business at the cost of our children.

One thing that has been overlooked throughout this scandal, is the amount of women and men who have been raped by their priests. This is not something that is happening only to our children, but to anyone perceived as weaker and able to be controlled and manipulated by those who hold power within the ranks of the Catholic church.

Rape, molestation and sexual assault are about power. What grants more power to a person than the ability to control a belief system that dictates their victim's everyday lives? They creep into every crack and crevice within their minds and hearts and this behavior renders the victim as helpless. Therefore, every act committed by the one in power is seen as "guidance and love"...even rape. That, in itself, is an apalling abuse of power. Then you combine that with a system that buries these offenses "for the good of the church", and you have a breeding ground for EVERY SINGLE PERSON affiliated with this organization to be placed directly in harm's way.

Yet, much like the abused cult follower, they cannot and WILL NOT accept and aknowledge simple facts. I can only think that it is part of the indoctrination process to create followers that see "outsiders" as simply attacking them without cause. Their denial runs so deep that they cannot even see the dangers to their own children.

The difference between "those other religions and organizations" and the Vatican, is that they do not hold the financial and political power of the Vatican. They do not have the financial resources or ability to evade the law because of sheer numbers and immunity under the laws. Our public school systems are NOT sovereign states. They are subject to harsh and applicable laws when caught offending. The Catholic church is not. You are aware of molesters in our schools and in other faiths because they have been splattered all over our news media when they are ARRESTED AND IMPRISONED! You are NOT made aware of Catholic priests and nuns for the same reason. The intent of the Vatican is to shroud every accusation in controversy. It is a system of "we are looking into it" conbined with gross denail of the acts. How is this acceptable to people who have placed such trust and support behind them? These same people would be flailing their arms in rage over a similar accusation brought against a non secular member of their community. So much for God-like forgiveness to anyone viewed as an "outsider".

The future Pope Benedict XVI resisted pleas to defrock a California priest with a record of sexually molesting children, citing concerns including "the good of the universal church," according to a 1985 letter bearing his signature.

The letter, signed by then-Cardinal Joseph Ratzinger, was typed in Latin and is part of years of correspondence between the Diocese of Oakland and the Vatican about the proposed defrocking of the Rev. Stephen Kiesle.

The Vatican confirmed Friday that it was Ratzinger's signature. "The press office doesn't believe it is necessary to respond to every single document taken out of context regarding particular legal situations," the Rev. Federico Lombardi said.

The diocese recommended removing Kiesle (KEEZ'-lee) from the priesthood in 1981, the year Ratzinger was appointed to head the Vatican office that shared responsibility for disciplining abusive priests.

The case then languished for four years at the Vatican before Ratzinger finally wrote to Oakland Bishop John Cummins. It was two more years before Kiesle was removed; during that time he continued to do volunteer work with children through the church.

In the November 1985 letter, Ratzinger says the arguments for removing Kiesle are of "grave significance" but added that such actions required very careful review and more time.

But the future pope also noted that any decision to defrock Kiesle must take into account the "good of the universal church" and the "detriment that granting the dispensation can provoke within the community of Christ's faithful, particularly considering the young age." Kiesle was 38 at the time.

Kiesle had been sentenced in 1978 to three years' probation after pleading no contest to misdemeanor charges of lewd conduct for tying up and molesting two young boys in a San Francisco Bay area church rectory.

Here is where I would like you to pause, and pay attention. Fr. Kiesle received a slap on the wrist for molestation and then was returned to the priesthood for nine more years, with full access to chldren....

As his probation ended in 1981, Kiesle asked to leave the priesthood and the diocese submitted papers to Rome to defrock him.

California church officials wrote to Ratzinger at least three times to check on the status of Kiesle's case and Cummins discussed the case with officials during a Vatican visit, according to correspondence. At one point, a Vatican official wrote to say the file may have been lost and suggested resubmitting materials.

As Kiesle's fate was being weighed in Rome, the priest returned to suburban Pinole to volunteer as a youth minister at St. Joseph Church, where he had served as associate pastor from 1972 to 1975.

Kiesle was ultimately stripped of his priestly powers on Feb. 13, 1987, though the documents do not indicate how or why. They also don't say what role — if any — Ratzinger had in the decision.

Now, here is where I challenge you to defend the acts, or lack thereof, of your sitting Pope...

Kiesle, who married after leaving the priesthood, was arrested and charged in 2002 with 13 counts of child molestation from the 1970s. All but two were thrown out after the U.S. Supreme Court struck down as unconstitutional a California law extending the statute of limitations.

He pleaded no contest in 2004 to a felony for molesting a young girl in his Truckee home in 1995 and was sentenced to six years in state prison.

Kiesle, now 63 and a registered sex offender, lives in a Walnut Creek gated community, according to his address listed on the Megan's Law sex registry. An AP reporter was turned away when attempting to reach him for comment.

More than a half-dozen victims reached a settlement in 2005 with the Oakland diocese alleging Kiesle had molested them as young children.

"He admitted molesting many children and bragged that he was the Pied Piper and said he tried to molest every child that sat on his lap," said Lewis VanBlois, an attorney for six Kiesle victims who interviewed the former priest in prison. "When asked how many children he had molested over the years, he said 'tons.'"

And now...the dance of denial from the cult of the holier than thou....

Documents obtained by the AP last week revealed similar instances of Vatican stalling in cases involving two Arizona clergy.

In one case, the future pope took over the abuse case of the Rev. Michael Teta of Tucson, Ariz., then let it languish at the Vatican for years despite repeated pleas from the bishop for the man to be removed from the priesthood.

In the second, the bishop called Msgr. Robert Trupia a "major risk factor" in a letter to Ratzinger. There is no indication in those files that Ratzinger responded.

The Vatican has called the accusations "absolutely groundless" and said the facts were being misrepresented.

I beg to differ, I think that Fr. Kiesle provides the "ground". These are FACTS, people, not rumors or unsubstantiated claims. They are FACTS. How many priests like Fr. Kiesel have to be unearthed before you aknowledge that the organization that you so lovingly support has betrayed you? What will it take for you to step back and realize that in order to keep your faith as the pillar of morality (cough cough) you MUST demand erradication of molesters and rapists within your church?

As long as you continue to view this as an "us against them" dynamic, you are actually placing your church under much worse fire than if you demand that they do the right thing, and bad PR be damned. The Catholic church must make a stand and show that this behavior will not be tolerated, and they may just gain the respect of outsiders like myself. They must send a clear and concise message that their churches are no place for deviants to lurk, prey and find sanctuary. Unfortunately for you, their dutiful minions, they refuse to do so. So, I suppose that you will go down with the ship. What a sad place it must be to live inside your minds. I cannot imagine the ability to rationalize away the betrayal in these circumstances.

There have been countless jokes and parodies made in reference to the "child molesting Catholic priests". It is a sad reflection of our culture, in my opinion.

"I read this in the paper this morning: New York City has a priest shortage. So you see, there is some good news in the world. ... To give you an idea how bad it is, earlier today in Brooklyn an alter boy had to grope himself." —David Letterman

"As you've probably heard, the Pope has asked all the Cardinals to return to Rome. You know how they got them all to come back? They told them that there was going to be a performance by the Vienna Boys Choir." —Jay Leno

"The Supreme Court ruled today that virtual child pornography is legal. Finally, some good news for the church." —Jay Leno

"Kids, if you see an ad that says Cardinals looking for a bat boy, watch out, that has nothing to do with the baseball team." —Jay Leno

A priest and a lawyer are walking down the street and see a small boy eating an ice cream. The priest says, "How'd you like to fuck that?" To which the lawyer replied, "Out of what?"

Do you want the jokes to stop? I know that I do, and I don't share your faith. Here's an idea, instead of supporting and defending them, demand a thorough housecleaning, starting with the golden palace. If your church is what you claim it is, it will survive and be renewed. If not, then there is always Jonestown, Heaven's gate, Waco, Branch Dividians, The Solar Temple, or any other Kool-aid drinking, child molesting cult.

Just imagine if Jim Jones had accumulated the power of The Vatican.

One final quote for you...

“Subtlety may deceive you; integrity never will.” Oliver Goldsmith

I guess Ol' Jimmy Jones just lacked the necessary subtlety....

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100409/ap_on_re_us/us_pope_church_abuse

....and again....

2010-04-04T11:33:00.006-04:00

"With this spirit today we rally close around you, successor to (St.) Peter, bishop of Rome, the unfailing rock of the holy church," Sodano said. "Holy Father, on your side are the people of God, who do not allow themselves to be influenced by the petty gossip of the moment, by the trials which sometimes buffet the community of believers."

TRANSLATION

Limbaugh asks Miss America contestants: "Ours is a world governed by the aggressive use of force. Do you accept that?"

answer: "Sometimes war is inevitable"

Oh...wow. For once in my life, I agree with a woman who puts Vaseline on her teeth. If you are puzzled by how I see those two statements as a translation for the statement made by the cardinal, you didn't read it closely enough. His statement is one of "it's us against them." Well sir, when you use statements like, "petty gossip", when referencing participation in sexual assault of children, it is a war that you will beckon. What is the use of aggressive force in regard to his statement? It is guilt, used in combination with commanding loyalty. It is classic passive aggressive behavior. This has been a tool on the belt of clergy for as long as they have existed. They command the war, and then wash their hands of it, and "pray" for it to come to an end.

"Especially with you in these days are those 400,000 priests who generously serve the people of God, in parishes, recreation centers, schools, hospitals and many other places, as well as in the missions in the most remote parts of the world," the cardinal said.

TRANSLATION

If you've been victimized by clergy, please know that you are not alone. You can get better. You can reach out to others who've been hurt just like you have. Together, we can heal one another.

We are SNAP, the Survivors Network of those Abused by Priests. We are the nation's largest, oldest and most active support group for women and men wounded by religious authority figures (priests, ministers, bishops, deacons, nuns and others). We are an independent and confidential organization,

OH SNAP! My Brothas and sistas in GAWD....looks like a war you shall have! 400,000 strong, eh? Not good, boys....not good at all. You clearly do not understand the ripple effect of harm placed upon the youth within our communities. You look confused, allow me to put it in terms you can understand...

But Jesus called them to him, saying, “Let the children come to me, and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of God."

For those of you wearing the red dresses, this DOES NOT mean to place your dick in their mouth! You seem to be confused. It also mentions something about sodomy somewhere in that great book of yours. Hey, if you like things up your ass, good for you, who am I to judge. BUT that 7 year old child does not want, nor does god require you to put anything up their ass. Was that too harsh for some of you? Does the thought of a grown man in a black dress placing his hands, tongue, penis, or any other appendage in or on a young boy in a white dress bother you? I hope it does. I also hope that is the visual you have in your head each and every time you tithe.

Their power comes from YOU, not god. Their ability to victimize and then lie comes from your simple need to have the answers to "why".

Benedict singled out the "trials and sufferings" of Christians in Iraq and Pakistan, noting that these believers have risked persecution and death for their faith. He urged hope for the people of Haiti and Chile, devastated by earthquakes. He said Easter could "signal the victory of peaceful coexistence and respect" in crime-ravaged areas of Latin American countries plagued by drug trafficking and said he would pray for peace in the Middle East.

TRANSLATION

All great movements are popular movements. They are the volcanic eruptions of human passions and emotions, stirred into activity by the ruthless Goddess of Distress or by the torch of the spoken word cast into the midst of the people.

OR THIS

All propaganda has to be popular and has to accommodate itself to the comprehension of the least intelligent of those whom it seeks to reach.

OR THIS

Any alliance whose purpose is not the intention to wage war is senseless and useless.

Who is the origin of those three quotes? Adolph Hitler.

The pope will "pray for peace in the Middle East". huh. That's kinda ironic, don't ya think? I mean, how stupid do you have to be in order to find solice in the idea of prayer ceasing a war started by a self professed Christian?

Sunday's edition of the Vatican newspaper L'Osservatore Romano denounced the accusations against the pope as a "vile defamation operation."

TRANSLATION

"Oh Lord, help me! It is false. I am clear. For my life now lies in your hands...."

That quote? It is from the tombstone of Rebecca Nurse, hanged as a witch in 1692.

"Ye are all against me..."

Martha Corey, hanged 1692

"...I am wronged. It is a shameful thing that
you should mind these folks that are out of
their wits."

Martha Carrier, hanged 1692

So, Pope Ratfucker, what size is your tie? You come from a long line of people corrupted by beliefs in fairy tales. You have descended from those who denied the corruption and political motive of their so called faith. Those just like you have perpetrated inhuman acts against the members of their communities. The victims of this religious zealotry were not heard...they were killed. I think, in light of the current situation, the least you could do, is step down. You are no innocent man being victimized by those who oppose you. You are at the very heart of an organization that has victimized thousands of innocent followers. I do not care for your pleas of innocence anymore than those like you cared for the pleas of the innocent.

Dressed in gold robes and shielded from a cool drizzle by a canopy, Benedict looked weary as he listened to Sodano's speech at the start of Mass in the cobblestone square bedecked with daffodils, tulips and azaleas.

TRANSLATION

The Master Manipulator

Let us look for a moment at how some of this manifests in the cult leader. Cult leaders have an
outstanding ability to charm and win over followers. They beguile and seduce. They enter a room and garner all the attention. They command the utmost respect and obedience. These are "individuals whose narcissism is so extreme and grandiose that they exist in a kind of splendid isolation in which the creation of the grandiose self takes precedence over legal, moral or interpersonal commitments."(l8) Paranoia may be evident in simple or elaborate delusions of persecution. Highly suspicious, they may feel conspired against, spied upon or cheated, or maligned by a person, group, or governmental agency. Any real or suspected unfavorable reaction may be interpreted as a deliberate attack upon them or the group. (Considering the criminal nature of some groups and the antisocial behavior of others, some of these fears may have more of a basis in reality than delusion!)

Harder to evaluate, of course, is whether these leaders' belief in their magical powers, omnipotence, and connection to God (or whatever higher power or belief system they are espousing) is delusional or simply part of the con. Megalomania--the belief that one is able or entitled to rule the world--is equally hard to evaluate without psychological testing of the in- dividual, although numerous cult leaders state quite readily that their goal is to rule the world. In any case, beneath the surface gloss of intelligence, charm, and professed humility seethes an inner world of rage, depression, and fear.

Two writers on the subject used the label "Trust Bandit" to describe the psychopathic personality.(l9) Trust Bandit is indeed an apt descripdon of this thief of our hearts, souls, minds, bodies, and pocketbooks. Since a significant percentage of current and former cult members have been in more than one cultic group or relationship, learning to recognize the per- sonality style of the Trust Bandit can be a useful antidote to further abuse.

The Profile of a Psychopath

In reading the profile, bear in mind the three characteristics that Robert Lifton sees as common to a cultic situation:

1. A charismatic leader who...increasingly becomes the object of worship

2. A series of processes that can be associated with "coercive persuasion" or "thought reform"

3. The tendency toward manipulation from above...with exploitation--economic, sexual, or other--of often genuine seekers who bring idealism from below(20)

Based on the psychopathy checklists of Hervey Cleckley and Robert Hare, we now explore certain traits that are particularly pertinent to cult leaders. The 15 characteristics outlined below list features commonly found in those who become perpetrators of psychological and physical abuse. In the discussion we use the nomenclature "psychopath" and "cult leader" interchangeably. To illustrate these points, a case study of Branch Davidian cult leader David Koresh follows this section.

We are not suggesting that all cult leaders are psychopaths but rather that they may exhibit many of the behavioral characteristics of one. We are also not proposing that you use this checklist to make a diagnosis, which is something only a trained professional can do. We present the checklist as a tool to help you label and demystify traits you may have noticed in your leader.

Characteristics of a Cult Leader

People coming out of a cultic group or relationship often struggle with the question, "Why would anyone (my leader, my lover, my teacher) do this to me?" When the deception and exploitation become clear, the enormous unfairness of the victimization and abuse can be very difficult to accept. Those who have been part of such a nightmare often have difficulty placing the blame where it belongs--on the leader.

A cult cannot be truly explored or understood without understanding its leader. A cult's formation,
proselytizing methods, and means of control "are determined by certain salient personality characteristics of [the] cult leader....Such individuals are authoritarian personalities who attempt to compensate for their deep, intense feelings of inferiority, insecurity, and hostility by forming cultic groups primarily to attract those whom they can psychologically coerce into and keep in a passive-submissive state, and secondarily to use them to increase their income."(l)

In examining the motives and activities of these self-proclaimed leaders, it becomes painfully obvious that cult life is rarely pleasant for the disciple and breeds abuses of all sorts. As a defense against the high level of anxiety that accompanies being so acutely powerless, people in cults often assume a stance of self-blame. This is reinforced by the group's ma- manipulative messages that the followers are never good enough and are to blame for everything that goes wrong.

Demystifying the guru's power is an important part of the psyche- educational process needed to fully recover.(2) It is critical to truly gaining freedom and independence from the leader"s control. The process starts with some basic questions: Who was this person who encouraged you to view him as God, all-knowing, or all-powerful? What did he get out of this masquerade? What was the real purpose of the group (or relationship)?

In cults and abusive relationships, those in a subordinate position usually come to accept the abuse as their fault, believing that they deserve the foul treatment or that it is for their own good. They sometimes persist in believing that they are bad rather than considering that the person upon whom they are so dependent is cruel, untrustworthy, and unreliable. It is simply too frightening for them to do that: it threatens the balance of power and means risking total rejection, loss, and perhaps even death of self or loved ones.
This explains why an abused cult follower may become disenchanted with the relationship or the group yet continue to believe in the teachings, goodness, and power of the leader.

Even after leaving the group or relationship, many former devotees carry a burden of guilt and shame while they continue to regard their former leader as paternal, all-good, and godlike. This is quite common in those who "walk away" from their groups, especially if they never seek the benefits of an exit counseling or therapy to deal with cult-related issues. This same phenomenon is found in battered women and in children who are abused by their parents or other adults they admire.

To heal from a traumatic experience of this type, it is important to understand who and what the
perpetrator is. As long as there are illusions about the leader's motivation, powers, and abilities, those who have been in his grip deprive themselves of an important opportunity for growth: the chance to empower themselves, to become free of the tyranny of dependency on others for their well-being, spiritual growth, and happiness.

The Authoritarian Power Dynamic

The purpose of a cult (whether group or one-on-one) is to serve the emotional, financial, sexual, and power needs of the leader. The single most important word here is power. The dynamic around which cults are formed is similar to that of other power relationships and is essentially ultra- auhoritarian, based on a power imbalance. The cult leader by definition must have an authoritarian personality in order to fulfill his half of the power dynamic. Traditional elements of authoritarian personalities indude the following:

-the tendency to hierarchy

-the drive for power (and wealth)

-hostility, hatred, prejudice

- superficial judgments of people and events

-a one-sided scale of values favoring the one in power

-interpreting kindness as weakness

-the tendency to use people and see others as inferior

-a sadistic-masochistic tendency

-incapability of being ultimately satisfied

-paranoia(3)

In a study of twentieth-century dictators, one researcher wrote: 'Since compliance depends on whether the leader is perceived as being both powerful and knowing, the ever-watchful and all-powerful leader and his invisible but observant and powerful instruments, such as secret police) can be invoked in the same way as an unobservable but omniscient God....Similarly, the pomp and ceremony surrounding such an individual make him more admirable and less like the common herd, increasing both his self-confidence and the confidence of his subjects. The phenomenon is found not only with individual leaders, but with entire movemnts"(4)

We will see, however, that an authoritarian personality is just one aspect of the nature of a cult leader.

Who Becomes a Cult Leader?

Frequently at gatherings of former cult members a lively exchange takes place in which those present compare their respective groups and leaders. As people begin to describe their special, enlightened, and unique "guru"--be he a pastor, therapist, political leader, teacher, lover, or swami--they are quickly surprised to find that their once-revered leaders are really quite similar in temperament and personality. It often seems as if these leaders come tiom a common mold, sometimes jokingly called the "Cookie-cutter Messiah School."

These similarities between cult leaders of all stripes are in fact character disorders commonly identified with the psychopathic personality. They have been studied by psychiatrists, medical doctors, clinical psychologists, and others for more than half a century. In this chapter we review some of this research and conclude with a psychopathological profile of traits commonly found in abusive leaders.

Cultic groups usually originate with a living leader who is believed to be "god" or godlike by a cadre of dedicated believers. Along with a dra- matic and convincing talent for self-expression, these leaders have an intuitive ability to sense their followers' needs and draw them closer with promises of fulfillment.
Gradually, the leader inculcates the group with his own private ideology (or craziness!), then creates
conditions so that his victims cannot or dare not test his claims. How can you prove someone is not the Messiah? That the world won't end tomorrow? That humans are not possessed by aliens from another world or dimension? Through psychological manipulation and control, cult leaders trick their followers into believing in something, then prevent them from testing and disproving that mythology or belief system.

The Role of Charisma

In general, charismatic personalities are known for their inescapable magnetism, their winning style, the self-assurance with which they promote something--a cause, a belief, a product. A charismatic person who offers hope of new beginnings often attracts attention and a following. Over the years we have witnessed this in the likes of Dale Carnegie, Werner Erhard (founder of est, now The Forum), John Hanley (founder of Lifespring), Maharishi Mahesh Yogi, Shirley MacLaine, John Bradshaw, Marianne Williamson, Ramtha channeler J.Z. Knight, and a rash of Amway "executives," weight-loss program promoters and body-building gurus.

One dictionary definition of charisma is "a personal magic of leadership arousing special popular loyalty or enthusiasm for a public figure (as a political leader or military commander); a special magnetic charm or appeal."(5) Charisma was studied in depth by the German sociologist Max Weber, who defined it as "an exceptional quality in an individual who, through appearing to possess supernatural, providential, or extraordinary powers, succeeds in gathering disciples around him."(6)

Weber's charismatic leader was "a sorcerer with an innovative aura and a personal magnetic gift, [who] promoted a specific doctrine.... [and was] concerned with himself rather than involved with others....[He] held an exceptional type of power: it set aside the usages of normal political life and assumed instead those of demagoguery, dictatorship, or revo- lution, [which induced] men's whole-hearted devotion to the charismatic individual through a blind and fanatical trust and an unrestrained and un- critical faith."(7)

In the case of cults, of course, we know that this induction of whole hearted devotion does not happen spontaneously but is the result of the cult leader's skillful use of thought-reform techniques. Charisma on its own is not evil and does not necessarily breed a cult leader. Charisma is, however, a powerful and awesome attribute found in many cult leaders who use it in ways that are both self-serving and destructive to others. The combination of charisma and psychopathy is a lethal mixture--perhaps it is the very recipe used at the Cookie-cutter Messiah School!

For the cult leader, having charisma is perhaps most useful during the stage of cult formation. It takes a strong-willed and persuasive leader to convince people of a new belief, then gather the newly converted around him as devoted followers. A misinterpretation of the cult leader's personal charisma may also foster his followers' belief in his special or messianic qualities.

So we see that charisma is indeed a desirable trait for someone who wishes to attract a following.
However, like beauty, charisma is in the eye of the beholder. Mary, for example, may be completely taken with a par- ticular seminar leader, practically swooning at his every word, while her friend Susie doesn't feel the slightest tingle. Cehtainly at the time a person is under the sway of charisma the effect is very real. Yet, in reality, charisma does nothing more than create a certain worshipful reaction to an idealized figure in the mind of the one who is smitten.

In the long run, skills of persuasion (which may or may not be charismadc) are more important to the cult leader than charisma--for the power and hold of cults depend on the particular environment shaped by the thought-reform program and control mechanisms, all of which are usually conceptualized and put in place by the leader. Thus it is the psychopathology of the leader, not his charisma, that causes the systematic manipulative abuse and exploitation found in cults.

The Cult Leader as Psychopath

Cultic groups and relationships are formed primarily to meet specific emotional needs of the leader, many of whom suffer from one or another unotional or character disorder. Few, if any, cult leaders subject them- selves to the psychological tests or prolonged clinical interviews that allow for an accurate diagnosis.
However, researchers and clinicians who have observed these individuals describe them variously as neurotic, psychotic, on a spectrum exhibiting neurotic, sociopathic, and psychotic characteristics, or suffering from a diagnosed personality disorder.(8)

It is not our intent here to make an overarching diagnosis, nor do we intend to imply that ah cult leaders or the leaders of any of the groups mentioned here are psychopaths. In reviewing the data, however, we can surmise that there is significant psychological dysfunctioning in some cult leaders and that their behavior demonstrates features rather consistent with the disorder known as psychopathy.

Dr. Robert Hare, one of the world's foremost experts in the field, estimates that there are at least two million psychopaths in North America. He writes, "Psychopaths are social predators who charm, manipulate, and ruthlessly plow their way through life, leaving a broad trail of broken hearts, shattered expectations, and empty wallets. Completely lacking in conscience and in feelings for others, they selfishly take what they want and do as they please, violating social norms and expectations without the slightest sense of guilt or regret."(9)

Psychopathy falls within the section on personality disorders in the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, which is the standard source book used in making psychiatric evaluations and
diagnoses.(l0) In the draft version of the manual's 4th edition (to be released Spring 1994), this disorder is listed as "personality disorder not otherwise specified/Cleckley-type psychopath," named after psychiatrist Hervey Cleckley who carried out the first major studies of psychopaths. The combination of personality and behavioral traits that allows for this diagnosis must be evident in the person's history, not simply apparent during a particular episode. That is, psychopathy is a long-term personality disorder. The term psychopath is often used interchangeably with sociopath, or sociopathic personality Because it is more commonly recognized, we use the term psychopath here.

Personality disorders, as a diagnosis, relate to certain inflexible and maladaptive behaviors and traits that cause a person to have significantly impaired social or occupational functioning. Signs of this are often first manifested in childhood and adolescence, and are expressed through distorted patterns of perceiving, relating to, and thinking about the environment and oneself. In simple terms this means that something is amiss, awry, not quite right in the person, and this creates problems in how he or she relates to the rest of the world. 6

The psychopathic personality is sometimes confused with the "anti- social personality," another disorder; however, the psychopath exhibits more extreme behavior than the antisocial personality. The antisocial per- sonality is identified by a mix of antisocial and criminal behaviors--he is the common criminal. The psychopath, on the other hand, is characterized by a mix of criminal and socially deviant behavior.

Psychopathy is not the same as psychosis either. The latter is characterized by an inability to differentiate what is real from what is imagined: boundaries between self and others are lost, and critical thinking is greatly impaired. While generally not psychotic, cult leaders may experience psychotic episodes, which may lead to the destruction of themselves or the group. An extreme example of this is the mass murder-suicide that occurred in November 1978 in Tonestown, Guyana, at the People's Temple led by Jim Jones. On his orders, over 900 men,women, and children perished as Jones deteriorated into what was probably a paranoid psychosis.

The psychopathic personality has been well described by Hervey ClecMey in his classic work, The Mask of Sanity, first published in 1941 and updated and reissued in 1982. Cleckley is perhaps best known for The Three Faces of Eve, a book and later a popular movie on multiple personal- ity. Cleckley also gave the world a detailed study of the personality and behavior of the psychopath, listing 16 characteristics to be used in evaluating and treating psychopaths.(ll)

Cledde's work greatly influenced 20 years of research carried out by Robert Hare at the University of British Columbia in Vancouver. In his work developing reliable and valid procedures for assessing psychopathy, Hare made several revisions in Cleddey's list of traits and finally settled on a 20-item Psychopathy Cheddist.(l2) Later in this chapter we will use an adaptation of both the Cleddey and Hare checklists to examine the profile of a cult ieader.

Neuropsychiatrist Richard M. Restak stated, "At the heart of the di- agnosis of psychopathy was the recognition that a person could appear normal and yet dose observation would reveal the personality to be irra- tional or even violent."(l3) Indeed, initially most psychopaths appear quite normal. They present themselves to us as charming, interesting, even humble. The majority "don't suffer from delusions, hallucinations, or memory impairment, their contact with reality appears solid."(l4) Some, on the other hand, may demonstrate marked paranoia and megalomania. In one clinical study of psychopathic inpatients, the authors wroa: "We found that our psychopaths were similar to normals (in the reference group) with regard to their capacity to experience external event~ as real and with regard to their sense of bodily reality. They generally had good memory, concentration attention, and language function. They had a high barrier against external, aversive stimulation....In some ways they dearly resemble normal people and can thus 'pass' as reasonably normal or sane. Yet we found them to be extremely primitive in other ways, even more primitive than frankly schizophrenic patients. In some ways their thinking was sane and reasonable, but in others it was psychotically inefficient and/or convoluted."(l5)

Another researcher described psychopaths in this way: "These people are impulsive, unable to tolerate frustration and delay, and have problems with trusting. They take a paranoid position or externalize their emotional experience. They have little ability to form a working alliance and a poor capacity for self-observation. Their anger is frightening. Frequently they take flight. Their relations with others are highly problematic. When dose to another person they fear engulfment or fusion or loss of self. At the same time, paradoxically, they desire closeness; frustration of their entitled wishes to be nourished, cared for, and assisted often leads to rage. They are capable of a child's primitive fury enacted with an adult's physical - capabilities, and action is always in the offing.$l6)

Ultimately, "the psychopath must have what he wants, no matter what the cost to those in his way."(l7)

Go back. Read it. Listen. Think for yourselves.

http://www.anandaawareness.com/cult_leaders.html
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/eu_vatican_easter
http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/authors/a/adolf_hitler.html
http://home.texoma.net/~adwignall/stones.htm

....and the saga continues....

2010-04-04T07:31:00.005-04:00

I do not typically revisit a subject once I have spewed my opinion on the matter, but THIS one begs to be followed relentlessly. I am both laughing and disgusted by the fact that I am sitting here on Easter morning reading yet another series of "Bushisms" (thank you President Dipshit for that word!) captured for all posterity. They come at the lips of the flying monkeys that run the Vatican. This one is worthy of more attention...

Pope Benedict XVI faced fresh criticism Saturday after attacks on the Catholic Church over the paedophile priest furore were compared to anti-Semitism, further marring Easter Week celebrations.

Jewish groups and those representing victims of abuse by Catholic priests denounced the remarks by the pope's personal preacher during a Good Friday homily.

But hold on a minute, here is a shocker, THEY DENY IT!

Vatican spokesman Federico Lombardi later told AFP the comments were from "a letter read by the preacher and not the official position of the Vatican."

So, here is what I am wondering, what color smoke do the sheep see pouring from the Vatican when their self pontificating men in red dresses (insert your mind humming "Lady in Red" by Chris De Burgh) get caught breaking their cardinal rule? (pun intended).

Let's take a look at this one. A letter written by some moron, whose name I don't even care to know, was released supposedly without the approval of the Vatican. That is quite a position for them to take. This, from the organization that has managed to make wiping their own asses secretive and ritualistic. Nice try, boys. If it was allowed to be seen, you agreed with it, and supported it's content. I know that your followers are morons, they have to be to keep swallowing the shit that you shovel, but those of us with REAL free will and common sense are stunned by the unmitigated gall it takes to make a statement like that, and then try to deny it.

I will, yet again, simplify what was stated here. The Vatican has been accused of willfully covering up countless acts of sexual abuse within their ranks. Proof of these accusations and their failure to follow up appropriately has been provided. The responsibility has landed square in the lap of your current "Water Buffalo" leader. Then, instead of being forthcoming with a dose of your OWN repentance, you idiots compare people demanding justice for victims of abuse with THE HOLOCAUST! HOLY SHIT! Not only did you pull the victim card, you threw the whole fuckin deck!

So, Pope Ratfucker has clearly decided to use the Ostrich defense. He has simply shoved his head in the sand, (sand being a metaphor for his rectal cavity) and refused to aknowledge the accusations appropriately. I can only assume that he is hoping that this will all blow over. You see, folks, he can't "do the right thing" here because if he does, and he calls for the resignation and defrocking of the gulity parties, he is signing his own warrant. He is as culpable as his minions.

The pope himself faces allegations that, as archbishop of Munich and later as the Vatican's chief morals enforcer, he helped to protect predator priests.

see?

But hey, the good news is that god will guide them to the right decision through a thorough investigation. *blink* I guess god is partying it up at spring break in Orlando or some shit, because he clearly is not focused here. What happened to wrath and lightning bolts that shoot out of his ass? You mean to tell me that he is relying on a bunch of grown men who haven't had sex, (cough cough) wear red dresses and WAY too much bling to render justice here? Good lord, your god is weak. That sparks a funny thought. You Catholics get your panties all in a bunch over shit like gay parades and alternative lifestyles, all the while your leaders are parading around in drag and perfoming plays in public squares. Wow.

The Archbishop of Canterbury, meanwhile, told the BBC in a radio interview to be aired next week that the Irish Catholic Church had lost "all credibility" over its massive abuse scandal compounded by evidence of cover-ups by high-ranking prelates, the Times of London reported Saturday.

I love that one. They have lost all credibility? Ya think???? What i want to know, is where the FUCK was their "credibility" before this? Come on people, we are talking about a bunch of people who actually think that a human being controlled a massive body of water. They actually believe that some singular creature that no one had ever seen or touched created EVERYTHING. They actually believe that if they ask for something long enough, over and over again, that this creature will grant their request. They actually believe that they have found the one god who rules above all others. *blink* Credibility? WITH WHO? Oh, I know who. They may be losing credibilty with the "just in case" believers. You know who you are. You are pretty sure that everything that your religion spews is a bunch of crap, but you keep dutifully going to church and following their loosly formed rules.....just in case....they are right in the end. I get that. Guess what? It is now time to just let it go! Let me put it this way, you are MUCH more likely to get a ride on a puffy cloud with a hot angel if you DON'T follow a molester. Did that clear it up for you? No? Ok, let's try this way then, you are MORE likely to know what a flame up your ass feels like if you continue to place the word of a flawed human being over the word of your "almighty god".

"Their children shall be dashed
to pieces before their eyes!
There houses spoiled, and their
wives raped...Dash the young men
to pieces...have no pity on the
fruit of the womb, the children
shall not be spared"
-- Isa 13:16-18

...or maybe I am wrong. *blink*

Good choice in a god, idiots. The fun in all of this is that I can find another twenty passages that completely contradict this one...and every one. How do you people fit your entire cranium in your assholes?

Listen, you idiots. You can't pick and choose what rules you follow at whatever time it suits you. You either believe in god, and doing the right thing, or you don't. I simply believe in the latter. If you have nothing to fear, allow and DEMAND that your "leaders of faith" are held accountable for destroying and corrupting your most valued posession....your faith. Oh, it isn't your most valued posession? Is it your children? Your car? What is it? Come on, people...get a fucking grip! If you are following a god that does NOT condemn the acts of these men, well...you may want to look in another book or something. There ARE others, you know. They were written by men too. They are equally flawed and full of contradictions and imagry. Jesus Christ, you can find anything you want in any of them! Try this...believe in your god, if you are so sure that he exists. Believe in your ideas of right and wrong. Just PLEASE stop believing in the superiority of your position! It is your unbending need to be the "right one" that has allowed this organization to grow to a level of corruption and lawlessness that has jeopardized our children. I believe in your shit more than you do! I believe that your child is MY child..and it is my duty to protect them! I am begging you to stop and think about what your blindness is causing.

But in France the daily Liberation on Saturday carried a front page headline asking "It is time to change the pope?".

The paper concluded that while being a top theologian, Benedict XVI has demonstrated "scant political judgement during his five year pontificate and is a poor communicator, who accumulates one gaffe after another."

It doubted that the pope was up to dealing with the current crisis, saying that in the past he had shown "an incomprehension of the world as it is".

"It is down to him to respond to the expectations of his faithful and the secular world. Benedict XVI must come out of his bubble."

"an incomprehension of the world as it is" That is quite a statement. I guess this ranks right up there with the cardinal who, last week, said that he thinks that eliminating celibacy for priests would limit incidents of sexual abuse. *blink* Are there any other books or publications in the Vatican that could help shed some light on the fact that molestation and rape are NOT about sex?? After all, we have only kown that for the last 20 or 30 years. "come out of his bubble" I love that one too. If he comes "out of his bubble", he won't be the fuckin pope! For Christ's sake, his "bubble" is BULLETPROOF!

I'm dux animadverto , EGO don't postulo interpretor EGO operor non postulo interpretor quare Inquam res. Ut interesting res super res praesieo "

TRANSLATION

"I'm the commander -- see, I don't need to explain -- I do not need to explain why I say things. That's the interesting thing about being president."

Thank you, President Bush.

Holy shit. Now I am REALLY pissed that you made me say THAT!

http://news.yahoo.com/s/afp/20100403/wl_afp/vaticanpopeeaster_20100403102704

Love?

2010-04-01T19:21:00.003-04:00

As I grow older, and the grey hair creeps in, I reflect on my life and the meaning of my emotions and their origins. Hallmark has made a killing on one tiny little word. Music has been written and poetry has been born from four simple letters. L O V E.

What the hell does that word mean?

We strive to define that word instead of defining what makes us use that word. We have defined that word right into a tiny little box. We now have a societal standard for what that word reflects. The word itself has taken the power away from what it really is. So now, instead of looking for what that word symbolizes, we look for it's definition.

When you say, "I love you", does it not mean many different things in many different situations and relationships? It does in my world. When I say those words to my children, they have very different meaning than when I say them to the person that I want to lay next to at night. So why do we say them at all?

Why not say the meaning behind those words instead of taking a short cut? For centuries, poets have strived to encompass the emotions felt by two people who are overwhelmed at their flooding hearts. Why are we still impressed by "love" being likened to a flower, a storm, or even death? Why does the simple turn of phrase within a lyric, or the cliche crooning of a sensual voice still define such complex emotions?

Each and every "love" that you will experience in your life will be different. No one ever says, "I love you, for now." But yet, how often do we see that, and experience it in our own lives? To promise another person that you will feel the same fifty years from now, as you do today, is writing a check that your ass can't cash. Ok, so i lost my eloquence somewhere in that last thought, but it is the truth. We hold so tightly to that word, that we alter the definition as time passes on. We, as complex creatures, continue to change over time. Our emotions, and their triggers change as our lives become more and more developed.

Do we really continue to love the same people in the same way throughout the years? No. I have heard people say that "their love has grown even deeper" throughout the years. Has it? Maybe you have simply lowered the standards, or forgotten what that meant all those years ago. I know that all of the Hallmark store frequenters are thinking that I am somehow jaded or misunderstanding what love is. I beg to differ. I am honest, both with myself, and the people in my life that, for now, hold my heart. I also feel that if YOU think that you have the ability to define "love", you are selling short the greatest capacity of the human heart and mind.

I do not seek to define that word. Love exists in many forms, and changes with the wind. So, what does it mean when two people are never separated, not by time, not by distance, or by circumstance? Think about that. I said, circumstance. How easy is it to dismiss "love" when the "planets do not align", and allow "love" to be experienced by conventional means? Does the emotion, or the word take on less meaning? According to Hallmark, it does.

Can a "love" like that remain constant?

I think that it has a better chance of survival than a love that has been defined, contracted, and stamped with an official state seal....you know...a marriage license.

We are complex, why do we need to simplify the greatest abilty that we possess? Can it last forever? I believe that it can, but only if not suffocated by the restraints that our minds put on our hearts.

We need to allow "love" to take it's natural course, whether met with success or failure, if allowed to define itself, it is now, was then, and always will be pure. Stop being so afraid to allow love to be pure. "True love" may NOT be forever, but is an amazing gift if allowed to exist in the moment it chooses.

I DO believe in true love. It exists only when not strangled by our need to control and define it. When one person truly loves another, there is very little that can be said to accurately express or define it. When you have found the definition, you have strangled it's purity.

I choose to love. I love for today...not the promise of tomorrow. If love stays with me, it is because it chose to...not because I forced it to. Yes, I see love as something completely, and utterly out of human control.

Do you know when you love someone? It is when you say, "I love you", and yet you have NO IDEA what that means.

Do yourself a favor...leave it be. Let love be exactly what it is....the moment. Live for that, not for achieving what you think the definition is.

Will it last forever? It will. We destroy it with expectations and demands, both on ourselves and the ones that we say that we love.

So, I will say, "I love you"...and shrug my shoulders, simply because I do not dare try to cage the greatest feeling I have ever known. I use those words simply because i have yet to find ones less threatening.

And you wonder why the word is only four small letters for such a complex feeling....when overwhelmed by love, do you not sigh? Funny...the expression is not even a "word".

Earth to Catholics!

2010-03-20T09:08:00.003-04:00

Did you know that, statistically, your child is safer left alone on a street corner than in the "safety" of a Catholic church? We, as parents, fear the loss or harm of our child above all else. You worry continually about their safety and well being, to the point of sleepless nights. We teach our children to not talk to, or accept anything from strangers. We teach them to avoid situations that can place them directly in harm's way. We routinely check websites like "Megan's Law" to be informed as to where the dangers lie. Then, you drop them off at your local church and feel that they are safe and loved.

So I have to ask you, how far up your ass does your head have to be to NOT see the inherent dangers here? How many times do we, as a society, have to hear about acts of sexual assault, molestation and rape within the Catholic church before you morons get it? Now pull your bunched panties out of your ass, and settle down. I am NOT attacking your faith, or your choice of being a dutiful Catholic. I am attacking your idiocy as a parent. How is it, that after this many years and incidents of gross negligence on the part of the Catholic church, that you just can not see what is right under your noses? How can you NOT see that the very structure of your religion is a breeding ground for the socially backward and deviants that lurk in the primordial ooze of our society?

Your "church" consists of gaggles of men and women who, for some unknown reason, have devoted their entire lives to "spreading the word of god". Very interresting concept, don't you think? You have faith in your god, so what separates you from the men and women who enter the priesthood and convent? Your faith just isn't as strong as theirs? Did you not "receive the call"? Why not? Are you, somehow, less valuable in your god's eyes? Maybe you did not have the additional pressures from your parents to join the church. Maybe you just didn't take your catechism classes quite as seriously as some of your classmates. Maybe you had a desire to be loved and have a family that consists of real and tangible beings, you know, humans. But maybe, just maybe, you aren't a child molesting deviant who requires protection from the largest and most powerful organization in the world.

Now, I understand that every religion has the need to ritual and practice. Feel free to enjoy the ceremonial drinking of wine and devouring of styrofoam as symbolism for eating your great diety. Feel free to sit, stand, kneel, bow and genuflect before a wooden cross bearing the tortured figure of a man. Feel free to spew your "sins" to a man who hides behind a closed window. Feel free to build obnoxious structures that display your wealth to your competetion, all the while consuming public, tax free land. But can you explain one thing to me, please?

Why do you continue to leave your children in the care of someone who has never raised a child? Why do you continue to leave your child in the care of someone that, for all practical purposes, has ABSOLUTELY NO way of you checking their past, their qualifications, licensing, or clearances to be educating and caring for your child? Holy shit, people, you amaze me! When you look for a daycare facility to care for your child, would you NOT check those things? When your child enters school, do you NOT make sure that the teachers, caregivers and staff employed within that building have the proper documentation and clearances to have access to your child? Do you NOT check the qualifications and backgrounds of their coaches, youth leaders, and mentors? No? Well, there is the problem, I suppose.

If you answered, "OF COURSE!" to any of those questions, then what the hell is wrong with you? Why would you, for one minute, consider leaving your most precious responsibility in the hands of someone that has NOT been able to meet those criteria? I know the answer already. Frankly, it makes me sick. You do this because you truly believe that these people are somehow closer you your god than you are. They are "good people" who are spreading your faith to those who YOU have determined require it. You read, and hear about these incidents of sexual abuse time after time, and yet, somehow, believe that it won't happen to you in YOUR church. Guess what, dipshit, IT CAN! Why would you take that chance? Your priests, nuns, bishops and funny hat wearing clowns are PEOPLE! They are NOT gods. They are NOT better than you. They are people! You are trusting PEOPLE with no searchable background with your child!

You are questioning why I continue to use phrases like "no searchable background" and "no clearances", aren't you? You are pathetic. This organization that you have so trustingly joined has been at the center of covering up and denying the abuse among their ranks for decades. How can one face the laws when the laws don't apply to them? How can they face justice when there are hundreds of people just like them aiding the the cover up of what they have done? Why would they do that? They do it to preserve their "holier than thou" position in the world. They do it to preserve their memberships and cash flow. They do it because they are PEOPLE making money hand over fist off of the control and brainwashing of their followers! They do it because they hold great political and social power that yeilds their ability to infect more and more people with their "word", thus yielding more cash flow.

You are paying membership dues to an organization that covers up aggregious acts commited by their officials. You are paying membership dues to an organization that harbors known molesters and rapists, and they do it in the name of god. If that doesn't bother you, then you are no better than they are.

I would no sooner leave my child in the care of a Catholic priest or nun than I would leave my child in the care of a known child molesting polygamist. Funny, I found these two articles side by side this morning....read....enjoy....and see if you can detect the problem here...

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/eu_church_abuse_pope

VATICAN CITY – Pope Benedict XVI rebuked Irish bishops Saturday for "grave errors of judgment" in handling clerical sex abuse and ordered an investigation into the Irish church but did not mention any Vatican responsibility.

In a letter to the Irish faithful read across Europe amid a growing, multination abuse scandal, the pope doled out no specific punishments to bishops blamed by victims, and Irish government-ordered investigations, for having covered up abuse of thousands of Irish children from the 1930s to the 1990s.

Ireland's main group of clerical-abuse victims, One in Four, said it was deeply disappointed by the letter because it failed to lay blame with the Vatican for what it called a "deliberate policy of the Catholic Church at the highest levels to protect sex offenders, thereby endangering children."

"If the church cannot acknowledge this fundamental truth, it is still in denial," the group said.

The letter directly addressed only Ireland, but the Vatican said it could be read as applying to other countries. Hundreds of new allegations of abuse have recently come to light across Europe, including in the pope's native Germany, where he served as archbishop in a diocese where several victims have recently come forward. One priest suspected of molesting boys while the future pope was in charge was transferred to a job where he abused more children.

While a cardinal at the Vatican, Joseph Ratzinger penned a letter instructing bishops around the world to report all cases of abuse to his office and keep them secret under threat of excommunication. Irish bishops have said the letter was widely understood to mean they shouldn't report the cases to police.

"You have suffered grievously and I am truly sorry," Benedict said, addressing himself to Irish Catholics who suffered "sinful and criminal" abuse at the hands of priests, brothers and nuns and a botched response by their superiors.

"It is understandable that you find it hard to forgive or be reconciled with the church," he said. "In her name, I openly express the shame and remorse that we all feel."

Benedict used his harshest words for the abusers themselves, saying they had betrayed the trust of the faithful, brought shame on the church and now must answer before God and civil authorities.

"Conceal nothing," he exhorted them. "Openly acknowledge your guilt, submit yourselves to the demands of justice, but do not despair of God's mercy."

Benedict faulted their superiors, the Irish bishops, for having failed "sometimes grievously" to apply the church's own law which calls for harsh punishments for child abusers, including defrocking priests.

But he didn't rebuke them specifically for having failed to report cases of abuse to police, saying only that serious mistakes were made and that now they must prevent future abuse and "continue to cooperate with civil authorities."

"I recognize how difficult it was to grasp the extent and complexity of the problem, to obtain reliable information and to make the right decisions in the light of conflicting expert advice," Benedict wrote.

"Nevertheless, it must be admitted that grave errors of judgment were made and failures of leadership occurred. And this has seriously undermined your credibility and effectiveness."

While the letter doled out no punishment for the bishops, the pope did order a Vatican investigation into some dioceses, seminaries and religious orders. Such a move is undertaken only when Rome considers a local church unable to deal with a problem on its own. The Vatican ordered such an "apostolic visitation" into U.S. seminaries after the U.S. clerical sex abuse scandal exploded in 2002.

The results of the Irish investigation could lead to further action.

Victims have been demanding that bishops resign, and three Irish bishops have offered to step down. Benedict hasn't accepted the resignations.

Asked why there were no punitive provisions in the letter, Vatican spokesman the Rev. Federico Lombardi noted that the letter was pastoral, not administrative or disciplinary in nature, and that any further measures concerning resignations would be taken by the competent Vatican offices.

Cardinal Sean Brady, the top cardinal in Ireland who himself is under fire for not reporting a notorious abuser to police, welcomed the letter.

"Let us pray that the Holy Father's pastoral letter will be the beginning of a great season of rebirth and hope in the Irish Church," he said.

Three Irish government-ordered investigations published from 2005 to 2009 have documented how thousands of Irish children suffered rape, molestation and other abuse by priests in their parishes and by nuns and brothers in boarding schools and orphanages. Irish bishops did not report a single case to police until 1996 after victims began to sue the church.

The reports have faulted Rome for sending confusing messages to the Irish church about norms to be followed and, in general, for what it called the absence of a coherent set of canon laws and rules to apply in cases of abuse.

In particular, the so-called Murphy report faulted the 2001 secrecy letter penned by then-Cardinal Ratzinger, who headed the Congregation for the Doctrine of the Faith for a quarter-century before becoming pope, making him the most informed Vatican official about the global scale of clerical abuse.

In that role, he denounced the "filth" in the priesthood and initiated what has amounted to a crackdown on predatory priests, demanding a policy of zero tolerance from his bishops. As pope, he has met with American, Australian and Canadian victims of abuse, offering them comfort and apologies.

Nevertheless, reports emerged last week that while he was archbishop of Munich in the 1980s, Ratzinger approved therapy for a priest suspected of molesting boys. The priest was then transferred to a job where he later abused more children. He was convicted in a criminal trial. The archdiocese has said Ratzinger's then vicar general took full responsibility for the transfer.

Lombardi defended Benedict in his handling of the global abuse scandal and said anyone who knows the pontiff's background and history would know he has been a "witness for coherence and correctness" in confronting abuse and a "guide to overcome a past of silence."

Lombardi was peppered with questions about why the German-born pope didn't directly address the German scandal or take the opportunity of the letter to make a more sweeping commentary on the now-global dimensions of the scandal.

Lombardi acknowledged the other cases but said the Irish scandal was unique in its scope. But he said that obviously issues in the letter could be read to apply to other countries and individuals.

"You can't talk about the entire world every time," he said. "It risks becoming banal."

The head of the German bishops' conference, Archbishop Robert Zollitsch, said the letter was a message also for Germany.

"The sexual abuse scandal in Ireland is not just an Irish problem, it is the scandal of the church in many places, it is the scandal of the church in Germany," he said.

A prominent German Catholic activist group, We Are Church, said it respected the pope's efforts with the letter.

But it faulted him for failing to address the fact that abuse is a global and structural problem for the church. "It would be good if there would be a mea culpa from him for all victims around the globe," said spokesman Christian Weisner.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100320/ap_on_re_us/us_polygamist_trial;_ylt=AtGbyKiRkEOavUPkrC95On1bbBAF;_ylu=X3oDMTM4NHRyYmltBGFzc2V0A2FwLzIwMTAwMzIwL3VzX3BvbHlnYW1pc3RfdHJpYWwEY2NvZGUDbW9zdHBvcHVsYXIEY3BvcwM0BHBvcwM0BHNlYwN5bl90b3Bfc3RvcmllcwRzbGsDbWVtYmVyb2Z0ZXhh

SAN ANGELO, Texas – The latest member of a polygamist group whose sprawling West Texas ranch was raided in 2008 has been sentenced to 75 years in prison for sexual assault of a child.

Thirty-five-year-old Merril Leroy Jessop was sentenced Friday. Jurors earlier this week also found he violated Texas laws prohibiting bigamy.

Prosecutors say Jessop tried to delete photos and other documents connecting him to an underage bride.

Jessop is the fourth member of the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints to be tried since authorities raided and seized documents from the Yearning For Zion Ranch. The weeklong raid temporarily sent 439 children to foster care.

The Texas attorney general's office says eight more group members are awaiting trial.

75 years? Wow, and yet....where are the Catholic priests? Tomorrow is Sunday, go ask yours. Good luck.

UH OH.....

2010-02-03T21:42:00.003-05:00

This is a product sold and advertized for birth control....

The common side effects reported by NuvaRing® users are:

Vaginal infections and irritation
Vaginal secretion
Headache
Weight gain
Nausea
In addition to the risks and side effects listed above, users of combination hormonal birth control methods have reported the following side effects:

Vomiting
Change in appetite
Abdominal cramps and bloating
Breast tenderness or enlargement
Irregular vaginal bleeding or spotting
Changes in menstrual cycle
Temporary infertility after treatment
Fluid retention (edema)
Spotty darkening of the skin, particularly on the face
Rash
Weight changes
Depression
Intolerance to contact lenses
Nervousness
Dizziness
Loss of scalp hair

Did you catch all of that? Here, let me help you again....just in case you do not want to get pregnant, you should try this shit.

Vaginal infections and irritation

Well look on the bright side. You DEFINITELY will NOT get pregnant, due to your partner not being able to get past the smell....yeah, I said it.

Vaginal secretion

This kind of goes with the infection thingy, right? Yeah...exactly.

Headache

FINALLY, the "I have a headache" thing will ACTUALLY be effective in preventing multiple Catholic pregnancies! YAY!

Weight gain

Guess what else causes weight gain! PREGNANCY! Uh oh, sound like you are fucked either way.

Nausea

"sorry, honey. I just can't tonight. The thought of having your child makes me want to hurl!"

Vomiting

"SEE? I TOLD you, but nooooooo, you just had to give it a go, huh?"

Change in appetite

I am guessing that by "changes" they mean....WEIGHT GAIN!

Abdominal cramps and bloating

What, you don't want to have sex with your abdomen feeling like it is in a vice grip? You sure?

Breast tenderness or enlargement

This one just made every man think this shit is a good idea! Nice going, assholes.

Irregular vaginal bleeding or spotting

Could be difficult to schedule, oh, YOUR LIFE around this one, don't ya think?

Changes in menstrual cycle

by "changes", they must mean fucked up. Come on people, just say it how it is already!

Temporary infertility after treatment

um....this IS birth control, right? Bah, stop your complaining, just because you didn't want children at 19, doesn't mean that you can just go having them at 30! Holy hell.

Fluid retention (edema)

not good! The good news is, this same company markets a diuretic! ;)Good preparation, guys. Well played.

Spotty darkening of the skin, particularly on the face

Well, you won't get pregnant, but we have more bad news, you could possibly look like the aliens in that terrible TV show, "V". That's not so bad....

Rash

one question....WHERE???

Weight changes

I am just going to take a stab in the dark here...um...going UP??? I am guessing so, with fluid retention and all, but MAYBE you will puke up everything you eat, and it will all even out. Good luck.

Depression

Oh shit, fat, bloated, splotchy face...and then you are going to get depressed? Jesus Christ, they should just sell you a loaded rifle!

Intolerance to contact lenses

*blank stare* WTF.... more explanation is required here....

Nervousness

Is this a nice way of saying your heart will race? I bet it is.

Dizziness

Greeeeeat, this will go well with the nausea thing...like peas and carrots...

Loss of scalp hair

I was hoping "bald" would make the top ten, unfortunately...dead last. Just a thought...only SCALP hair? One would think ALL hair...go figure. You will still have to wax. That sucks.

OK, so this is what I am thinking. What the FUCK???? I am becoming more and more in favor of NOT being lazy, and using a fuckin rubber! Jesus Christ, people. If it is THAT important, maybe you shouldn't "cut corners". I am just saying....

you know what the side effect of THAT is? Latex allergy. That's it. If you have it, use a different kind. Holy fuck. I don't care HOW MUCH HE doesn't want to wear it because it might be "less sensation"....you want a sensation asshole???? TRY CHILDBIRTH!

End rant.

What inspires?

2010-01-17T10:06:00.002-05:00

"What inspires?" is a question that has rattled around in my mind for as long as I can remember. We read poetry that inspires. We hear tales of success and survival, and they inspire. We set goals and determine desires, and the end result inspires. But what does that really mean? How do we determine what or who is worthy of providing inspiration? Is it a mere feeling that is invoked by the ryhthm of a musical composition? Is it the words, and the tale that is told? Is it the inflection in the voice of a narrator telling a tale of survival? Is it simply human empathy that allows the words, or actions to trigger feelings of "inspiration"?

In my world, for something, or someone to be "inspirational", action must be generated. To put it simply, if you hear something, or read something, or know someone, and you get "that feeling" from their words or actions....yet you do nothing as a result....there has not been true inspiration. Your reaction was simply one of empty emotional response triggered by chemicals that stain the neutrons in the brain. True inspiration requires action.

So, here is my action. I, fairly recently, had the pleasure of becoming the friend of a man who has the power to inspire. However, I feel in my heart, that he is unaware of the power that he holds. He did not rescue an old lady from a burning building. He did not break any world records. He has not given his limbs and his mind in service of his country. He has merely survived. He has survived human weakness, chance of birth, and hatred.

If you would indulge me, for just a moment, I would be grateful. I want you to visualize a small boy, growing up in a vast world. Visualize his clothes, the broad smile on his face, and the streaks of tears on his cheeks when he scrapes his knee on the front steps. He runs into the house, and into the arms of his adoring mother. She sees a future leader in his eyes. She smiles with pride at this new life just waiting to show the world what he is made of. He looks up at her, and never realizes that one day, she will be gone from him. Time seems to stand still, and becoming a "grown up" is millions of ticks on a clock away. He is every child. He is you, and me. His life is just beginning, and he has no idea what the future holds. He has even less of a concept of what the concept of "future" even means. All he cares about is the new record that he can not wait to tear open and hear. He hears the music, and it makes him dance, sing, and dream. His whole world is set to music. He hears the sounds of laughter, and they are the future tones and verses of the music that he dreams to create.

But then, life begins to happen. As we all know, life can be cruel. It can take a child, full of innocence and wide eyed dreams, and make them a bitter and devastated old fool. How easily that can happen in a world full of pain, hate, and a lack of understanding that we are all born exactly the same.

What child did you imagine? Was he a blonde, curly haired, blue eyed boy with denim pants and his favorite team jersey on? Did you see the faces of your own children? Did you go back in time, and see yourself? What dreams have eluded you due to the trappings of life?

I want to ask you if you envisioned a black, homosexual, recovered drug addict. No? Well, that is the adult version of that child. What was once a happy, and innocent child became a man riddled with pain. Life throws us some pretty vicious curve balls. It is difficult to be a black man in our society. It is even more difficult to be a homosexual man in our society. It is painful to lose a loved one, but even more painful to lose the one person who TRULY understood who you are. When that person is gone, a part of you dies too. Only a man of true heart and strength could overcome the pain of having his life planned for him, without say in what society determined him to be. Is it any wonder that someone like him would turn to substance abuse to escape the pain of loss, hatred and broken dreams? What part do WE play in who he became?

So now, I want you to picture an adult man standing alone in a room with hundreds of thousands of fingers pointing at him. I want you to hear hundreds of thousands of voices screaming the words, NIGGER! FAGGOT! HOMO! JUNGLE BUNNY! REJECT! CRACKHEAD! LOSER! YOU DON'T MATTER!

Then I want you to be that man. I want you to look around that room for the one person that you just KNOW will hold you and make it all go away. She isn't there. She is dead. You are all alone. The relationships that you have, are the ones that you have made alone. Those faces are few and far between the pointing fingers and the hateful words.

Would you have the strength to come back from your own weaknesses and accept that you were born to be better than this? Would you have the courage to fight through that crowd and come out on the other side? I don't know if I could. It takes unimaginable strength to survive, not what others do to us, but what we do to ourselves. It takes looking deep inside and finding that weakness, and making that change. Now, what if you are unable to change who you are, by birth. Would you allow that to become your excuse for remaining bitter, hateful, and allowing the pain to consume you? It would be so easy, wouldn't it?

Inspiration takes action. Aaron, you are an inspiration to anyone with the heart and strength of mind to understand how easily you could have become just another statistic. You didn't. You became a man who fought through the pain and the darkness of life, and came out a musician, and a man to be respected. Those who point their fingers should wish for such strength. Maybe what they should do, is lower their fingers, take a long, hard look at who they are. They should know that thier finger is raised, and their voices are screaming, because they do not have the strength to do what you did. THAT would be inspiring.

So, for you, I lower my finger. I take your act of returning from darkness and it inspires me to think about why I am the person that I am. It is not your music, and the lyrics that inspire. It is the man behind those tones and words.

To overcome the weakness inside of yourself, is to overcome the greatest obstacle. It is easy to raise yourself up from what others have done. It is next to impossible to raise yourself up from what you have done.

Lower your fingers. Do what Aaron did. Look into your hearts. Remember the innocence of a child, and don't be just another finger pointing in a crowd. We cannot change this world, until we change ourselves. WE are the composition, WE are lyrics, We are the audience, and WE are the artists. We make this world what it is. It is your choice to be a person of strength, like Aaron, or a person of weakness simply pointing and screaming.

On Aaron's behalf, I will stand outside of that crowded room, and I point my finger at you. I scream in your face, and tell you that you DO NOT have the courage that he does. I call out your weaknesses and your flaws, as dictated by my peers. I humiliate you, and push you to the breaking point, and beyond. I rob you of love, and sanctuary. There are thousands like me. Then I challenge you not to crumble. Can you do it? If you do crumble, can you recover?

I know this man now. I know him AFTER he pulled himself up. I do not know the old Aaron. I only know the result. I also know that I was a pointed finger. I accept my responsibility in what Aaron had to struggle through, and thanks to his inspiration to be stronger that I could, I lower my finger. I stop screaming without compassion. I will not do to you, what WE have done to him.

There will always be unrest and hate in our society. It is a sad reality that we all must face. Aaron faced it alone, and survived. It was a long road, and a painful process. Each and every one of us has travelled that road, in one way or another. How did you come out?

Get your finger out of my face. Lower your voice, and speak to me respectfully. If you do not, I will walk right past you....for Aaron.

Yikes...

2010-01-16T14:19:00.008-05:00

THE NEAR-BREAK-UP

Yesterday, I had a late-afternoon coffee with an editor friend. Since I was heading to my shrink afterward, I began telling my friend how I was SICK to death of the way my shrink was constantly encouraging me to dwell on my miserable childhood. And perhaps even more sick of the way that the very method of therapy seems to put me in a position where I am always asking myself: What's wrong with me? In what ways do I suck? And how can I maybe suck a little less? That I was at least equally sick of talking about life more than I was living it, it seemed.

I told her I wanted to stop trying to prevent unhappiness and start trying to make happiness.

I wanted to lighten up!

Anyway, after I left my friend, I waltzed up the 20 blocks to my shrink's office, feeling invigorated to the point of Mary-Tyler-Moore-ness by resolve: After 8 years, I was finally going to tell my shrink it was over! I was going to get that albatross off from around my neck!

And this time, unlike a few times in the past, I knew I wasn't motivated simply by my frustration over my lack of progress or because I was pissed off that my shrink had never suggested I take anti-depressants--which as I've said repeatedly, have really changed my life.

No, I was going to quit because I felt ready to move on, to take the reins, to take more responsibility for improving my life rather than passively depending on her to guide me through it. What's more, I was going to put the money I saved on my sessions to take myself out once a week: to dinner, or to see a performance at Brooklyn Academy of Music, or jazz at Lincoln Center, etc. Woo-hoo! Brilliant! Why hadn't I thought of this before?

And then I got to the office ... and I didn't want to start right in with the bad news ... so I started telling her about the awkwardness of the Saturday night dinner ... and about how I bumped into someone I used to care for a great deal over the last few days and how even just the quickest hug from him as we were both leaving an event tugged at my heart-strings (but is that only because I once thought his love could redeem me, if only I could win it? and is that healthy?) ... and ... one thing and another ... and I didn't go through with it.

http://www.marieclaire.com/sex-love/dating-blog/when-to-break-up-dump-your-shrink-noise-pollution

I really don't want to poke fun at this person's blog entry, being as he/she has spent the last eight years in therapy, but....

as usual, I am going to do it anyway....

I read this post this morning, and honestly, I could not stop laughing. Honey, who is your shrink? I think that you owe it to the community to make their identity public. Did you check on the wall for one of those framed degrees? You should probably take a look next time you go to break up with her.

You had a good plan going there! What happened?

Let's see if I can work some magic that, apparently, your overpaid shrink was unable to do.

I want you to ask yourself a question. What kind of a person requires someone else to "guide them through their life", and pays them to do so? But, more importantly, what kind of a person takes that money from the forementioned person while telling them to take the reigns in their own life???

Answer to question one: Someone who does not see their own strength and value. A person like this requires constant reassurance and guidance through the winding roads of life. They fear rejection, not having someone to love them, not making enough money, not pleasing their friends and family, and, most likely is a doormat in every relationship they have ever been in.

Answer to question number two: A hypocritical asshole who is getting rich off of others' suffering.

Do I really have to point out that your inablity to "break up" (nice choice of words, btw) with your shrink is the core of the reason that you go to the shrink in the first place? Why in the world would your "friendly neighborhood shrink" want it any other way?

You seriously mean to tell me that you could NOT walk into her office and tell her that after eight years, she sucks at this? That's funny, in an ironic and pathetic kind of way.

I think you should just put a quarter in one of those "fortune teller" machines every morning, and just go with it. It will be cheaper, and equally as effective, being as YOU live your life, therefore she is only guessing at solutions based on what you have told her, and accumulated data acquired through careful "scientific study".

That is all you are, honey. You are another quarter in the fortune teller gimmick machine. You put something in, you get something out. It is worth a quarter? Well, only if it seems to come true. So, you have put thousands of quarters in the machine, and it keeps spitting out prognostications and advice, but yet, the end result is always the same.....please drop in another quarter. Then you just wait to see if it was correct.

Do you NOT realize that YOU control whether or not your future is bright and happy? Why should someone else have to tell you that? How old are you? Listen, everyone has had shit in their lives. That is why this profession of "therapy" even exists. This may come as a revelation to you, but there are people who have lived through worse and come out of it without eight years of wasting time and money on regurgitated stock answers that lead NO WHERE!

Find a good friend who REALLy cares and will listen when you just need to emotionally vomit all over them. They are a rarity these days, but they do exist. Have a nice, relaxing day that YOU determine what makes you happy at that moment. Don't forget your past, use it to make you stronger and to guide you and teach others how to live, laugh and love. Make it into a strength instead of a weakness. Allow yourself to fail. You can't have it all, all of the time. Bury your head in your pillow and cry if you need to cry, then get up, look in the mirror and see the puffy red eyes and blotchy skin on your cheeks. Then ask yourself if that is the person you want the world to see. If the answer is as it should be...no. Then get cleaned up, find a reason to smile, and show that smile to the world.

Everything that happens to us, in this life, forms who we are, and who we will become. Don't fear it, but see it for what it is.....just life testing your fortitude.

After eight years, if you still feel as though you are not ready to live your life through your own ability to make decisions and handle the ramifications of them, well then, PLEASE fire that woman, and find someone who will do what they claim is their job....to just be a short term foundational guide....not a dependency.

Speaking of dependency....good luck with those anti depressants. ;)

Here we go again...

2009-12-28T19:19:00.008-05:00

LYRICA is not for everyone. LYRICA may cause serious, even life threatening, allergic reactions. Stop taking LYRICA and call your doctor right away if you have any signs of a serious allergic reaction. Some signs are swelling of your face, mouth, lips, gums, tongue or neck or if you have any trouble breathing, or have a rash, hives or blisters.

Drugs used to treat seizures increase the risk of suicidal thoughts or behavior. LYRICA may cause suicidal thoughts or actions in a very small number of people, about 1 in 500. Call your doctor right away if you have new or worsening depression, suicidal thoughts or actions, or unusual changes in mood or behavior. If you have suicidal thoughts or actions, do not stop LYRICA without first talking to your doctor.

LYRICA may cause swelling of your hands, legs and feet, which can be serious for people with heart problems. LYRICA may cause dizziness and sleepiness. You should not drive or work with machines until you know how LYRICA affects you. Also, tell your doctor right away about muscle pain or problems along with feeling sick and feverish, or any changes in your eyesight including blurry vision or if you have any kidney problems or get dialysis.

Some of the most common side effects of LYRICA are dizziness, blurry vision, weight gain, sleepiness, trouble concentrating, swelling of your hands and feet, dry mouth, and feeling "high". If you have diabetes, tell your doctor about any skin sores.

You may have a higher chance for swelling and hives if you are also taking angiotensin converting enzyme (ACE) inhibitors so tell your doctor if you are taking these medications. You may have a higher chance of swelling of your hands or feet or gaining weight if you are also taking certain diabetes medicines. Do not drink alcohol while on LYRICA. You may have a higher chance for dizziness and sleepiness if you take LYRICA with alcohol, narcotic pain medicines, or medicines for anxiety.

Before you start LYRICA, tell your doctor if you are planning to father a child, or if you are pregnant, plan to become pregnant, or are breast-feeding. If you have had a drug or alcohol problem, you may be more likely to misuse LYRICA.

In studies, a specific type of blood vessel tumor was seen in mice, but not in rats. The meaning of these findings in humans is not known.

Do not stop taking LYRICA without talking to your doctor. If you stop suddenly you may have headaches, nausea, diarrhea or trouble sleeping and if you have epilepsy, you may have seizures more often.

Now, did you actually read all of that? This is a drug prescribed and given to patients who suffer from fibromyalgia. This is a disease that causes chronic and insufferable pain. So, this is ANOTHER ad that I found on my homepage. This is what I am wondering. They give you a test to see if you have the "symptoms of the disease". Then, if you answer so many in a formulation that a pharmaceutical company has designed, you MAY have this disease, and you should see your doctor. Then, OF COURSE, you can ask him/her if you should take this drug. I am wondering who the hell sits behind their computer in chronic pain, and has NOT been to their doctor! "Oh, hey, look at that! I never thought that MAYBE I have a serious problem! Thank goodness for this ad, or I NEVER would have thought to see my doctor! Let me jot down the name of that drug, maybe THAT will help!"

Before you do that, pay attention.

LYRICA is not for everyone. LYRICA may cause serious, even life threatening, allergic reactions. Stop taking LYRICA and call your doctor right away if you have any signs of a serious allergic reaction. Some signs are swelling of your face, mouth, lips, gums, tongue or neck or if you have any trouble breathing, or have a rash, hives or blisters.

Ok, you can have severe allergic reaction to this drug. The "symptoms" that they are describing are that of anaphylaxis. I suggest that you look it up. You may only have minutes to respond, and receive treatment that will save your life.

Drugs used to treat seizures increase the risk of suicidal thoughts or behavior. LYRICA may cause suicidal thoughts or actions in a very small number of people, about 1 in 500. Call your doctor right away if you have new or worsening depression, suicidal thoughts or actions, or unusual changes in mood or behavior. If you have suicidal thoughts or actions, do not stop LYRICA without first talking to your doctor.

Hold on one minute! Seizures? I don't recall the ad saying ANYTHING about this being prescribed for that purpose. More bad news. Apparently, it can cause suicidal thoughts, as well. Just make sure you keep taking it until you can get another appointment with your doctor when his schedule clears in three months.

LYRICA may cause swelling of your hands, legs and feet, which can be serious for people with heart problems. LYRICA may cause dizziness and sleepiness. You should not drive or work with machines until you know how LYRICA affects you. Also, tell your doctor right away about muscle pain or problems along with feeling sick and feverish, or any changes in your eyesight including blurry vision or if you have any kidney problems or get dialysis.

Well, I would say that is a serious problem for people who DON'T have a heart condition, as well! Now you can't drive, or operate any machinery. Better get a buspass. Tell your doctor if you can't see. Really? You sure? ok, if you insist!

Some of the most common side effects of LYRICA are dizziness, blurry vision, weight gain, sleepiness, trouble concentrating, swelling of your hands and feet, dry mouth, and feeling "high". If you have diabetes, tell your doctor about any skin sores.

These are the COMMON side effects? You won't be in pain if you smoke weed too. That is a MUCH better way of feeling high without the....hold on a minute. Weed "side effects" are, snacking, trouble concentrating, sleepiness. Oh damn, that whole skin sores thing puts this drug WAY ahead of weed. You should definitely try this instead!

You may have a higher chance for swelling and hives if you are also taking angiotensin converting enzyme (ACE) inhibitors so tell your doctor if you are taking these medications. You may have a higher chance of swelling of your hands or feet or gaining weight if you are also taking certain diabetes medicines. Do not drink alcohol while on LYRICA. You may have a higher chance for dizziness and sleepiness if you take LYRICA with alcohol, narcotic pain medicines, or medicines for anxiety.

Basically if you are taking ANYTHING else for pain, you better stop. Oh come on now, they are in chronic unbearable pain! They can't drink??? Damn. It isn't like they are going to get a DUI, they can't freakin drive either! NEWSFLASH! These people are in constant pain! My guess is that they have anxiety and proned to depression. This shit better work! Will it?

Before you start LYRICA, tell your doctor if you are planning to father a child, or if you are pregnant, plan to become pregnant, or are breast-feeding. If you have had a drug or alcohol problem, you may be more likely to misuse LYRICA.

This is concerning. What the hell is it going to do to sperm??? More info please! There is a brilliant observation at the end, huh? Thanks for that. Very helpfull.

In studies, a specific type of blood vessel tumor was seen in mice, but not in rats. The meaning of these findings in humans is not known.

Then what the FUCK is the point in telling us this? Are we rats? Nope. Mice? Nope. Basically, you don't KNOW if this will cause tumors in humans. Great. Thanks again.

Do not stop taking LYRICA without talking to your doctor. If you stop suddenly you may have headaches, nausea, diarrhea or trouble sleeping and if you have epilepsy, you may have seizures more often.

Here we go with the seizures again. Epilepsy AND Fibromyalgia??? Nice. So, basically, if you are epileptic, this can kill you. But, you just said that...um...something about seizures...treatment....I am so confused.

OK people! I am not saying any more about this. Just read. If that isn't enough...I can't help you any further.

IT'S A MIRACLE!

2009-12-26T07:39:00.005-05:00

http://news.yahoo.com/video/world-15749633/christmas-miracle-church-s-window-saved-17286102

"A congregation WRESTING their way to a tough decision..they would sell their most valuable possession to shelter the homeless...."

"The building is in need of repair..."

"Four times as many homeless as 2 years ago..."

"agonizing choice....it's one treasure....a Tiffany stained glass window...worth about $75,000"

"It is a miracle....I think god is working in his way..."

Do we live on the same planet? This video and it's overly dramatic, "Twas the Night Before Christmas" style reading is laughable. I love the "heart string tugging" theatrics and overtstated emotional quandry.

Let me make it a little LESS dramatic, and paraphrase what happened here. The church in the spotlight contacted ABC news with a story that they were going to have to sell their Tiffany window if they wanted to shelter the homeless for Christmas. They broadcast the story in all of it's dramatic splendor. People began calling and donating money to the church. It was a miracle that they didn't have to sell a $75,000 window in a building that needs to be repaired.

*blink*

So, how many homeless did they shelter? Why has the homeless rate risen so drastically in the last 2 years? Why are their donations down? Where is the local member who can do drywall and painting, and is willing to help them out? Where do the homeless sleep the OTHER 364 days of the year?

Oh, never mind all of that, THE WINDOW HAS BEEN SAVED! It's a miracle! Hail jesus!

I just don't know how I could have laid my head on my pillow and fallen asleep tonight without knowing that another church didn't have to sell it's "most valuable posession" (funny, I thought that was their congregation itself) to help their community. I mean, what IS a church without a big gaudy stained glass window depicting someone with a halo holding a book, and pointing at nothing. Oh, that's right, it would be just another building full of people looking out regular windows. I get it now. It isn't a church without the window. It all makes sense.

If you took the window away, they would have to call themselves a "community center", or a building open to all members of the community where you can get rest, food, support and warm your hands and feet. But then that wouldn't be a church, now would it? Churches have membership dues. They only help non-members at certain times of year. They have to, after all, they are a business and you can't make money if you just GIVE it away!

Thank goodness they were able to save their window, otherwise people may accidentally stumble in there thinking it was something else. Whew! Close call, guys. Good thing god was workin' the phones and willing to air your story, or else the "Christmas Tiffany window worth $75,000" would have gone to lord only knows who. I bet...another church. Don't beat yourselves up over it, they just have a more business savvy congregation. You better straighten yourselves out though, I don't think god does repeat miracles. Next year you will have to sell the obnoxious pipe organ.

Since when did being free in this country mean being free from being offended?

2009-12-06T20:04:00.003-05:00

I would like to thank the late, great George Carlin for the title to this one. The most recent victim of "be careful, you might offend someone" is, Saturday Night Live. Here is an excerpt from an article criticizing their most recent skit...

'SNL' Criticized After Airing Tiger Woods Domestic Violence Skit While Rihanna On Show
Sun Dec 6, 11:42 AM PST

"Saturday Night Live" is making headlines for featuring a skit over the weekend, which parodied domestic violence.

On Saturday night's episode, the NBC sketch comedy show made light of Tiger Woods' scandalous week, satirizing reports - denied by the golfer - that his wife, Elin Nordegren, attacked him prior to his early-morning car accident on November 27 with a sketch featuring Keenan Thomson and host Blake Lively.

However, the show's musical guest was Rihanna - a victim of domestic violence earlier this year from then-boyfriend Chris Brown -- prompting concerns from several media outlets that the show's humor was insensitive from some corners.

"It was another sketch that gave us pause," noted PopEater in an article titled "'SNL' Lampoons Alleged Violence in Tiger Woods' Marriage," on Sunday. "We think, had the genders been reversed, 'SNL' wouldn't make light of the potentially violent situation."

http://tv.yahoo.com/news/article/tv.accesshollywood.com/tv.accesshollywood.com-snl-criticized-after-airing-tiger-woods-domestic-violence-skit-while-rihanna-show

First of all, there has been NO confirmation that Tiger Woods is the "victim of domestic violence". So, until it is confirmed that Tiger has lived in fear of his ex-model, 115 lb wife beating him within inches of death, shut the fuck up about that! The idea that Tiger was busted cheating, and his wife got in a few hits with a golf club to his rear window was the parody of this skit. They made the parody because Tiger IS NOT the "victim of domestic abuse". I have news for you. Neither is Rihanna. At least the writer of this article got the terminology remotely correct. Thank you for NOT using the term, "domestic abuse". You are in the minority.

I am so tired of twits like her sucking up the attention while REAL domestic abuse victims cower in their homes fearing for their lives. Let's look at the facts of what happened between Rihanna and Chris Brown. First of all, let's remember their ages. They are children playing in an adult world. Rihanna intercepts a text on Chris Brown's phone, one that apparently pointed to him having relations with another woman. Big surprise there, Rihanna! She proceeds to engage him in a long drawn out argument, when he is driving the car, where she demands the answer that SHE wants to hear from him. He can't take any more of her mouth, and shuts it for her. Now, was he wrong? OF COURSE HE WAS! BUT, what is HER culpability in this? Does she have any? Yes, she does. She knows he is cheating, she just read it in his text. She wanted to fight. She got a fight. She lost. These two children made an immature decision. Instead of her asking him to pull the car over, getting a cab, and cooling down before discussing this issue, she picked a fight based in pure emotion. Instead of him pulling the car over, and handing her the keys, and getting out, so as to avoid a confrontation that can lead to only anger and aggression, he hit her.

So, Rihanna parades around the country telling her tale of woe, and effectively victimizing herself to the point of boosting her record sales. Chris Brown publically apologizes to Rihanna, and every other woman who may come along in another text. They both appear on Oprah, give press conferences, and make millions from their moment of heated anger. Did Rihanna suffer some bruises, and feel fear while he was hitting her? Yes, she did. Does he REALLY feel sorry for what he did? I doubt that his sympathy lies with her plight, but more with the fool that he has made himself to be. The best part of this story, is that the twit took him back after prancing around claiming to be a victim of domestic abuse.

Now, HERE is where I really take issue with this nonsense, and our perception of what is and is NOT domestic abuse. There are MEN and women in this country that endure days upon weeks upon years of horrible abuse, both mental and physical. It is taboo for men to speak out about the psychological abuse inflicted upon them by the women who claim to love them. It is fashionable to be a "survivor of domestic abuse" in the eyes of some women. Domestic abuse, and being a victim of it, is a forced state of mind placed on your partner by coercion or fear. It causes a person to live a life void of security, trust, independence and self worth. It can leave scars that are both physical and mental. Now, everyone has made Rihanna into some kind of hero for "helping young women to see the trappings of abusive relationships". How quickly you all shut up when she took him back.

Where is the TV time for the REAL survivors of domestic abuse? Where is Oprah when man trapped in a 30 year marriage FINALLY gets the divorce that he has feared? Where is his story of how his loving wife threatened to kill herself, take him bankrupt and keep their children from him if he ever left her? Where is the empathy for the women who work two jobs, and take the beating that could be for her children because her drunk boyfriend/ husband has threatened to kill her, her children and anyone who aids her in leaving him? THAT is domestic abuse. THAT is being trapped and not seeing a way out that does not make the pain even worse. Rihanna flapping her mouth at a moron who is cheating on her, and him reacting out of frustration is a violent incident, NOT domestic abuse. IF you strike another person out of anger, you are person of weak character and deserve whatever the laws determine is a fit punishment. Those laws should be equal regardless of gender or sexual orientation. IF you put yourself, willingly, into a situation where it can turn violent and then capitalize on the weakness of another with NO culpability in your part that was played, well then, you are a twit, and a manipulator. Rihanna, you have not saved other women. You have exposed yourself as an immature child who has mastered playing the victim to hide the embarrassment of being in the public eye.

There are those who will criticize my stand on this issue, but I have never been silent before, and am not about to now. This idiot and her antics has diminished the severity of the crime of domestic abuse, and made people roll their eyes at the very mention of the term. Did she go on stage, and say, "Being a victim of abuse, I want to stop here, and say something. I think that making fun of the idea that Tiger could be a victim of abuse is callous and I refuse to take part in a form of entertainment that belittles the idea that men are ALSO abused in this country, and it should not be made light of. I am a victim of domestic abuse, and I want everyone to know that BOTH men and women live in fear and violence, and I will not participate in this any further." Nope. She went on, and made her money. What a great spokesperson for the abused in this country. What a crock of shit!

Domestic abuse has been defined socially as a woman being beaten by a man. There is STILL no consideration for the thousands of men who live in fear of their wives and girlfriends. Ladies, listen to me. If you raise your hand to a man, you better be ready and willing to take a punch. How many women have struck first and played the victim? I guarantee MANY! We have made such an issue out of men hitting women that we have lost sight of what abuse really is. It is control. It is not allowing the one who loves you to be a person. They become a possession. They are controlled and beaten emotionally and physically to the point of losing the will to live. How can we place Rihanna and Tiger Woods even REMOTELY into that category? What is happening is EVERY incident of violence between people involved in a relationship falls under "domestic abuse". This is NOT helping the people who still do not see a way out of their situations.

Was it tacky and tasteless for SNL to parody Tiger Woods? Yes, it was. Frankly, that is the style of humor that SNL has become. They are tacky and tasteless and they go for the easy laugh. What we need to ask ourselves is why is it funny? Why did Rihanna go on that stage? It is funny because we don't take abuse inflicted on men seriously. Rihanna went on stage because she is NOT a victim of domestic abuse, she is the victim of a violent incident, and has NOT been scarred by it, but profited from it. She used the moment to sell albums, for fuck's sake!

Part of the freedom that we enjoy in this country is freedom of speech. If you are offended by the skit done by SNL, GOOD! Just be offended because the parody of Tiger was symbolic of the lack of attention paid to REAL domestic abuse that men endure, and NOT because the attention whore, Rihanna, might have been upset by it. Clearly she wasn't, but she may get a few more interviews out of pretending like she was. We need shows like SNL to shove in our faces what our culture reflects! The very definition of what is funny, is that it MUST be relatable to be funny. How many of you laughed at the idea of Tiger with a golf club wrapped around his head? Now, how many of you would have found it funny if that were true, and he was fighting for his life with head injuries and in a coma. We can't keep moving the line, people. We push it forward and pull it back until soon, the line is nothing but a blur. The skit was allowed because Tiger is not abused. Rihanna went on anyway because she did not have enough of a problem with what they were doing not to. What does that tell about us, as a society? It tells us that we have made a WAY bigger case out of one side, and not enough of one on the other. Where is the line? I think that SNL just showed you. Open your eyes and see it for what it was. It was just another weak attempt at going for the cheap laugh. The question is, why was it cheap, and why did Rihanna contribute to it?

Be offended, and be free. You cannot shut out what you find to be "offensive". You cannot silence those who mock something you see as serious. Comedy would die. It's very essence depends on the flaws in human nature. Just stop using every damn thing you don't like as a cause that has to be fought. Stop creating false heros and willing victims, and watch how fast shows like SNL go off the air. We need idiots like Rihanna and Tiger Woods, or you idiots would have nothing to talk about. It isn't like we are involved in a major war, and economic disaster, healthcare is in the toilet, and...oh, never mind it is DEFINITELY more important to bitch about Rihanna's black eye and Tiger's affairs. The sad thing is you just keep missing the big picture.

Nigga WHAT???

2009-12-06T10:06:00.006-05:00

Tupac Makes Vatican MySpace Playlist

.

Tupac's song "Changes" is one of 9 entries on the MySpace page for Pope Benedict XVI's album "Alma Mater: Music From The Vatican."

Father Giulio Neroni, artistic director of church publisher St. Paul's Multimedia, helmed the list, CNN reports. He also compiled the songs for the Pope Benedict XVI's featured Alma Mater album..

Some might question the Vatican's use of a song from such a controversial artist. The jailed rapper ultimately succumbed to violence when he was fatally shot in Las Vegas in 1996.

http://new.music.yahoo.com/blogs/hiphopmediatraining/235935/tupac-makes-vatican-myspace-playlist/

Please forgive the title of this article, but know that it is simply my idea of what the late Tupac Shakur whould have said if he knew this was happening. That, my friends is the ONLY thing that I will apologize for in this entry. Frankly, I don't even know where to begin with this one. I will try to control my stream of consciousness and profanity to make a coherent and well reasoned post. I said TRY. I am not making any promises.

First, let me post for you the lyrics to the the song chosen, "Changes"....

Come on come on
I see no changes wake up in the morning and I ask myself
is life worth living should I blast myself?
I'm tired of bein' poor & even worse I'm black
my stomach hurts so I'm lookin' for a purse to snatch
Cops give a damn about a negro
pull the trigger kill a nigga he's a hero
Give the crack to the kids who the hell cares
one less hungry mouth on the welfare
First ship 'em dope & let 'em deal the brothers
give 'em guns step back watch 'em kill each other
It's time to fight back that's what Huey said
2 shots in the dark now Huey's dead
I got love for my brother but we can never go nowhere
unless we share with each other
We gotta start makin' changes
learn to see me as a brother instead of 2 distant strangers
and that's how it's supposed to be
How can the Devil take a brother if he's close to me?
I'd love to go back to when we played as kids
but things changed, and that's the way it is

[Bridge w/ changing ad libs]
Come on come on
That's just the way it is
Things'll never be the same
That's just the way it is
aww yeah
[Repeat]

[2]
I see no changes all I see is racist faces
misplaced hate makes disgrace to races
We under I wonder what it takes to make this
one better place, let's erase the wasted
Take the evil out the people they'll be acting right
'cause both black and white is smokin' crack tonight
and only time we chill is when we kill each other
it takes skill to be real, time to heal each other
And although it seems heaven sent
We ain't ready, to see a black President, uhh
It ain't a secret don't conceal the fact
the penitentiary's packed, and it's filled with blacks
But some things will never change
try to show another way but you stayin' in the dope game
Now tell me what's a mother to do
bein' real don't appeal to the brother in you
You gotta operate the easy way
"I made a G today" But you made it in a sleazy way
sellin' crack to the kid. " I gotta get paid,"
Well hey, well that's the way it is

[Bridge]

[Talking:]
We gotta make a change...
It's time for us as a people to start makin' some changes.
Let's change the way we eat, let's change the way we live
and let's change the way we treat each other.
You see the old way wasn't working so it's on us to do
what we gotta do, to survive.

[3]
And still I see no changes can't a brother get a little peace
It's war on the streets & the war in the Middle East
Instead of war on poverty they got a war on drugs
so the police can bother me
And I ain't never did a crime I ain't have to do
But now I'm back with the facts givin' it back to you
Don't let 'em jack you up, back you up,
crack you up and pimp slap you up
You gotta learn to hold ya own
they get jealous when they see ya with ya mobile phone
But tell the cops they can't touch this
I don't trust this when they try to rush I bust this
That's the sound of my tool you say it ain't cool
my mama didn't raise no fool
And as long as I stay black I gotta stay strapped
& I never get to lay back
'Cause I always got to worry 'bout the pay backs
some buck that I roughed up way back
comin' back after all these years
rat-a-tat-tat-tat-tat that's the way it is uhh

[Bridge 'til fade]

There are two types of Tupac fans in the world, ones that love him and ones that love to hate him. Then, there are those of us who live in the real world. Tupac Shakur lived a life riddled with violence and hatred. His mother was a long standing member of The Black Panthers. He grew up in East Harlem, where is youth and innocence was stolen by the streets. I would advise anyone with any opinion at all on this man to read, at the very least, the information contained in Wikipedia. He is a poster child for the hatred that has consumed this country. His death, and his life speak to the violence and racism that still exists no matter who won this past election.

My personal opinion of Tupac Shakur is a complicated one. I am not a fan of the ganster rap genre. I find it to be hypocritcal in it's message and promoting of a lifestyle that inevitably leads to pain and death. The artists would tell you otherwise. Their claim is that they speak of their lives and experiences in the hopes of opening people's eyes to the violence and racism that they endure. This message, in their opinion, will lead others AWAY from that life, and make them understand that we need to rise above the pain of our pasts, and become one people. Bullshit. I might believe that if many of these rappers with millions of dollars had abandoned their ways of the past, but they have not. There is great pain contained within the lyrics of their music. It is a world that many of us cannot understand or relate to, but unfortunately, there are many who can. I have heard good people who have overcome the trappings of gang life spout on and on about how they love Tupac because he speaks for them, and their suffering. I do not understand this, nor will I ever have the life experience to have relatable feelings on the matter. Here is another example of Tupac's success as a mentor and role model...

Yeah nigga
Yo Pac (That's right)
Yo, I heard you got beat up by the police
Got a big fat lawsuit and everything (yeah)
Niggaz just wanna know if your still gonna be on some crooked ass nigga shit

[2pac Verse 1]
Please tell me what's a nigga to do and it's true
Ain't nuttin' new so I do what I can to get through
Now first they had me trapped and now I'm pissed
A loaded AK47 layin on my hips so don't trip
One motherfucker from the underground
And Big Stretch buckin' niggaz if they fuck around
Yo, why ya'll got beef with police?
Ain't that a bitch them motherfuckers gotta beef with me
They make it hard for me to sleep
I wake up at the slightest peep and my sheets are 3 feet deep
I guess it's hard for you to see
But now I'm pointin the finger at police instead of motherfuckers blamin' me
I got the right to bear a pistol
And when them punk motherfuckers get to trippin' I got shit too
And maybe then you'll see the truth
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too

[Chorus]
It's all up to you
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
And maybe then you'll see the truth (awwwwww)
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
It's all up to you
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
And maybe then you'll see the truth (awwwwww) Oooh!
You can't fuck with the crew, a crooked nigga too

[2pac Verse 2]
You know you really can't say that you blame niggaz
Fuck bein' tame, set a flame, tryin' to aim triggaz
2pac'll spark a revolution, fuck the constitution
I want my bucks for restitution
This time you got a bigger problem
Time to face the niggas from South Central, Oakland, Brooklyn and Harlem
And we ain't shootin' at eachother (fuck no), that's a motherfuckin' brother
So save two, run for cover
And other bitches from the clan
Come feel the wrath of a black man that doesn't smoke crack and
I don't drink St. Ides (fuck that!)
Genuine draft ganja ganja and my fuckin' Tec-9
They know their scared to see us sober (awwwww)
Cobra - And niggaz will take the world over
It's all up to you (up to you) Blame the Korean (fuck that)
I'll be a crooked nigga too

[Chorus]
It's all up to you
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
And maybe then you'll see the truth (awwwwww)
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
It's all up to you
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
And maybe then you'll see the truth (awwwwww) Oooh!
You can't fuck with the crew, a crooked nigga too

[2pac Verse 3]
Pardon me, ?? has been God and try me
I'll be damned if I die come look at the rage in my eyes G
They got my homies in a jail cell
Now it's the rebel and the devil and one of us is goin' to hell
I got the whole place covered with loc'ed out brothers
And nothing but love for eachother
So motherfucker make a motion
I give a fuck, slice you up, and throw your ass in the ocean
Temperatures drop
See it's cool to shoot a nigga but they hate it when we pop the cops
That's when they gettin' petrol
You better watch your step or you'll be left on deathrow
But I learned to look ahead of me
Stay strapped, watch your back, keep your eyes on the enemy
We blowin' up precincts and oooohhhh you can't fuck with the crew
A crooked nigga too

[Chorus]
It's all up to you
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
And maybe then you'll see the truth (awwwwww)
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
It's all up to you
But until then I gotta do what I do and stay a crooked nigga too
And maybe then you'll see the truth (awwwwww) Oooh!
You can't fuck with the crew, a crooked nigga too

Sorry folks, but this man was FAR FROM someone who should be considered a role model or a mentor. He died in the very life that he chose to die in. We all have choices in this world, and Tupac made his, and paid the ultimate price for it. Now, before you get all in a huff over my irreverence toward this man, listen to me. I see Tupac as an INCREDIBLE talent. His ability to speak to people and move them to empowerment is undeniable. He was a man of vast ability and drive. Tupac Shakur took what was an unbearable pain and made it into a billion dollar business. That is the American way. You take what you can, and you make the best of it. The only problem is, it was the best for HIM, not for society itself. He MAY have intended the lyrics to be heard and understood one way, but as with any art form, it is open for interpretation. Tupac may very well have killed more young men and women than he saved. We can only speculate on the true impact of this genre of music. I am not concerned for the suburban brats who sag their pants and hang his poster on the wall, I am concerned for the young men and women who live the same life as Tupac. I am concerned that their ability to relate to him, and his music will be their demise. There is an air of justification for their actions in his music. The words may sound as if they are carrying one message, but the whole composition itself holds quite a different effect. There is an anger and resentment that is apparent to anyone who listens and feels the music, not just reads the lyrics or turns the station when they hear the pounding baselines.

So, I read this article this morning about the Catholic Church including one of Tupac's songs as part of their My Space music list. I am stunned. I sat back in my chair and took a moment to think about what the motivation here must be. Well, it didn't take me long to come to the conclusion that Tupac and The Vatican have a shared motive. Money. I will, however, give credit where credit is due. I DO enjoy the fact that The Vatican just shot itself in the ass with their customer base. By that, I mean, how many good, white, racist Catholics just felt like they have been deeply betrayed? That gives me a warm fuzzy feeling in the pit of my stomach to know that there are white mommies and daddies who will no longer allow their children to be on The Vatican's My Space page. I mean, it is ok for them to aknowledge artists like Tina Turner and Nat King Cole, after all, thems is good entertainment, quality, down home, obedient colored folks. But TUPAC SHAKUR??? Oh my, what would grandma say, assuming she even knew what My Space is. There it is, folks. My Space is a draw for the next generation. It is young, and has abandoned the backwards thinking generation that hates technology and the constant hustle and bustle of "kids today". Put very simply, they are trying a new recruiting method. It is brlliant in one way, and incredibly foolish in another. What the good perverts of the Vatican seem to forget is that racism still runs with vigor through the world. Do these morons think that just because Tupac was American and we now have a black president, that they are free to welcome a brotha into their ranks of morally upstanding and superior? NOPE! They are trying to show how "open minded" they are, and prove to the world that they are not the judgemental dickheads that we, without indoctrination, already know that they are? They have to be kidding, right?

Sadly, they are not kidding. They think that if they succumb to the pressures of the next generation and show how "hip and open minded" they are, their chances of recruiting are better. What an unbelieveable bunch of BULLSHIT! Let me remind all of you that this is the organization that dictates who can and cannot marry. They dictate what you can and cannot do with your own bodies. They STILL hold women as second class citizens within their ranks. This is all fine and good for the catholic, straight white male, but how in the name of FUCK, can one rationalize the life of a man like Tupac Shakur and the teachings of the Catholic church?

Hey fuckheads, yeah, you, Father whatever the fuck, are you completely insane? I will bold this part for you. TUPAC SHAKUR'S MUSIC WAS A REFLECTION OF GANG VIOLENCE. IT BROUGHT TO LIGHT THE SUFFERING AND DEATH OF THOUSANDS OF BLACK MEN AND WOMEN AT THE HANDS OF CORRUPT POLICE FORCES AND RACIST, HATEFUL WHITES! HE ALSO BROUGHT BLACK ON BLACK CRIME TO OUR ATTENTION, AND FED THE RACISTS WHO JUSTIFY THEIR DEATHS! HE WAS A MAN WHO WAS NEVER SILENT ABOUT HIS LOVE OF GOD AND HIS FAITH. HE DIED AT THE OTHER END OF A GUN ONLY BECAUSE HE DIDN'T SHOOT FIRST! HE HAS RECRUITED MORE YOUNG MEN AND WOMEN TO FOLLOW HIM THAT YOU CAN EVER IMAGINE! BUT YOU, YOU FUCKING HYPOCRITE, THINK THAT YOU CAN MAKE ONE OF HIS SONGS AN EXAMPLE OF HOW TO LIVE, AND YET PREVENT GAY MEN FROM MARRYING EACH OTHER???? YOU ARE FUCKING INSANE!!!!

Come on, guys. Why no big press release and speech from the head of your band of goons on this WONDERFUL new acceptance to your ranks? OH, I know why, because you have a target audience and you DAMN WELL know better than to make it TOO public and lose your base. I can't even come up with a list of adjectives for what I think you are for pulling this stunt. You just keep bending the rules to fit what the times demand. You are doing whatever a good business does to keep up with the changing times. I can see that. Unfortunately, your bleating sheep cannot. If they can't see you for what you are, they are even more idiotic than I once thought. The Catholic church just made a man who lived his life based in money, crime, anger, theft, violence, rape, hatred, intolerance, greed, and blasphemy an example of what is good.

Hey, maybe I am being too hard on them. Maybe Father whatever the fuck REALLY sees the pure artistry and pain of the inner city black man. Maybe he sees the suffering of humanity through the lyrics of a dead gangster rapper. Maybe he, in his heart, knows that if Tupac had the opportunities provided to the middle class, white catholic he would still be alive and working as an accountant somewhere. Maybe he knows, all too well, the trappings of poverty and the anger that can arise from it. Maybe he sees that our youth is in desperate need of positive role models, and also has the ability to discern symbolism for reality. I highly doubt that last one. So do you, don't you Father whatever the fuck. As a matter of fact, that is what you are "banking on", isn't it? Maybe what you actually want is some of that money that they are spending on Tupac posters, and not in your organization. After all, if they take Tupac's lyrics literally, they will take your "lyrics" literally too.

Merry Fuckin Christmas!

2009-12-01T16:53:00.004-05:00

'Tis the season for detecting Epilepsy in your family members. It's "twinkle light" time, folks! I watched my next door neighbor hang his twinkly lights that are loosely designed to resemble ice cycles. This man should consider a career in the circus. He must have missed this year's ladder safety training. I don't know if all of you realize this, but there ARE instructions on your ladder. When they tell you that this ladder is to be placed on a level surface and you are NOT to step above the yellow part, they mean it. When did twinkle lights become more important to us than the safety and well being of our family members? I see this every year, wives standing on the ground or in the doorway pointing out that the lights are sagging or not EXACTLY lining the gutter. Come on guys, get over that fear of falling 4 stories to your death, and hang the damn lights so that the whole neighborhood can be in awe of how perfectly straight they are!

For me, twinkly lights are the core symbolism of the Christmas season. I drive past people's homes with string upon string of twinkly lights all blinking in different rhythms, colors clashing and making your head hurt, perfectly lined gutters with trees that look like a midget just threw them randomly in the air, and where they land is where they stay. What the hell is wrong with you people?? Listen to me. I don't know who the hell came up with the idea that red and green should EVER be used together in decorating. I do know this though, that big inflatable snow globe that contains a man with a beer belly wearing a red suit, and little people that resemble children is obnoxious and really does not help to accentuate the blinking blue ice cycle lights hanging from your porch railing. By far, my favorite pointless holiday decoration has to be the cemetery wreath, it ranks right up there with the flagpole with lights creatively strung from the top to resemble a pine cone. Oh sorry, that was Pagan/Wiccan symbolism. You mean it to look like a tree, huh? Oh well, you should know that is Pagan too. Yes, that's right. Jesus had NOTHING to do with pine trees. That is a little detail you should have investigated before you stole the symbolism for your "Christian holiday". But I digress, back to cemetery wreaths. You Do know that whoever is buried there is dead, right? I am just asking because I can not figure how this is a reasonable tradition. Nothing says "Merry Christmas" like driving past a vast sea of death and seeing hundreds of green circles with red bows on them.

I also question this little decorating contradiction. Why the hell do you have Santa on the roof in a red sleigh and pulled by reindeer while displaying a Nativity scene in the front lawn? Why not light a menorah and hang the star of David from your tree just to make sure you have all the bases covered! Now, don't forget about hanging strings of blinking stars and snowflakes all around your red, green and black candles. You don't know what that is? Ok, it is for Kwanzaa celebrations. I know, I know, "that is just a made up holiday, blah blah..." Are you kidding me? You jackasses worship the idea of a child born to a virgin (you need to look up the word virgin), and being given gifts from kings who travelled HOW FAR following just a star, all the while believing some shit about a fat man breaking into your home to bring you shit that YOU just bought. YET, you call THAT holiday made up? Seriously?

Ok so, I am willing to let all of that slide. As ridiculous as it all is, I get it. You want a reason to shop. That is all this boils down to, right? We have to shop for the newest decorations. We have to shop for our co workers that we bitch about everyday. We have to shop for our already over indulged children. We have to shop for the inlaws that you see once a year ONLY because you have to. Wait a minute. Am i missing the point here? Maybe I am. Let me do some thinking on it.

I am done thinking now. This is the conclusion that I have come to. You are all full of shit. How do you hear terms like "Black Friday", "biggest shopping day of the year", "Christmas madness sale" and really think that this holiday has anything to do with anything other than greed? You call this the "season for sharing and giving", but come on now. I hear people complain about their gifts, compare the monetary value of one gift versus another, complain about the "stress of the season", and I think you are all insane.

Someone PLEASE explain to me how the birth of "the son of god" and being brought gifts from three kings translates into "Black Friday". For those of you who don't know what that actually means, it means the day that retail stores go "into the black", in other words, MAKE THE MOST MONEY!

HAHA, and you Christians use the term "Jewish" for being greedy or cheap. Go buy another set of twinkle lights and scream at your husband to hang them straight. Just please thank the Pagans for 90% of your stupid Christian tradition. Have fun at church on Christmas, just make sure you buy a new outfit for the occasion, Petite Sophisticate needs to make it into the black.

I will be at home with my kids, living in the real world and explaining to them where these traditions really come from, and what sharing actually is. I know that sounds crazy, but it works for me. We will have fun, relax and enjoy each other's company, whether or not Wal Mart makes it into the black. Your nativity scene and twinkle lights may say Christmas to you, but family and love are what your stupid commercial holiday means to me. Thank you, I will steal it from you the same way you have stolen it for hundreds of years. Thanks again, and Merry fuckin Christmas holiday shoppers!

What are the colors of humanity?

2009-11-28T19:02:00.004-05:00

How wonderful it must be to be blissfully clueless. My son was hospitalized this week due to a severe asthma attack. I live in a city where we are lucky enough to have high quality hospitals and medical care. We recently built a new hospital dedicated to the care of children. Our previous medical facility for this purpose was a bit outdated and structurally unsound. This was my first visit to the new facility.

When I pulled up to the emergency entrance at 12 midnight, the neatly dressed valet greeted us at our vehicle wearing his bright red jacket and a smile. We were efficiently escorted from our vehicle and into the building. We entered the building through brand new doors and were stunned by a visual experience that would make the Vatican green with envy. The floors are literally paved in gold and gemstones. The tile glitters and the walls are adorned with mosaic art. There was a spiral staircase that seemed to be endless swirling it's way past beautiful windows that gazed out upon the beauty of our city. There are bilious murals that guide you down hallways that are wide enough to accommodate vehicle traffic. Gracing every corner is a kiosk designed to direct you wherever you need to go through a system of color coding with "fruit" as the identifying color. Located conveniently near each kiosk is a security booth and mac machine. Everything is clearly labeled and there is always someone to provide assistance, if necessary.

We were efficiently registered and waited no longer than 5 minutes for a nurse to escort us to the emergency room. The nurses are all dressed in playfully bright scrubs and stuffed toys dangle from the stethoscopes. The room where my son was treated was instantly packed with several nurses and two physicians. I gazed around the room, amazed by the efficiency and the technology that swirled around me. Within minutes, my son was stabilized and comfortable. No one seemed rushed or panicked and the atmosphere was that of just carrying on business as usual.

Now that my son is stable and sleeping, I require coffee. I ask the nurse where I can locate the cafeteria. She provides efficient directions, but asks me if I would like her to get it for me. I declined the offer, being as I needed to take a walk. I am adorned with a visitors pass, and exit the ER. I traveled through this hospital expecting to find the typical cafeteria, lacking any luster and comfort. I was wrong. The cafeteria is a secured area. It requires a pass to open the door. I assume that this is additional security to keep our children safe from the outside threats that can present themselves in a crowded environment. I entered a nauseatingly cheerful scene. There are dried foods that decorate the counters, a vast selection of child friendly foods and snacks, and endless counters with dozens of choices in foods. The seating area overlooks a courtyard with chaise lounge chairs and brightly trimmed window panes. The landscaping is simple as to not distract from the beautiful paving of the enormous patio, complete with tables, chairs and umbrellas. That too, is a secure door. The art on the walls is that of children's shadow boxes. The frames are hand-painted and the boxes contain the imagination of a child free of illness. The light fixtures are soft and comforting, not the harsh fluorescent bulbs of the past.

After several hours, my son is transferred to the Neo-natal Intensive Care Unit. If you think that this place is over the top, you haven't seen anything yet. Upon entering the NICU, the family waiting room is located just to your left and prior to the security desk that you must visit in order for the nurse to open the locked door to the unit. Once identified as the child's family member, access is granted. One thing that impacted me immediately was silence. There was no beeping of monitors, no loud proclamations over a loud speaker, just silence and smiling faces. I wondered how it was so quiet. Then I realized why. Each room within the NICU has a sound proof glass sliding door. There is no more of the cheap wooden doors, or curtains separating patients from each other. Every room in the NICU is a private one. When I walked through the door to my son's room, I couldn't believe my eyes. I have stayed at 4 star hotels with less amenities than this room had. He had a desk in the corner, (in case he wants to start that novel that he has been putting off), there is a couch that opens into a full size bed, a coffee table, a private bathroom, a 32" flatscreen TV, a mobile data center for the nurses, all monitoring equipment is suspended from the ceiling, so as not to be obtrusive or garish. This small child lays in a bed that is fit for a king. He looked so lost in the oversized comfort of his new bed. We close the door behind us, and slide over the bright curtain that provides privacy from passers by.

Located outside of each room in the NICU is another monitor by which the nurses can watch the child's vitals without ever having to enter the room and "disturb them". Below the monitor is another desk complete with a 42" computer screen for them to do their charting and ordering meds from the on site pharmacy. This was sensory overload, for me. I decided that since my son was asleep, that I would venture out to the cafeteria once more. On this trip, I passed the gift shop. I felt as though I had located the local mall. It was enormous and carried everything imaginable. Disney would be proud.

This was when I stopped dead in my tracks, and while staring at the bronze statue of the entire cast of the Wizard Of Oz, remembered a trip to the older Children's Hospital several years prior.

Yes, my son was hospitalized previously at the older facility. It was, again, his asthma. He was admitted to that hospital and spent 4 days total there. It was a fight on the fourth day to get my son released. I had never experienced this before, and was confused by it. From what I understood of hospitals, they were always in a rush to "get the bed emptied". My son had been off of all medication for over 6 hours, at this point. He was spunky, and playing video games on the portable game unit that the nurses had wheeled into his room days prior. I requested that physician release him to go home. This took hours of pleading after multiple excuses as to why they "hadn't processed the paperwork yet". I was beginning to become irritated. Then, the unimaginable happened. Another young boy around 8 years of age was wheeled into my son's room. This child had recently had surgery on his spine and brain stem. He was fastened into one of those horrible head halos that bolt to the child's shoulders. He was moaning in pain when they wheeled him in. There was only a curtain to separate us, so I was privy to all discussions on the other side of that curtain. After approximately an hour, the nurse entered the room to speak with that child's parents. She informed them that they were discharging their son. Both parents were upset and questioned why. They were told, in no uncertain terms, that their child's insurance would not pay for any longer stay in the hospital, and if they wanted him to stay, they had to sign a form stating that they would be financially responsible for the medical bills.

Read that one more time, and let it sink in. I want you to realize that this child was no more than 4 hours out of major surgery and they were discharging him, moaning in pain. His mother was in tears and pleading for another option. the nurse told her that if she wanted to, she could take the child home for 24 hours, and then return and the insurance would pay for another 48 hours total. They were out of options, and had no choice but to begin to pack their son's things to return home. By the way, they wouldn't even validate their parking because they did not enter the hospital via the ER.

At this point, I am enraged and appalled. My son has been NOT receiving treatment for over 7 hours, yet my insurance is being billed ONLY because they are willing to pay. This little boy is being booted out on his backside because his insurance will not pay any further. I stated to the nurse that she could just bill my insurance for that kid because they are defrauding my insurance company anyway by keeping my son there. I then asked her to give the video game console to the other boy so that at least he had something to keep his mind off the pain. She callously stated simply, "no."

So, I look around at this monstrosity of a hospital, and even though I am so very thankful that it is here, I can't help but ask myself a question. What do these beautiful walls have to hide? Does it really matter if the walls and floor are paved with gold, when young children are suffering because their parents cannot afford a stay at a 5 star resort? This thought saddens me, and makes me see this building as Pandora's box. I return to the NICU floor, and as I walk past the family waiting area, I see a grandmother with tears streaming down her face. I see another younger woman sobbing and her mascara rolling down her cheeks. That is the real colors of a child's hospital, people. They are the colors of human suffering and pain. That woman's son will never leave that palace. He will take his last breaths in a brightly colored room full of all the comforts of modern medical technology. How easily we forget how lucky we are. My son will leave there, and remember his stay there as one of fun and safety. But there are others who will never leave, and even more who will never even get the chance to see it.

So, to the administrators, architects, interior designers, and consultants, I make you an offer. I am willing to forego the glittered tile, remove the desk from my son's room, tone down the paint and decorations, and then take that money and donate it to the care of children who cannot afford what my son is lucky enough to have, HEALTH CARE! Goddamnit! You are a hospital. Where the hell have your priorities gone? Do you really think that your lavender paint and big screen tv give any comfort to the families of dead children? Do you think that your beautiful window dressings give comfort to those who cannot afford the thousands of dollars that a one night stay and some antibiotics will cost them? I cannot be bought with a pretty book cover, ladies and gentlemen, because I have seen the pages, and I have read your book. You may have fooled the blissfully clueless, but honestly, do you really care about the health and well being of your community, or just your bottom line? Prove it. Make THAT your priority, and see the colors of humanity for a change. They are more beautiful than your walls can ever hope to be.

I have a better idea...

2009-11-22T18:34:00.005-05:00

EAST PROVIDENCE, R.I. – A month of harsh words between Rep. Patrick Kennedy and a strident critic, Roman Catholic Bishop Thomas Tobin, escalated Sunday when the bishop acknowledged asking Kennedy not to receive Holy Communion because of the Democratic lawmaker's support for abortion rights.

The bishop's attempt to publicly shame Kennedy on his abortion stance comes just a few months after the death of his father, Sen. Edward Kennedy of Massachusetts. Tobin told The Associated Press that the younger Kennedy, who has been in and out of treatment for substance abuse, has been acting "erratically."

Their dispute began in October when Kennedy criticized the nation's Catholic bishops for threatening to oppose an overhaul of the nation's health care system unless lawmakers included tighter restrictions on abortion, which have since been added to the House version of the bill. Tobin said he felt Kennedy made an unprovoked attack on the church and demanded an apology.

"The point is, because of his obstinate ... public support of abortion, which is clearly contrary to an essential teaching of the church of a matter of critical morality ... he is then not properly prepared to receive Holy Communion," Tobin said in an interview Sunday. "No one has a right to receive Holy Communion."

The feud escalated after Kennedy told The Providence Journal in a story published Sunday that Tobin instructed him not to receive Communion. Kennedy also claimed the bishop had told diocesan priests not to give him communion, an allegation that Tobin denied.

Kennedy and his spokeswoman did not return repeated calls from The Associated Press seeking comment.

Tobin said he wrote Kennedy in February 2007 and asked him not to receive Communion because of his voting record supporting abortion rights.

The bishop said his letter was prompted by a statement two months earlier from the nation's Catholic bishops. They said that believers who knowingly and consistently break with church teachings on moral issues such as abortion should refrain from Communion, the focus of Roman Catholic worship.

Abortion is a major concern for the Catholic bishops because opposition to the procedure is based on the church's earliest teachings on preserving human life, which have not changed. By comparison, church teaching on the death penalty is not as definitive and has changed over time, making it difficult for church leaders to demand that Catholic lawmakers agree.

Only a few U.S. bishops have said they would outright deny Holy Communion to a Catholic lawmaker who supports policies that violate church teaching. A larger number of prelates have publicly asked a Catholic politician to voluntarily abstain from the sacrament.

For example, Archbishop Joseph Naumann of the Diocese of Kansas City in Kansas had repeatedly said publicly that former Kansas Gov. Kathleen Sebelius, a Catholic Democrat who supports abortion rights, should stop taking Communion until she changes her stance. Sebelius is now President Barack Obama's secretary of Health and Human Services.

Other Catholic politicians have wrestled with the same issue Kennedy faces.

In 1984, former Democratic New York Gov. Mario Cuomo, a Catholic who supported abortion rights and was at the time a potential presidential candidate, delivered a speech at the University of Notre Dame explaining that Catholic lawmakers shouldn't be pressured by church leaders to work for anti-abortion legislation. He said Sunday it's dangerous for the church to pressure politicians because of the potential for unintended consequences.

"If you're required (by the church) to make everybody follow your Catholic role, then nobody would vote for Catholics because it's clear that when you get the authority, you're going to be guided by your faith," the former governor told The Associated Press.

Cuomo said there are two positions a politician can take: They can oppose church doctrine outright or, as he did, accept church teachings personally but refuse to carry them into the public arena where they would affect people of every faith.

"Don't ask me to make everybody live by it because they are not members of the church," Cuomo said. "If that were the operative rule, how could you get any Catholic politician in office? And would that be better for the Catholic church?"

Catholics seemed divided Sunday by the feud between Kennedy and Tobin.

Nancy Sieger, 49, who attended a celebration Sunday for her old parish church in East Providence, questioned whether Kennedy was being treated more harshly than his father, who also supported abortion rights but was given a funeral Mass presided over by Cardinal Sean O'Malley of Boston.

She said most Americans support a separation of church and state.

"I think that the Church really needs to stay out of it," she said.

Anne Mitchell, 74, said she supported Tobin's attempts to keep strong limits on publicly financed abortion.

"Abortion is wrong. It's always wrong," she said. "Keep abortion out of the bills."

I have a better idea. How about you keep your religion out of MY government! Listen up, Mr. Tobin, you are making a very poor business decision here. Your bosses are not going to like it. You are going to cost them membership with your shenanigans, you hypocritical fruitloop! I am guessing that the "Big Kahuna" is not thrilled with you either.

Allow me to isolate and make clear how incredibly assinine you are. You stated the following, "The point is, because of his obstinate ... public support of abortion, which is clearly contrary to an essential teaching of the church of a matter of critical morality ... he is then not properly prepared to receive Holy Communion," Tobin said in an interview Sunday. "No one has a right to receive Holy Communion."

Read that again, Bishop Flunkie. You do NOT have the right to determine who is and who is not fit to receive communion. That would be up to your god, would it not? You seem to have lost touch with your own teachings, and yet you feel empowered enough to make your little pissing contest with Mr. Kennedy part of your faith. Interesting strategy, however lacking it is in logic. As it stands right now, your faith and the teachings thereof do NOT hold political influence. However, you aparently feel that if you bully Mr. Kennedy long enough, you will somehow rise to the surface of superior morality? WRONG! You are correct about one thing, though. No one DOES have a RIGHT to communion. No one also has the right to impose their religious views upon another by means of political influence. That IS what you are doing, here, correct? You have deduced that if you publically shame Mr. Kennedy and his stand on abortion rights, that you will somehow influence him through religiously indoctrinated guilt to change his stand on this issue, or no longer receive communion.

I have a better idea for Mr. Kennedy. Mr. Kennedy, go online and order communion wafers. You CAN do that, you know. Then take them to any ordained idiot whose parish could use a extra couple of bucks *wink wink* and have them blessed. The devour the whole freakin lot of them. Do you feel "closer to god" now? I didn't think so. Heaven forbid, we aknowledge what a scam the humans who run your faith are really perpetrating. Mr. Kennedy, hold on to your faith. Believe in your god. The act of receiving communion is simply ritualistic in nature, and is enforced and manipulated by human beings. Bishop Fuckhead has NO right to tell you whether or not you are "fit to receive communion". He seems to have allowed his "power" to go to his head. You probably should not attend church and drink the wine either, in light of your "substance abuse" issues. My guess is that Bishop Assclown hasn't quite made that connection yet.

Hey Bishop Cornhole, when you assholes pay taxes, you can have an opinion in our politics. Until then, please shove your self righteous religious bullshit straight where your obession lies...your asshole. You are a piss poor representative of people of faith. You have NO RIGHT to impose your views upon another man simply because you do not like his political stand. Now, Mr. Kennedy has a choice. He can abide by your nonsense, and change his stand, or he can continue to practice his faith and tell you to go fuck yourself. Here is the funny part. Let's see how well your bullshit holds up against his career and his income. Much like the organization that YOU work for, his is also driven by popular opinion and the almighty dollar. The difference is, his pays him and yours takes his money. Gee, I wonder who will win. Fuckhead. You don't even know the rules of your own game. Go back to school, son. Daddy is gonna be PISSED!

As for you, 74 year old Anne Mitchell, you are correct about one thing, you just seem to have missed a few words. Let me help you. It should read as follows, "Keep religiously influenced opinion about abortion out of the bills." There, isn't that better now? Listen up, Anne. I have always heard the phrase, "respect your elders". That has never made much sense to me. I can understand respect of your fellow humans, but I refuse to give you more because you have lived longer. You get from me exactly what you deserve, and that is a good swift kick in your shriveled up judgemental ass. If you think that just because you are an old bitter, judgemental, bible beating shrew that I am going to let you off of the hook for such blatent ignorance, you are mistaken. Let me explain it in terms you can understand. Let not the ignorant of the herd become the shepherd. For through his own greed and desires, he will inflict upon the loyal undue and unjust judgement, for only I can cast the hand of righteousness.

You caught me, I made that up. I bet you still googled it, didn't you? Sounds real enough to pass for the same bullshit that you fools have been spewing for hundreds of years. So, without years of translation and transcription, I will tell you what it means. According to YOUR rules, you cannot judge another. Only your god can do that. Uh oh, looks like Annie won't be receiving communion. After all, you are to be spreading the word of your god, not passing judgment or compromising with the enemy.

Don't sweat it though, Annie. Hopefully they will rewrite and change those rules before you croak. One can only have faith. Good luck.

Going, Going...Aren't you gone yet?????

2009-11-14T07:49:00.004-05:00

"Going Rogue", huh? Sarah, Sarah, Sarah, are you EVER going to learn? Now, don't get me wrong, I do love the irony of that title. I mean who would expect a nasty, attention seeking, stupid hypocrite to write a book about how she was treated unfairly, and made the victim. Ok, so there isn't really all that much irony, after all, you are "The Maverick". There is nothing more "rogue" or "maverick like" than writing a book trashing everyone and anyone in the hopes of advancing your career, or bank account, whatever your intention is. Sarah, it has been done a million times over. You aren't "rogue". You are hopeless.

It is incredible that you still have not grasped that there is a bigger world outside of Wasilla. Sarah, I know that many people have tried to explain to you how things work in the real world, but for some reason you are resistant to education. I am going to do my best to speak your language and see if maybe, just maybe, you can grasp what I am saying here.

You weren't running for Homecoming Queen. Senator McCain was. Do you understand what that means? That means that you were just hair and make-up behind the scenes. You were just there to make him look good. If McCain had WON, you would be second runner up to the queen. You know what that means, right? That means unless McCain is unable to fulfill his duties as queen, you simply wait around smiling and hoping that he gets caught having made a tasteful spread in Playboy. THEN, you can step in and wear the crown. Unfortunately, you pushed the queen down the steps BEFORE she was elected. It was a good plan in that Lifetime movie that you watched, but not really a good plan in reality, Sarah. You are supposed to push her when no one is looking, NOT when the cameras are rolling. Cameras record more than just crowns and smiles, sweetie. Here, in the real world, we expect more than just a cheap smile and a cutsie wink. We expect knowledge of the issues, in other words, the "interview" portion of the pageant is more important than the swimmsuit portion. I know that is different than what you are used to, but this isn't a Wasilla popularity contest. This was an election for the Presidency of The United States. It isn't just like the pageants you entered when you were young, just on a bigger scale. You should have watched the end of that movie, Sarah. I saw it too. The bitchy cheerleader that pushed the popular girl down the steps DID NOT win anything. She was disqualified and shunned from all social circles in her school. Do you know who ended up winning that crown, Sarah? It was the girl that no one expected to, the one who really wanted and deserved the crown because she didn't participate in the catty in fighting of the other contestants. "Her" name was Barack Obama.

Now Sarah, you have written a book. That very statement makes me chuckle. YOU writing a book conjures up a visual that makes me laugh out loud. I can just see you now, hair all perfectly in place, prop glasses on, legs crossed, and hunkered over a keyboard with your two index fingers poised above the keys, tongue protruding from the corner of your mouth, and a strained expression on your face trying to remember the "i" before "e" rule. You didn't really write this book, honey. You bitched and moaned the same old crap into a device that records your idiocy, and then someone with punctuation and grammar skills wrote it for you.

Sarah, do you really think that anyone gives a shit about what catfights you had with whom in the McCain camp? No honey, we still don't care. The only people who will read, and care about what is contained within your book are the people who voted for McCain and defended you. They are just looking for ANY reason to justify the brain fart that made them think you were, in any way, qualified and competent to do this job. They can read all about how you were manipulated and duped by everyone who you came in contact with. Now pay attention here, Sarah. If you are THAT easily swayed and manipulated, do you REALLY think that you are capable of dealing on an international level? I want you to think about that. You can't just bake warm cookies and send them to the Middle East wrapped in pink cellophane. Kim Jong Il doesn't care that your kid has Down Syndrome. As a matter of fact, he would tell you that you should have killed him and eaten him for dinner. He isn't very nice, Sarah. He is like Simon Cowell on American Idol. He will make you cry. I don't think you are ready for that yet.

Katie Couric is really a thorn in your backside, isn't she? Don't you just hate those smart girls that run the school newspaper? They are so irritating with all of their nosy questions. They spend way too much time in the school library and not nearly enough time behind the bleachers to really understand what you are all about. Sarah, she doesn't want to be your friend. She knows that you will just marry the quarterback of the football team, move into a trailer and breed. She is looking for a career, and using you to accomplish that. You should stay away from girls like her, she reads books. Here is what you should do, instead of writing about how she was so mean to you. You should start an "I hate Katie" page on Facebook. That way, every time you think about how much you hate her, you can just post your thoughts there. Other people who hate Katie, like Kate Gosselin, the Octomom, and Ann Coulter can join your page and comment too. This way, trees don't have to die so that your snarky nonsense can be published.

Oh, Levi. This is what we like to call a "political liability", Sarah. I am glad to see that you left him out of the book. I just couldn't handle hearing him go on to Katie Couric about your late night toking on the bong, or the swing in your bedroom. I have a feeling that is about all Levi can come up with in regard to "dirt" on you. The sad thing is you actually fear him! Do you really think that good ol' Levi grasped ANY part of the political goings on around him? Of all the people that you have pissed off and pissed on throughout your "career", LEVI is the one you fear? This really reflects your own understanding of what is and is not important to the American People outside of Wasilla. You paraded this kid around like a deer trapped in headlights, claiming that he was going to be a responsible father. Now he is posing for Playgirl and has dumped your daughter. This is not a good refection on your decision making skills, Sarah. It is not Levi, himself, that is the liability here. It is YOUR handling of the situation. It is time to grow up, and accept responsibility for your own actions, honey.

Sarah, we all have family members that would make us cringe if we put them in front of a camera. Just ask Bill Clinton. He will explain it to you, in a way that you can understand. He speaks "ignorant hick". The difference is, most people who succeed do so by NOT claiming that their family is anything better than anyone else's. The difference is, they actually mean it. They don't try to do things like, make drinking and driving legal because Uncle John has a drinking problem. Do you understand what I am saying? Bill will explain it to you, assuming he will take your calls. Tell him you are considering taking an internship, then he may pick up.

Now here it comes. It is time for some tough love. Sarah, you are not special. You are not smart. You are pretty "for your age". You have a limited future in local politics. You could probably win queen of a state fair somewhere in the deep south. Other than that, you are finished, Sarah. It is time to go home, pay attention to those kids you claim to live and die for, and get out of the national spotlight. You have embarrassed yourself, and everyone who has supported you. No, I am not jealous, Sarah. I am smart. I am kind of like Katie, only without a camera. I DO have a voter registration card though. It is time for me to tell you that you are more likely to see monkeys fly out of my ass, than for me to EVER vote for you for ANYTHING, let alone President of The United States. I am not alone, Sarah. We are like the pod people in that late night movie you watched the other night. We are many, and we keep multiplying. We are the smart people who are tired of the daytime drama that politics has become. You are symbolic of everything we hate about the political arena, Sarah. Oh, how do I say it so that you can understand?

You would have sold more DVD's titled "Doing Rogue" than you are going to sell of your book "Going Rogue". That is all you are, my dear. You came in last in America's popularity contest, but you still have a shot in porn. Give it a try honey. I think you can still reach your full potential.

Hey Obama, this has a nice ring to it, doesn't it?

Palin 2012

American Heroes

2009-10-26T19:04:00.010-04:00

Here is Mark McGwire’s chance. For the last four years, he has hidden inside his gated community in Southern California while his reputation and legacy withered among a public that branded him a coward who never followed through on a promise he made under oath before Congress.

One of the lasting images of Mark McGwire is his evasive performance before Congress in 2005.
Now, redemption calls. The St. Louis Cardinals hired McGwire on Monday as their new hitting coach, exposing him to vouching for the very words on which he turned his back. On March 19, 2005, in between informing a roomful of elected officials probing baseball’s steroid problem that “I’m not here to talk about the past,” McGwire found himself engaged in a particularly telling exchange with Rep. Elijah Cummings (D-Md.).
Cummings: “You’re willing to be a national spokesman?”
McGwire: “I’d be a great one.”
Cummings: “So, that means you would do it?”
McGwire: “Be a spokesperson?”
Cummings: “Yes.”
McGwire: “Absolutely.”
If, by absolutely, McGwire meant he’d completely ignore the steroid issue short of a few token donations from his foundation, well, then he’s been a paragon of spokesmandom.

Embrace and own his errors. Speak with candor. Convince a public that he turned his back on four years ago.
Be a hero. The real kind this time.

http://sports.yahoo.com/mlb/news?slug=jp-mcgwire102509&prov=yhoo&type=lgns

Oh, the moral and ethical dilemmas that the almighty U. S of A face. Are there not more important things in this country than whether or not an overpaid "professional athlete" takes a "performance enhancing drug"? I love that term, "performance enhancing drug". I bet their wives would disagree. When I read things like this, and the pseudo disgust for athletes who don't accomplish their fame "naturally", I shake my head in wonder. I hear all kinds of trumped up outrage over some kind of "betrayal" at the hands of men like Mark McGuire. I was an athlete, a long time ago. The human body has limitations. Athletes push their bodies and minds beyond what is possible. That is how they become the "best", at least until someone else pushes further.

The question that we all need to ask ourselves is, why do they push so hard, and so far? The answers are actually pretty simple. The first is fame. The second is money, and the third is personal achievement. What are they achieving? They have the ability to say, "I am the best", or "my team is the best". They have thousands of people adoring them. They make millions of dollars, and live lavish lifestyles. It was YOUR demand to see the bigger and better athlete, it was YOUR willingness to pay hundreds of dollars for their jersey, it was YOUR need to be a part of a group that can claim "bragging" rights for your city that created these monsters. YOU are the ones who tell your children that they need to destroy their young, developing bodies for fame and fortune. YOU are the ones who feel the need to live vicariously through your children and communities. Yet, you are then the ones who express outrage at the idea that they have taken a drug that enhances their abilities. Why? That answer is also a simple one. Those drugs are harmful, and the people who opt NOT to take them are at an unfair disadvantage. Right? Oh come on now, you don't care about an unfair advantage when you are demanding more and more from your children and athletes, unless it is YOUR child, or team who can't make the cut.

Why do we place so much emphasis on the ability to defeat another at a game? This is what all of this boils down to. You aren't racing to help mankind, or expand your knowledge. You are racing to win a game. Baseball is a game. Football is a game. Hockey is a game. Why are these men held to a standard of being a "hero"? Simply, because they were willing to push what was a natural ability to the breaking point and beyond? Many professional athletes donate time and money to their communities. That's great. Where did that money come from? The community who PAID to see them perform! Do you really think that they TRULY give more of a shit about the community than their tax breaks? You are truly naive if you think that a person whose natural drive to defeat another also has the spirit of a true humanitarian.

So now, Mark Mcguire has all but been shunned from public view. He has been cast out like a leper, and why? Because you are pissed off that you made a professional "game player" a hero to your sons and daughters. You trusted a man that you don't even know to be a role model for your children. HA! The joke is on you, and he has made you look like the fool that you are. I say, good for him! He took your money, your adoration, your trust and your status as "hero" and laughed all the way to the bank. The true American spirit shines through. Did you learn anything from his "betrayal"? Nope. You just trusted someone else, because you are an idiot.

I say, let them take steroids. Let them pump whatever they want into their bodies. Hell, give them to your kids! Why stop at dragging a crying child to the fifth practice that week? Hey, if you want to be the best, you have to be willing to do what it takes, right? If you want to be a hero, you have make sacrifices, people. I mean, heroes do that. Think about our war heroes. We have Vietnam, Gulf War, and who knows what will come from "operation Bush lie". They are suffering chemical effects, yet they aren't living a lavish lifestyle and followed by thousands of adoring fans. I figure that if you are to obtain the status of "hero", you should be as fucked up as the REAL heroes that we ignore everyday!

That sounds kind of extreme, doesn't it? Well, it isn't. It is about perspective and priorities. If you have made a hero out of someone who plays a game for a living, then you are a poor excuse for a parent and human being. Don't pretend to be so damn offended when you get caught up in your own stupidity. I guarantee that 75% of the names on your adored jerseys have taken some form of "enhancement drug" at one time or another. You just don't care because they haven't been caught. You will be happy as long as you have your precious titles and trophies. So, why not revel in your pathetic greed? Let them eat roids all day long! Just think of the extra entertainment value that you will get from a roid raging fight on the field! Now THAT is worth $600 a ticket. If you are going to worship gladiators, then put a damn lion in the ring, only the lion is simply a metaphor for steroids.

PS, Make sure you read the warning label on your child's ADD or ADHD or whatever three letter disorder medication you give them. You want to make sure it won't interfere with the steroids. Come on, people, to be the best, you have to be willing to do WHATEVER IT TAKES! YOU are the ones making the demands. Put YOUR child in the arena, and enjoy! Maybe someday, he or she can be a hero too.

Change

2009-10-25T10:01:00.005-04:00

On occasion, I have a mellow moment. Ironically enough, the most recent one came while watching Wanda Sykes new stand-up act, "Ima Be Me". Wanda has always caught my attention as an incredibly talented female comedienne. I was listening to her performance, and then I became very aware of what I was witnessing. I was sitting in my middle-class, suburban home watching an African American lesbian perform to a sold out crowd. Her material consisted of her personal life, relationships, politics and aging. She was brilliant.

Her performance prompted me to stop, and think about female comediennes throughout history. I remembered watching The Carol Burnett show, as a kid. I loved her TV spin off, "Mama's Family". Carol Burnett mastered the art of "intelligent slapstick comedy". Joan Rivers shocked the world with her crass and "in your face" style of comedy. People love to hate Joan, and THAT is what has rocketed her to being one of the most reconizable female comediennes of all time. Gilda Radner, and her character "Rosanne Rosanne a dana" sticks in my mind as one of the first memorable performances on Saturday Night Live. Ethyl Merman's performance in "It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World" launched some of my favorite "one liners". She was not known for being a comedic performer, but her natural timing was undeniable. Lily Tomlin graced our screens with timeless comedy performances like "Nine to Five", and "All of Me". Rosanne Barr was the trailer park queen of the 1990s. Her ability to mock herself and "tell it how it is", made her one of the most loved and hated women to ever step foot in the comedy arena.

There has been a transition for women comediennes throughout time. Women were typically "just not funny". I find that still, to be quite true, in many cases. The female performers of the past have been forced to stay within certain confines of what was, and was not acceptable for a woman to say. We were allowed to make jokes about marriage, children and female reproductive issues. That was about it. How many different ways can you make a joke about a tampon, not wanting to have sex, and the perils of motherhood, before it just ceases to be funny? I can tell you that it wore pretty thin in the 1980s. This was the decade when women tried to "come out of their shell" a little bit at a time. We began using harsh profanity and shocking speech to get a laugh. The idea that a woman can tell someone to "go fuck themselves" on stage was a foreign concept to many. Comedians like Eddie Murphy, Richard Prior, Sam Kinison and Dennis Leary had a lock on that market. I think back on the comedy of Lucille Ball, and I have to tell you, I do not find her one bit funny or entertaining. I find her style of comedy to be very dated to the time, and an incredibly poor portrayal of the American woman. Her character was based on the expected and stupid antics of a housewife, and based on the perception of what men wanted women to be, and how we were perceived as just stupid, babbling, air-headed women.

So here we are, Wanda Sykes and Lucille Ball. Wow, what a stark contrast in style. Thanks to comediennes like Joan Rivers, Rosanne Barr, Mo Nique, and Ellen Degeneres, here comes the REAL American woman. Wanda is, both as a comedienne and a person, what embodies the true American woman. She stands in the face of racial and sexual orientation hatred, and says "FUCK YOU, I am going to be me!" These women are CRUSHING the barriers that have been in place for decades. Women aren't just "the silly, stupid" wives of the past. We are forces to be reckoned with. We are smart, witty, quick on our feet, and will show men that we can pack a sold out show by saying the very things that scare the hell out of them. Nice job ladies. Like them or hate them, either way, you will tune in either to laugh or shake your head in disgust. No matter what, you will tune in, and that's where those walls come tumbling down.

This is an incredible time that we are lucky enough to be a part of. There will always be barriers to be torn down in our society. As long as people rule the world, it will be riddled with hate, intolerance, and predjudice. However, in my short thirty five years of life, I have seen walls come down at a rate that, from what I can see, is unprecedented. Wanda Sykes symbolizes the rise of racial minorities, women, and homosexuals. Her success is ALL of our success. Attitudes are changing, and people are tired of hearing "it is ok for you to be whatever, as long as i don't have to see it." Well, folks, not only are you seeing it, but you are paying your hard earned money to see it. Now, THAT is change, real change.

The Prototype...

2009-10-24T14:10:00.003-04:00

skip to main | skip to sidebar

Those of you who are familiar with language construction of various cultures and ethnicities know that there are, within one language, many times, several dialects. I have discovered that within the Americanized, bastardized version of English, we too, have different dialects. I am going to create a new standard for dialect detection. It is called "listen to an asshole on their cellphone in public." It is stunning, to me, how many people think that they are the only ones within hearing distance of their conversation.

I spend quite a bit of time in and around the general public. My hope for retirement is to move to a deserted island or mountaintop where there are no cellphones or people who can speak. The only acceptable community will be a mute one. The greatest irritant in regard to cellphone use, is when you are in a confined space, with no exit strategy. For example, I was on an elevator yesterday, and an Asian woman entered while talking on her cellphone. By talking, I mean screaming in a language that I could not understand even if I had a lifetime of study to perfect. I was married to a Chinese man for ten years, and the only thing that I retained was how to swear, and count to ten. That being said, I can also tell you that the Chinese language is one that is spoken at a higher volume than many others. It always sounds like they are pissed off, yet they could be wishing someone happy freakin birthday. This woman was no exception. I wanted to take her phone and shove it so far up her ass that she would need Roto Rooter to get it out. Hey lady, the accoustics in an elevator are NOT condusive to screaming. If the person on the other end of the phone was not deaf before you called them, they are now. There were several other people on the elevator who also seemed to be agitated by her conversation, yet you never hear anyone speak up and tell them to SHUT THE FUCK UP! My guess is that she got a free pass because it was assumed that she would not understand them. Wrong again. SHUT THE FUCK UP, is universal, give it a try once, you will see. Ten bucks say that she speaks English when THAT flies out of your mouth!

When I think of public confined spaces, elevators are the number one social anxiety trap. There is a close second, and that is ANY form of public transportation. I have to ride a small shuttle bus from my place of employment to my parking lot. This ride is, on average, twenty to thirty minutes long. I would like to introduce you to who I have designated to be "the prototype" for EVERYTHING that irritates me about the American social climate. This twenty something woman is the bane of my existance everyday at 3:40pm. I want you to remember one VERY important fact. The ID badge that is clipped to her shirt reads "RN", as in, REGISTERED NURSE! This is the woman who cares for you, and is your lifeline to the doctor that will potentially save your life. Be afraid, be very, very afraid. She enters the shuttle, on her fucking phone. It never fails, she sits right accross from me with her oversized bag/purse/luggage carry-on, whatever the hell it is. I know that you could easily pack enough food to feed a small third world country in it. She always sits in the seat by the window, and places that ugly piece of animal hide on the seat next to her, thus preventing anyone from sitting with her. She then crosses her legs, forcing one knee into the back of the seat in front of her with NO regard for the person sitting there. Her makeup looks like she just walked head on into a wet painting. She holds her oversized phone to her ear and taps her acrylic nails on the case, as if she is sending Morse Code to the other person. The bad news is, they couldn't possibly decipher it over the incessant verbal diarrhea that spews from her bright pink glittery lips. I can't even describe the torture that is felt while she inanely shares every minute of her pathetic existance with the other person. Because of this woman, I have developed an aversion to the word, "like". I know that you are nodding your head in agreement now. We have all heard teenagers abuse the word, but come on you dipshit, you are NOT fifteen anymore. PLEASE develop some form of coherent communication skills, because if I have to hear THIS ONE MORE TIME....

"So, like, I was like so tired last night. Then, like, Travis called and like was like pissed off cuz I didn't answer my phone. Then he like texted me like thirty times like in a row. Then, I like told him that like I can't always, like, answer my phone. I am like, a good friend, but like, I have my limits, like you know? So anyways, like when I like finally talked to him when I was done working, like he said that like he was looking for a job and like that he was thinking about finding a new place to like live. I was like, well, Travis, you like have no money and all that. Then like he had the like nerve to like tell me to like mind my own business! YEAH! I KNOW! So anyways, like when I was done talking to him I like got a text from Abby, and she like told me that like Travis was like pissed at me and all that. I was like, whatever, he is like so immature."

Now, continue that line of thought for another twenty nine minutes, or so. Is this a new dialect within our language that I am unfamiliar with, or is this just more of the same uneducated stupidity that runs rampid in our society? I am going with option "B". I came to that conclusion by putting all of the pieces of the puzzle together. Combine blatent disregard for other people with over self absorption, and you have a nurse who wears pink sweat pants that say "PINK" on the ass. We know they are pink, asshole. OH, you want us to look at your ass? Ok, then get off of the fucking phone, go to the gym, and tone that thing up a bit. THEN you don't have to draw attention to it with print, moron.

I swear that one day soon, I am going to walk up to her and ask to speak to the person on the other end of that phone. I want to ask them two things, firstly, how the fuck do you listen to this everyday? My guess is that the response will be, "Like, who is this?" Then secondly, I will ask her to PLEASE tell this stupid bitch to shut the hell up! I am assuming that it will not pan out so well for me. I know this because of the "birds of a feather" thing. I couldn't bear THIS as a response...

"Like, I don't know who you like think you are, but Alicia is like my bestest friend in the whole world. We like grew up together and like she is so totally the best friend I like ever had, so like, if you don't like her then, like that ain't my problem. Like, I don't know anyone else who like can wear Crocs and and sweatpants and like STILL look good, you know what I'm sayin? So like who don't you like just mind your own business and like leave her alone."

I would LOVE to mind my own business, bitch! That is the problem here, I CAN'T because my head is all clogged up with cheap designer perfume, and the word "LIKE". Stupid twit.

I used to think that texting was stupid and pointless. I now see the necessity for it. We have regressed to communication via the written word after decades of developing technology that allows verbal, personal communication. Why would we do that? Ask "Like Chick". Better yet, ask the people who suffer through the idiotic rantings of her loosly developed vocabulary. Given the choice between hearing one more story about Travis and hearing the beeping of the text, I GUARANTEE they will choose the beeping. Congratulations, "Like Chick", you have become more annoying than a rythmic pattern of beeping and clicking. You ARE the prototype for everything that is wrong with our society, you moronic, self absorbed, obnoxious, ignorant fool.

Who needs talent, when there are Britney and "T"

2009-10-19T17:48:00.009-04:00

I made a serious error in judgement this past weekend. I actually tuned in to MTV for a short period of time. I would like to thank the mindless, no talent, freaks who produce this crap for giving me a few more lines on my forehead. I sat there, entranced with my head tilted like a dog who just heard a high pitched noise. Was it the staggering amount of natural talent and charisma of the performers that entranced me? No. Was it the quality programming of the "shows" that balance the sheer genius of the performers? No. I am actually having a difficult time processing and explaining what I just witnessed. However, I will remove the brain to mouth filter, and give it my best shot. (Hey, Lady Ga Ga and Kanye West, that means you.)

I would like to know who determined that, in order to be a singing and dancing performer, that you don't actually have to possess any of those traits, or abilities. Britney, would you PLEASE get the hell off of my television and out of the news! For the love of everything good in the world, would you just admit that you have NO TALENT and a good plastic surgeon who rebuilds you once every two years? You are one more dye job and peel away from Joan Rivers, for gawd's sake. You are NOT hot. Let me say that again. The only "men" who find you hot are children who still look under their sister's Barbie Doll's skirt, HOPING to find an explanation for why they wake up with sticky sheets. Was that to the point enough for you? You are a horrible performer, your looks were always mediocre, at best, you are a disgusting pseudo engineered human being, and the whole world laughs at you. I think that you and Kanye West could have a beautiful relationship, if you moved back home. Call the mother ship, your time here is done.

Now, I understand that the pop culture music industry is sorely lacking any semblance of real talent, but for the love of FUCK, how the hell do you justify filling the empty space between Lady Ga Ga and Chris Brown with a show entitled, "Jackass". For those of you who have not seen this show, I will briefly attempt to describe it. I want you to imagine every person, in your life, who you said "He is going to wind up dead, in rehab, or prison." and put them all on one TV show. That pretty much sums it up. Oh, except for the fact that they also staple their own balls to their legs and drink horse semen. You read that right. I will give you a minute to digest that. (pun intended). Are you back now? Good, because I want you to realize that our society has devolved to a point where the most idiotic of people have become "famous", and have gathered a following greater than Farrakhan's million man march. Maybe if T Pain had thought of it, more than half a million people would have shown up. Speaking of no talent. T Pain, honey, please listen to me. We know why you have to use that microphone. You suck. (you should be thankful, you got off easy.) Actually, I lied. T Pain you suck SO much, that I feel the need to continue. I think we need to take a look at just a small part of one of your works of pure art.

YEAH!
yea, yeah!
Woa, Ohh
nuh-nuh nuh Shawty
nuh-nuh nuh Shawty
nuh-nuh nuh Shawty
Don't chop me, Shawty don't screw me
Shawty don't chop me, Shawty don't screw me
Shawty don't chop me, Shawty don't screw me
Yeah
yea, Yeah

You guys think that I made that up, don't you? I didn't. The credit goes to the pure genius of the music industry combined with the limitless talent of "artists" like T Pain.
Look at those freakin lyrics, people. First of all, I would like to know the difference between "Yeah" and "Yea". Is that just so it LOOKS like there are actually more words to this "song"? Why the dash between the first set of nuh-nuh and not the second? I don't mean to insult your artistic license, T. Can I call you T? I think I will. You managed to make an entire verse of music using exactly four words that actually exist in the english language. That is very impressive. By the way, T, unless your "girlfriend/wife" *translation* "Shawty" is short, what the FUCK does that mean? I give up. I should have just stuck with, "you suck". You do.

Pop culture has it's place in this world. It can provide cheap entertainment, (unless you want to see them live or buy anything with their "designer label" on it) for those who don't really like to put too much thought into what is quality and what is not. There are BRILLIANT musicians and talent that knows no limits, yet we are indoctrinated and obsessed with idiots like Britney, Kanye, and, as I like to call him, T. What happened to music being a respected and revered form of communication and expression? I can tell you, it still exists. It is out there, people. Get the hell away from the boob tube, and PAY ATTENTION. There is an entire world of unique and beautiful talent out there. I know that many of you also thought that Bob Ross was an AMAZING painter, but trust me, Van Vogh would cut YOUR ear off for saying so.

I think my good friend, T, said it best,

Now you've officially been chopped and screwed
screwed-screwed, chopped-chopped and screwed
You've officially been dance-dance screwed
And ewed-ewed, chopped screwed-screwed
You've officially been chopped and screwed

*applause*

Holy shit.

Balloon Heads

2009-10-17T23:27:00.010-04:00

FORT COLLINS, Colo. – A Colorado sheriff said he was pursuing criminal charges in the case of a 6-year-old boy who vanished into the rafters of his garage while the world thought he was zooming through the sky in a flying saucer-like helium balloon.
The boy's parents, Richard and Mayumi Heene, met with Larimer County investigators for much of the afternoon, but Sheriff Jim Alderden didn't say who would be charged or what the charges would be.
Alderden didn't call Thursday's hours-long drama a hoax, but he expressed disappointment that he couldn't level more serious charges in the incident, which sent police and the military scrambling to save young Falcon Heene as millions of worried television viewers watched.
"We were looking at Class 3 misdemeanor, which hardly seems serious enough given the circumstances," Alderden said. "We are talking to the district attorney, federal officials to see if perhaps there aren't additional federal charges that are appropriate in this circumstance."
He said deputies were seeking a search warrant for the family's home, and there would be more information at a news conference Sunday.
After the sheriff went inside, Richard Heene and his wife walked out. As reporters yelled questions, all Heene said was, "I was talking to the sheriff's department just now." He then walked to his car with his wife and a friend, and they drove away.
The Heenes were expected to speak to reporters outside their home later Saturday, after a strange day that began with Richard Heene knocking on the windows of journalists camped outside his home and promising a "big announcement." A few hours later, he did an about-face when he told reporters that they should leave questions in a cardboard box on the front doorstep.
As Heene walked away, a reporter shouted, "Can you tell us once and for all if this is a hoax?"
"Absolutely no hoax. I want your questions in the box," Heene said, waving a cardboard container before going back into his home. A circus-like atmosphere formed outside, including men holding signs and occasionally yelling "balloon boy." One sign read, "Put balloon boy on TV: America's Most Wanted."
Other gawkers carried aluminum-foil stovetop popcorn makers that resembled the silvery balloon launched from the family's backyard Thursday, with 6-year-old Falcon Heene believed to be onboard.
While Richard and Mayumi Heene were at the sheriff's office, the couple's three sons remained home, apparently being watched by sheriff's officials. Authorities wouldn't comment on what was happening.
Alderden had said that he wanted to re-interview the family after Falcon turned to his dad during a CNN interview and said "you said we did this for a show" when asked why he didn't come out of his hiding place. Then Falcon got sick during two separate TV interviews when asked why he hid.
The balloon was supposed to be tethered to the ground when it lifted off, and no one was supposed to be aboard. A video of the launch shows the family counting down in unison, "3, 2, 1," before Richard Heene pulls a cord, setting the balloon into the air.
"Whoa!" one of the boys exclaims. Then his father says in disbelief, "Oh, my God!" He then says to someone, "You didn't put the (expletive) tether down!" and he kicks the wood frame that had held the balloon.
Falcon's brother said he saw him inside the compartment before it took off and that's why they thought he was in there when it launched. Heene said he had yelled at Falcon before the launch for getting inside.
Alderden said earlier that he thinks it's likely that Falcon ran off because he was scared of getting in trouble, later falling asleep in his hiding spot. He said he doubted that such a hyperactive boy could be ordered to stay quiet for the five hours he was missing.
Over the years, Richard Heene has worked as a storm chaser, a handyman and contractor, and an aspiring reality-TV star.
He and his family appeared on the ABC reality show "Wife Swap," and the show's producer said it had a show in development with the Heenes but the deal is now off. TLC also said Heene had pitched a reality show to the network months ago, but it passed on the offer.
Despite his attempts to get on TV, Heene insisted Saturday that he didn't know what kinds of questions were being asked about him because he didn't have cable.
"I'm going to place the box out front. Please write your questions down, because friends are telling me they're saying this and that. I have no idea what the news is saying," Heene said.

______________________________________________________

I guess that since this stupid crap won't die, I will comment. Where do I begin with this one? Can you say, ATTENTION WHORES???? Let us look at the facts here. This "father of the year" and, apparently mute wife, have attempted on several occasions to get their moment in the national spotlight via "reality TV." Well, I have to tell you, this is about as unreal as it gets. I would LOVE to know what this moron pitched as his idea for his "reality show".....

"Hey, uh....I have an idear. Y'all can come here to Colorada, and bring them thar movie cameras. I got me a big Jiffy Pop thingy, and I was fixin on launchin my yungun up in it. What y'all think?"

That balloon is not the only thing full of hot air. The concept of a mother and father having a "final countdown" to launch, but yet NOT doing a headcount of their children, is well, insulting to anyone with an IQ over 75. Let me get this straight. This idiot prepares to launch the balloon. He KNOWS that his son is ,apparently, proned to climbing aboard. Then he procedes to swear at his other son for not tethering the stupid balloon. I just read that again, and the song from Munchkin Land ran through my head. "Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!" Coincidentally, the "missing child" just HAPPENS to be alseep in the rafters. Huh? Is he Anne Frank for god's sake?

This, unfortunately is not the funniest (by funny, I mean disgusting) part of this sideshow. There are people ACTUALLY camped outside of his house, and their only purpose there is to mock this family with Jiffy Pop. Come on, that's just a LITTLE funny. What I wonder is, where do these groups of people come from? This can't be the way that these "onlookers" form together...

"Hey Bill, what are you doing today?"

"Oh Jed, I was just gonna mow the lawn, then I was headin' over to that "balloon boy's" house with some Jiffy Pop. You wanna come? It should be a real hoot and holler!"

"Hell yeah, Bill! I will make me some signs that say "balloon boy"., and maybe we can get on TV too!"

"Aight Jed, see ya there! Bring the yunguns, they can fetch the beer!"

I shudder to think of any other possibility.

Come to think of it, I wish that I had made the trip, myself! I can tell you why. I would LOVE to see the questions that the media representatives put in the cardboard box on the front "stoop". I would have turned it into a "suggestion box". My first suggestion? Don't breed again. Thank you. That is all I have to say.

This is not worth further attention. Thank you for wasting the last 3 minutes of your life that you will never get back.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/ap_on_re_us/us_boy_in_balloon

Excuse me, George? Could I have a word with you?

2009-10-12T17:18:00.009-04:00

NEWARK, Del. — Finding character witnesses when you are 6 years old is not easy. But there was Zachary Christie last week at a school disciplinary committee hearing with his karate instructor and his mother’s fiancé by his side to vouch for him.

Zachary’s offense? Taking a camping utensil that can serve as a knife, fork and spoon to school. He was so excited about recently joining the Cub Scouts that he wanted to use it at lunch. School officials concluded that he had violated their zero-tolerance policy on weapons, and Zachary was suspended and now faces 45 days in the district’s reform school.

“It just seems unfair,” Zachary said, pausing as he practiced writing lower-case letters with his mother, who is home-schooling him while the family tries to overturn his punishment.
Spurred in part by the Columbine and Virginia Tech shootings, many school districts around the country adopted zero-tolerance policies on the possession of weapons on school grounds. More recently, there has been growing debate over whether the policies have gone too far.
But, based on the code of conduct for the Christina School District, where Zachary is a first grader, school officials had no choice. They had to suspend him because, “regardless of possessor’s intent,” knives are banned.
But the question on the minds of residents here is: Why do school officials not have more discretion in such cases?

Still, some school administrators argue that it is difficult to distinguish innocent pranks and mistakes from more serious threats, and that the policies must be strict to protect students.
“There is no parent who wants to get a phone call where they hear that their child no longer has two good seeing eyes because there was a scuffle and someone pulled out a knife,” said George Evans, the president of the Christina district’s school board.

For Delaware, Zachary’s case is especially frustrating because last year state lawmakers tried to make disciplinary rules more flexible by giving local boards authority to, “on a case-by-case basis, modify the terms of the expulsion.”

Um, Excuse me, Mr. Evans. Can I call you George? I think I will. You are missing your calling, sir. You really should be on the parole board at a maximum security prison that houses covicted child rapists and murderers. I really think that you should probably pull your head from your rectal cavity, and look at the facts here. This is a six year old child, you jackass. Do you even know what "zero tolerance" even means? I bet you don't. First of all, this whole drama scene was begun over the Columbine shootings. There is a key word there, do you see it? I bet not, again. The word is "shootings". The last time I checked, a knife can't shoot someone. So, try to follow along here. I assume that the "zero tolerance" for knives is related to the guns that killed the children at Columbine? Am I correct? OK then, herein lies your problem, genius. Where does it stop? A sharpened pencil is a weapon in the hands of an angry child. A putty knife in art class is a weapon in the hands of an angry child. A stapler is a weapon....oh hell, a book is a lethal weapon if swung with enough force. Do you see where I am going with this?

Where is the genius "think tank" that came up with what defines a weapon? This is why it is clearly written that the school should use discretion when administering punishment for "breaking the zero tolerance" law. How does suspending a child, who most likely, has NO IDEA what he has done wrong, solve the problem of violence in the schools? You most likely just aided in creating a child with emotional issues when it comes to his treatment within the school environment. What did YOU take to school when you were just a 6 year old boy, George? A protractor? How about a plastic knife and fork set in your lunchbox? How would YOU have felt if you were humiliated because some jackass decided that it was a "lethal weapon". Would you be the all powerful and all knowing MR. EVANS? I bet the kids have come up with some really good names for YOU over the years. They would probably carve them into their desks, but they can't have knives. OH, but they CAN carve them with a sharp piece of plastic that they pulled from their chair. By the way, they probably picked at their chair out of sheer boredom with your curriculum. I only guess that because you CLEARLY have your head so far up the "politically correct" asses of your administration, that you most likely, don't have much time to focus on mundane things like TEACHING the kids. Just a stab in the dark, George.

Now, don't get all pouty and defensive on me here, George. The truth hurts, I know. Imagine the hurt that you are causing this child, and his family simply because you are a less than virile, neutered man. Grow a set, George, and for once in your pandering life, do what's right. Let the kid back in school. Have your stupid meetings monthly with the students and the teachers about violence and handling their emotions in an appropriate way. But PLEASE don't make an example of a six year old child because you are too stupid and scared to do the right thing. When we set the standard of what is and is not acceptible in our society off of the worst possible scenario, it is doomed to fail. You can NEVER imagine the worst, and you will end up hurting the innocent in your race to defeat the guilty. Have your secretary read that, and interpret it for you. She needs something to do other than roll her eyes at you behind your back. Have a good day, George.

http://www.nytimes.com/2009/10/12/education/12discipline.html?no_interstitial

Rated "E" for Everyone

2009-10-11T10:46:00.003-04:00

October 7 2:42 P.M.
Nervous flyers, beware: a Department of Homeland Security-funded project is investigating whether Wii Fit Balance Boards might be good ways to detect signs of tension or unease in airport security lines.

The next step in the War on Terrorism?
As somewhere over 20 million Wii Fit owners know, the Balance Board can detect your precise balance point, making it a perfect keep-fit tool -- but the Future Attribute Screening Technology project hopes detecting physiological signs -- including rapid shifts in balance -- will help identify passengers who may have hostile intentions.
"Researchers took a Wii balance board...and altered it to show how someone's weight shifts. Studies are now under way to determine whether there is a level of fidgeting that would suggest the need for secondary screening," CNN said.
The Balance Board is just one of a suite of sensors the Boston-based project is trialing; others include eye trackers and devices that record respiratory and heart rates. Researchers say their goal is to have a system ready for field tests in 2011.

This is one of those, "ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME???" moments. I get up in the morning, grab my cup of coffee, check my emails and the news page. Why do I continue to do this when almost daily, something like this pops off the screen and screams, "We are a country of morons and sheep!!!!". I know, it is so that I can gather material for this.....

Is there a focus group somewhere who actually thought this would be a good idea? Apparently there must be. It begs the question, who the hell are these people? I would like to meet them, although I have a sneaking suspicion that I already have. This group MUST consist of a group of people who are SO out of touch with reality that it boggles the mind of the average person. How would you like to be a fly on the wall in THAT brain storming session? I can just see it now. There they sit, a bunch of reality flunkies trying to justify their pathetic existance and hide the stunning reality that they are utterly and completely in the dark about anything that even remotely touches upon practical application and common sense. I know, that was a run-on sentence. The idea is so idiotic, that I don't feel the need to put much effort into the retort. Imagine what that room must have looked like. There, gathered around a bunch of folding office tables covered with a plethora of bagels and styrofoam cups, are the representatives of "the good idea" people. There is a big screen pulled down from the ceiling, and a WII game console on the table. At each of their seats is a WII Fit balance board. HOW THE FUCK did they make the connection from that piece of junk to "airport security"??? Maybe they were all distracted by the blue fireflies in the room. Those, of course are not fireflies, but the blinking blue tooth in each of their ears. Something tells me that they aren't the best multi-taskers.

Whose money are they sinking into THIS ridiculous possibility? Who the hell is THAT good of a salesman? I only ask that because I have applied common sense. People fidget. Some people don't like to fly! So, when you have them on your little "device that detects uneasiness", what the hell are they supposed to think? You people are staggeringly STUPID! Who the hell are you? I want just one chance to slap you upside your head, and tell you to STOP capitalizing on the brainwashed fear of the masses just to boost your own financial portfolio. Don't think, for one minute, that I actually believe that some focus group came up with this brain fart. I know who did. The scum-sucking opportunists who feel the need to perpetuate the fear that we are going to be attacked at any moment by the "evil Muslim terrorists". It already takes three hours to get on the fucking plane, and NOW you want to play video games with people, just to see if they are "excessively uneasy"? What the hell will you do, if they are? Hey morons, let me clue you in, you aren't making us safe. You are going to increase the cost of the flight to pay for your stupid shit, and then you are going to make us wait in line for an extra two hours because of it. How is THAT, in any possible way, going to boost your business?

I can't WAIT to see the first person in a wheelchair that has to get up and stand on the balance board. Oh, wait, you aren't going to make them do that? That's right, because terrorists would NEVER think to pose as handicapped to avoid your stupid little trap that you just advertised to the whole world. This idiocy serves ABSOLUTELY no purpose, what so ever. Yet, you idiots will find a way to profit from it. This is incredible. How do you slime balls sleep at night? I don't know who you are, or what your leverage is to pull this crap out of your asses and force it upon people who are too stupid to think for themselves, but I DO know this. If someone wants to blow up some shit with your airplane, they will. I know this because YOU think that the WII Fit balance board is an effective tool in preventing that. But you don't really, do you? You are scum. Your "study" is a fraud, and you deserve a WII Fit board firmly implanted where it just might throw YOUR balance off.

http://videogames.yahoo.com/events/plugged-in/fit-to-fly-balance-board-tapped-to-detect-shifty-characters-at-airports/1361483

You're An Idiot

2009-10-10T17:02:00.001-04:00

There are just certain things that make me shake my head, and say, "Wow, you are an idiot." Bumper stickers are stupid. Let me say that again. Bumper stickers are stupid. I am not so bored in traffic, nor am I so feeble minded that your idiotic sticker means anything to me other than to point directly to the fact that you are, indeed, an idiot. Now pay attention, people. This sticker, "God is my co-pilot", makes me want ro ram into the back of your car, causing severe injury and trauma. The reason is simple. You don't have a co-pilot. Nor are you flying an aircraft. It is a 1998 Oldsmobile. God wouldn't be caught dead in it. BUT, I am very open minded, so I am thinking that you can prove your contention by praying hard enough to stop my truck from demolishing your car and causing you permanent injury. Want to give it a try? I didn't think so. Take the stupid sticker off. Idiot.

This one is one of my favorites, "God is pro-life". Really? What is the infant mortality rate, again? Is your God taking a lunch and his substitute has limited powers? What is your rationale for the deaths of countless impoverished newborns brought into a life of suffering and pain? I only ask because the last time that I checked, LIFE means just that. It means not dead. People die, therefore God is NOT pro-life, but actually his business is booming, thanks to death. Huh, who would have thought. I KNOW, anyone who isn't a moron. Idiot. I will only make you suffer through one more, in that same line of thinking. This particular sticker says it all, folks. "God bless America and our troops". Are you serious? Do you even realize what that sticker says? First of all, why tack on "...and our troops" at the end? I thought your God was all knowing and all powerful. I am confused as to why you have to remind him that we have troops that may not actually be living in America right at this moment. Secondly, please stop blessing the country that prides itself on it's cultural and religious diversity with your feeble God that can't even keep track of where all the people are that he is to be blessing. By the way, what the hell is "blessing"? Whatever it is, he must be doing a piss poor job, because our troops keep dying. Sorry to state the obvious, and show you what a simpleton you are. Idiot.

If I see one more "My child is an honor's student at BLAH BLAH middle school", I am going to lose my mind. Listen, you moron. I don't care. As a matter of fact, YOUR kid is an honor's student because we have dumbed down our education system in this country so that your stupid little Connor and Kaitlin can make the freakin honor roll. Are you even aware of how far behind other countries we are in educating our youth? I bet that you aren't. The only thing that matters to you is making sure that your baby has a "feel good" moment when you put that stupid sticker on your car. Well, I have news for you. I hope that little Connor has taken a second language. He is going to need it when one of the many higher educated countries take our stupid asses over. Then maybe he can work at McDonalds. Put THAT on a sticker. "My son is manager of McDonalds". Be proud. Idiot.

Now, I understand that you are, and should be, ashamed that you voted for Senator McCain for president. However, you have NOT redeemed yourself by simply cutting HIS name off of the sticker on your car, and leaving PALIN behind. Read that sentence again. Do you see the ending? Here, I will point it out for you. "....leaving Palin behind". That is what the rest of the country has done. Try to keep up. Idiot.

Bush '04. For the love of everything unholy, would you PLEASE take that off. We know, he won. We know, you voted for him. Is this really a fact that you are proud of? Let me tell you what that sticker means to me. It means that you were an idiot then, and you are an even bigger idiot now. I know this because BUSH IS AN IDIOT! Put this sticker on your car, "My Pet Goat". Now there is a Bush accomplishment that we can all be proud of. Idiot.

You DO know that you are driving a car, right? I am just checking because, for the life of me, I cannot grasp how "Save our planet" belongs on a vehicle that pollutes our planet. How would you like me to save it? How about I take your keys from you, and you can peddle your stupid ass to where you are going! Don't preach to me about our planet by displaying such hypocrisy. You are making the people who actually practice what they preach look bad. I should cover your sticker with "God save our planet". Then you could fit in with the idiots on the other side of the fence. Moron.

Is there a website or a store that sells a "Conservative Idiot Kit"? I am asking because there has to be a rational explanation for why I see groups of the same stupid stickers vomitted all over beat up trucks. Now, focus you jerk. Could you PLEASE explain to me why you have the following stickers all over your truck? A black and white "POW" sticker, a "Bush '04" sticker, that stupid sticker that looks like an offical seal, but is actually just your membership to the NRA, "God, Guns, and Gold", a sticker featuring a little boy peeing on a Ford/Chevy emblem, a confederate flag, and a decal of some antlered animal that you plan to shoot. Does any of this really make any sense to you, or did you just get a good deal on your kit? How many proof of purchases from SKOAL did it cost you to get that stupid bunch of crap? Basically, all it says to me is, "I like to kill stuff, and I want the POWs returned unharmed." Think about that. It also says, "I am a racist bigot, and I would like to pee on your vehicle because it is different than mine." Now there is one more statement here, "I voted for Bush, and now our country is broke, and I have turned my assets (tractor and beer cans full of change) into gold." WTF???? Idiot is not a strong enough word for you. I will have to get back to you later when I think of a better one.

So, I think that I have made my point about bumper stickers, but there is just one last thing that begs to be said. WOULD YOU PLEASE, AT LEAST, PUT THEM ON STRAIGHT??? Holy hell, people. You bought the stupid thing because it was a message that you JUST HAD to display to every person unfortunate enough to be stuck behind you. Why, for the love of hell, can you NOT pay attention long enough to put it on the car straight? That adds an extra degree of stupidity to this process. People who put bumper stickers on their cars and trucks are idiots, but YOU are in a class even below them. If it isn't important enough to you to put it on the car straight, how about you just don't bother? Idiot.

Bottom of the food chain

2009-10-04T10:22:00.000-04:00

I have come to a harsh realization recently. I, apparently, am the bottom of the food chain in my house. This realization came by way of my fish. Yes, I said fish, as in, my pet Oscar fish. I can’t tell you his name, nor are my children allowed to say it. I will leave that up to your imagination. I would like to digress for a moment. How is a fish a pet? The word, pet, is originally a word suggesting action. Does anyone actually pet their fish? If you do, you seriously need to get out more.

Back to the topic at hand. This stupid fish hates me. I know what you are thinking. How can a fish “hate”. I don’t know. However, you don’t know that they can’t, so hush up and listen. My desk sits right next to his tank. It is an 85 gallon monstrosity with one angry Oscar inhabiting it. (There used to be four of them, but he ate the others.) This psychotic creature spends all day staring at me with his creepy googly eyes. If I dare to get up, and walk over to the tank, he opens his mouth as wide as he can, and charges the glass. This is why I call him a stupid fish. It is glass, idiot. What, exactly, do you think you are accomplishing with this behavior? Just once, I would like to scoop his nasty ass out of the safety of his water and drop him on the floor. The only problem with that is how pathetic it is for me to tower over a flopping fish taunting him about who is the tough one now. The real fun ensues when I attempt to feed him. He jumps out of the water, and has grabbed my finger on more than one occasion. Now, I know that this ornery thing does not have teeth, nor does he hurt me. However, I will scream like a little girl every time he does it. This is greatly amusing to my children. The reason is simple. He doesn’t behave this way with any other member of the family.

I have to ask my children to feed the fish, because I fear an animal that lives in a glass box full of water, and doesn’t have teeth. Even as I type that, I wonder what happened to put me at the bottom of the food chain here. I blame the kids. From the time that they were born, it has been me who has fed, clothed and kept them safe. They, however, have no problem with allowing me to dwell in the primordial ooze that is the rank and file in our home. Having said that, we also own two male Great Danes. (I know. I am insane. Just wait, it gets worse.) These dogs easily outweigh and overpower everyone in the home. I will give you three guesses who is viewed as the weakest link. That’s right, me. My children are all boys. I have three sons, ages 14, 12 and 10. (Pity me.) They are very playful and full of snark and spunk. Like all children, they love to taunt me. Their favorite time for this behavior is when I am busy working on my laptop. My middle son enjoys nothing more than coming up behind me and giving me a “wet willy”. For those of you who own civilized children, and don’t know what that is, I will explain. He licks his finger and sticks it in my ear. Charming behavior, that is for certain. When I react to his behavior, it is apparently, the cue for the other two children to join in the mayhem. They have a secret weapon. The dogs will not allow me to, in any way, do anything that they perceive as harm to my children. So, when I attempt to grab my son up, and give him a taste of his own medicine, the dog reminds me that it was a bad idea. My 185lb Great Dane will knock me down, and stand over me while my children taunt me from across the room. The dog is very gentle, but reminds me that he will tolerate any harm coming to his little humans.

Do I need to remind these stupid dogs that I gave birth to those rotten little vermin? I tried that. He didn’t care. The only thing I got for my efforts of communication was a big, wet tongue down the side of my face. I would prefer the “wet willy”, thank you very much. The other Dane will stand guard near my children, just in case I am creative enough to escape the other one’s clutches. Once I have lowered my voice, and the children say that it is ok, the dog will allow me to get up. This is not a good situation for me. Let me explain a bit about my dogs. They are beautiful, loving, gentle creatures. My children sleep on top of them, and they fiercely guard their little people. I love that about my dogs, but they must not have gotten the memo that I am the boss here. They are brilliant animals. They can open doors to let themselves out, and close them when they return. They can turn on the faucet to get a drink, and operate the ice maker on the refrigerator. We have to spell most of what we say, and then we have to begin to spell it backwards just so that the dogs don’t know what we are saying. It is safe to say, that they are more intelligent than the average human male. Oh, don’t get all in a snit over that, the truth hurts, I know. Here is my logic in regard to that issue. The dogs have trained the human males in my home to meet their every demand. I, however, am not so vulnerable. They keep me in check because they know that I am smarter than them. (Yeah, just go with it, people. It makes me feel better, so shut up.)

So now, I rank below the fish and the dogs. The children are next in line up the food chain. From the time that they were very little, I have been robbed of my ability to consume an entire meal. It is true, and every mother reading this knows what I mean. When they are infants, and I was breastfeeding them, they would decide it was time to eat EVERY time I sat down to feed myself. Then they became able to eat the same food that I did. Great, now they have the same freakin thing on their plate that I have on mine. Why is it that food always looks better to a child when it is on the adult’s plate? I swear, I could have put a pile of crap on a plate, and as long as it is in front of me, they would eat it. Come on, you have all done that. You take the toddler’s food, and put it on your plate, pretend to eat it, and the dumb kid falls for it the first 30 times. Again, the dogs learn faster than that. Now we enter the teenage and pre-teen years. Have you ever ordered a pizza, and then had to answer the phone? I have. The concept of “save some for mom” seems to elude them. I think they actually eat it faster, just so that I don’t get any. And who do they give their crust and scraps to? You guessed it, the stupid dogs. I give up.

I would like to introduce you to the top of the food chain in my house. His name is Brad. He has the role of step-father to my sons. He holds this title simply due to his gender, and ability to entertain them. The boys idolize him, and he can do no wrong. The favorite phrase heard in my house is, “Don’t tell mom.” He spends endless hours bonding with my sons, and conspiring against me. I had no idea that the ability to do a back flip on a trampoline could earn such undue admiration and respect. If only I had been a gymnast, I may have stood a shot at being held to that level of awesomeness. The dogs greet him at the door, after work, with wild excitement, and if he leaves they whine until he returns. The children tell him their deepest, darkest secrets and trust him with their hearts and lives. I can’t even get an honest answer to “who left the seat up?????” I bet it was Brad.

So, although I have the stretch marks and circles under my eyes, even though I have fed all of the creatures in my home, even though I have endured hours of mindless drivel and scooped countless piles of poop, despite the fact that I have anguished over the bills and found a way to pay them, even after countless visits to the school for endless nonsense, in spite of the fact that I have scheduled doctor and vet appointments and shuttled their ungrateful asses there, I am the lowest member of the food chain in my home.

I give up. That stupid fish is staring at me, the dogs have to pee, and my son needs a ride to a birthday party. I have to go now, the masters await. Where is Brad, do you ask? Oh, he is out playing disc golf with my boss. I am not kidding. You envy me, don’t you?

Willfully Ignorant

2009-10-04T08:44:00.000-04:00

If you want to give yourself a bleeding ulcer, discuss politics with your co-workers. I do my best to avoid such discussions. I actually find that the very word “discussion” is a misnomer, in this particular situation. We have all heard the saying, “never discuss politics or religion *insert situation here*”. Why, then do I constantly have to be barraged with ignorance in the workplace? A day does not go by where there is not a backhanded comment made about our president or the current state of our country. I will give you the most recent example. There were seven of us sitting around a table, and the most ignorant among us spoke first. He stated, “Hey, *other ignorant co-worker* did you see the cartoon hanging by the time clock this morning? It said One Big Ass Mistake America. HAHAHAHAHA”. Now, for those of you who are too intelligent to see the humor there, it is an acronym for Obama. Funny, huh?

Ignorant moron number one had to then explain why that was funny to ignorant moron number two. The reason is obvious. It is a visual attempt at wit and humor. Without the highlighting and capitalization of the first letter of each word, the other simpleton could not understand the concept. Following the blank stare from moron number two, ignorant fool number one said, “Get it? O B A M A, Obama. One Big Ass Mistake America, it spells Obama.” (I am still not sure what the comma that should precede the word “America” would symbolize there. Oh, no matter, they don’t even know that there SHOULD be a comma there. That would just complicate things for them.) At this point, the second fool got it. He laughed in the usual buffoon way, and replied, “There should be another one with Obama holding his hand out and saying “Can I borrow another three trillion dollars?” This was hysterical to the original Neanderthal.

At this point, I was already up, and out of my chair and headed for the door. Unfortunately, the filter that is between my brain and my mouth has a hole in it, and this slipped out, “Oh yes, you mean to pay for the war that YOUR president started?” Now, I have to explain the use of the term, ‘your president’. These ignorant fools have repeatedly stated that Barack Obama is NOT their president. I can only assume that George Bush was. I don’t know why they feel the need to disassociate with the man who is commander in chief. After all, it is the Republican party who has shoved down our throats for years that not supporting your president is “un-American”. I guess that only applies to those who oppose them. (I bet there is another reason, see if you can pick up on it as this progresses.)

The response from buffoon number two was one that I was not expecting. It was so over-simplified and incoherent that I was, again, stopped in my tracks. He stated with self assuredness, “Well, we were attacked first.” I was stunned, but managed to gather it together long enough to state the following, “Really? By Iraq? Gee, I must have missed that headline.” Now, let’s take a moment and really look at that exchange. The original contention was that Barack Obama is spending money that must be perceived as unnecessary, hence the overstatement of the amount of money. I reminded them that we have a war that was started by the prior president (their president) to pay for. The response was then given to justify the initiation of that war, therefore justifying the need to spend the money. Basically, he shot his own position in the ass. He did not, and still does not realize that.

Is your head hurting yet? Mine was. Now, here is where it turns ugly. The original buffoon’s response to my statement about Iraq was, “What difference does it make, they are all the same.” Oh holy hell. As the second moron is vigorously nodding his empty skull in agreement, I blurted out, in my best ignorant hick voice, “Y’all know it! One dead sand nigger is as good as another, ain't that right, y’all?” They both laughed and said, “Now, you’re getting it! That’s right!”

Here is the point when I had to simply leave the room, and take a deep breath. I wondered to myself, for hours how these people can be this hateful and willfully ignorant. You see, I knew from the beginning of this exchange that the issue with Barack Obama has little or nothing to do with the current state of our country, and everything to do with his race and party affiliation. This man has been in office for eight months, and they have already deemed him to be a mistake. I wonder how they have such vast powers of prognostication to make such a jump in rational thought. That is the problem. Rational thought does not exist in their reality. The only thing that matters to them is that their team lost. They actually want to see a failure of this administration, just so that they can claim righteousness. So, they do what the Republican shock jockeys have taught them. You simply make a willfully ignorant and untrue statement over and over again, and eventually it becomes truth and reality to those who want to believe it.

What a sad state of existence that must be. I voted and campaigned for Barack Obama. That is the very reason that I will be watching him, and his administration very closely. It is our duty and our right to question our leadership. It is also our duty to speak out when the people that we hired are not doing their job. I will not blindly follow a leader simply because I bought his eloquent campaign speeches. I want to see results, and if I do not, I will speak out. I am, however, realistic and realize that he cannot make big changes over night. He may not be able to make big changes at all. Barack Obama is merely a figurehead. He has very limited power, and has many voices that he must listen to and appease. He is not a dictator, people. He is one man of many who will make the decisions that will either improve or harm our nation.

It is an oversimplified thought process that brings people to see him as the singular problem with our leadership. It is that simplification that the trouble makers count on. They have used word association in regard to the man’s name, and his “questionable origin of birth” to stir the pot and to divide our nation. Yet, people blindly follow their indoctrination out of their own need to justify their blind hatred of a man based on his color. I am not one for pulling the “race card”, but you would have to be equally willfully ignorant to not see that in our country right now. The most shocking thing, for me, in regard to Obama’s rise to power is that they don’t realize how much they did to enable his ascension. The GOP slapped every American in the face with their choice of candidates, the structure of their campaign, and even the very slogan that represented their platform. I will not drone endlessly on about the failures of Senator Mccain and Governor Palin. We know what they are, and those who don’t, never will. This is a classic case of biting the hand that feeds you. When you appeal only to the base of your supporters, you better make sure that your base is the majority. It was not. You lost. Let it go. Barack Obama is our president now. You can hate him. You can sit around your pool table with your beer buddies and run his name into the ground while spouting racial slurs and blind ignorance. But, for the love of your god, would you PLEASE at least educate yourselves long enough to at least come up with a more intelligent way of communicating your ideas. The same old rhetoric is getting tired. The world is passing you by as you wallow in your backwards thinking and deep rooted hatred. Oh, by the way, I will give you an example of how intellect and education can benefit one who is trying to make a point with word association. Palin is the Greek word for “backward”. Now, I ask you, why would you follow someone who, not only has a backward thought process, but whose very name denotes the direction of your party? Read it again, think about it, use Google if you have to. I will be here and waiting on the edge of my seat for your well thought out retort.

People, you have at least three more years to come up with something a little more concrete than using the man’s name to prove that he is ruining our country. He is human. He will make mistakes. If you pull your head out of your ass long enough to think for yourselves, you may be shocked at the reality that becomes visible. You may be able to find fault with his actions, and the actions of his administration. You may be able to avoid broad prognostications of what a failure he is, and is going to continue to be. You may actually be able to analyze the facts for what they are, and not what you are told to believe. Through that process, you may be able to make improvements on his mistakes and restore honor and dignity to the party that you so loyally follow.

Or you can continue to drown yourself in Fox News and be brainwashed sheep. The choice is yours. Just don’t come crying to me about how MY president has ruined YOUR country. Your ignorance, and the ignorance of your party was just the boost that he needed. For that, I thank you. Your god knows, I wouldn’t want “Backwards”, and “Son of the first murderer” (according to your book of fantasy) to take my country into the future. Go ahead, look it up.

Usama or Osama?

2009-10-03T16:25:00.000-04:00

MURDER OF U.S. NATIONALS OUTSIDE THE UNITED STATES; CONSPIRACY TO MURDER U.S. NATIONALS OUTSIDE THE UNITED STATES; ATTACK ON A FEDERAL FACILITY RESULTING IN DEATH
USAMA BIN LADEN
Aliases:
Usama Bin Muhammad Bin Ladin, Shaykh Usama Bin Ladin, The Prince, The Emir, Abu Abdallah, Mujahid Shaykh, Hajj, The Director
DESCRIPTION
Date of Birth Used: 1957
Hair: Brown
Place of Birth: Saudi Arabia
Eyes: Brown
Height: 6'4" to 6'6"
Sex: Male
Weight: Approximately 160 pounds
Complexion: Olive
Build: Thin
Citizenship: Saudi Arabian
Language: Arabic (probably Pashtu)
Scars and Marks: None known
Remarks: Bin Laden is left-handed and walks with a cane.
CAUTION
Usama Bin Laden is wanted in connection with the August 7, 1998, bombings of the United States Embassies in Dar es Salaam, Tanzania, and Nairobi, Kenya. These attacks killed over 200 people. In addition, Bin Laden is a suspect in other terrorist attacks throughout the world.
REWARD
The Rewards For Justice Program, United States Department of State, is offering a reward of up to $25 million for information leading directly to the apprehension or conviction of Usama Bin Laden. An additional $2 million is being offered through a program developed and funded by the Airline Pilots Association and the Air Transport Association.
SHOULD BE CONSIDERED ARMED AND DANGEROUS
IF YOU HAVE ANY INFORMATION CONCERNING THIS PERSON, PLEASE CONTACT YOUR LOCAL FBI OFFICE OR THE NEAREST AMERICAN EMBASSY OR CONSULATE.

Welcome to number one on the FBI's most wanted terrorists list. Really? Are you sure he is number one? I have to wonder if the FBI made him number one, or the media made him number one. Only one problem, someone has his name spelled incorrectly. I only say that because if we can't have consistency in the spelling of his name, then how the hell do you expect to capture him? Then, what the shit are you going to do with him when you catch him? I have a few suggestions. First of all, find out how this man, and this man alone ran a group of individual cells of rebels who pride themselves on their elusiveness and trust no one. Think about that for a minute. Do we REALLY know who Al Queda is? Nope. It is a name given to a group of trouble makers who hate us. Actually they hate everyone. They consist of religioulsy brainwashed children and young men who hide behind their "god". How easy is it, do you think, to control such a group? My guess is that he has very little, if any control over them. He may be the voice that spurs the violence, but that is all I am willing to give him. He is a piss ant.

I do not fear him, or his like. They are weak men of weak constitution and character. They are willing to die over a lie, and a fantasy. Why do we fear that? The problem with fear, is that it breeds hatred. Yes, their religion is bizarre, but I have bad news for you. So is yours. How do they differ from the vile hatred and atrocities commited at the hands of Christians throughout history? They don't. The difference is their appearance and the media attention given to them. They appear very ominous behind those dark eyes and facial hair. They wear strange clothes and head dressings, and their view of the world is one that we do not understand. Funny, that description matches many of our own "trouble makers" throughout time. The first is Jim Jones, known as the leader of the cult formed as "Jonestown". The second is Ted Kaczynski, otherwise known as the unabomber. How about Charles Manson? You see, we too are capable of breeding sadistic killers who are set on destroying what they do not feel meets their standards. We call them serial killers. We call everyone who matches Usama's description a terrorist. Word play, people, that is all it is. Those individuals are no different from each other. Throughout history, there have been hundreds of Bin Ladens. Why do we fear him so much? You are fools. You fear him because he wants you to. He is the Muslim monster who hides in your closet and beneath your bed. Now, who is brainwashed? You are.

Now, back to that ridiculous "wanted poster". First, let's take a look at the description of this "notorious killer", who, by the way, we actually had in custody years ago. We aren't sure exactly how tall he is, or what language he speaks. We don't know where he is but we know that he is left handed and has a limp. He has no known scars? Wow, and yet we know his approximate weight? Are they kidding? My favorite part though, has to be the reward. There is total of 27 million dollars on this man's head. Do you know how many virgins you can buy with that kind of cash? I bet his henchmen do. This whole concept of posting a direct line of access for the general public makes me chuckle. Can you just imagine the "reports" and "information" gathered by the poor guy that has to sort through this crap? I can see it now...

"YAH! I'd 'preciate it if y'all could send some of them men in black down here, cuz I'm purdy sure the guy next door is a terrorist. I wuz out skinnin my deer on Sunday, and I sawr him fixin' on blowin' up my shed! He got him one of them thar towels on his head, and wuz lookin kinda shifty in the eyes. Y'all still got that billion dollar reward for infirmation leadin to his arrest? Will that mess up my disablity payments? Do I have to pay taxes on at?"

Good lawd, people, use some common sense here. Do you really think that there is any purpose to this list other than fear mongering?

Go to the site. Look at it. They title it in bright red lettering....TERRORISTS. They have a separate list for them, AS IF any of you can even pronounce their names, let alone identify them in public. Yeah, they are notorious all over the world. There are thousands of trained operatives looking for them, and YOU think that this is somehow HELPFUL in their capture? We are such a mis-guided flock of bleating sheep.

Is Usama dead or alive? I don't know. I do know this, if the man is alive, there is a reason. You should really put some thought into what those reasons are. I am pretty sure it is not because he found a good cave to hide in. So, who should you REALLY fear, and be keeping an eye on? I would say, the ones who made that poster.

http://www.fbi.gov/wanted/terrorists/terbinladen.htm

2009-10-03T11:38:00.000-04:00

THE "EX"

I am an ex-wife. After my divorce, I began to pay attention to the inner workings of other separated couples. It was fascinating. Every one of us seemed to take on the role of a character fit for daytime drama. I am beginning to see why the divorce rate is so high. It is simply a chronic “mis-match” situation. So, I compiled a list of the characters that I have witnessed over the years and would like to play a little game. I wonder if we could just match up the personalities AFTER the divorce and have a better shot at people staying together. There is a certain degree of revelation that happens in the divorce process. In other words, the real you is revealed. That is where the compatibility is found, in the real personalities of people. When we are dating, and courting for marriage, everyone hides a certain amount of who they really are. I feel that everyone should have to go through the divorce process before they are married. After all, would YOU marry any of the following?

The Ex-husband

The Wimp
He loves to play golf, and wear one of his collection of conservative polo shirts. He treasures his comfortable loafers and occasionally shows off his sandals with black socks. This is like being married to your sister, the neat freak. He is about as masculine as Richard Simmons. He hires someone to mow the lawn, and orders you to have the carpets cleaned once a month. His underwear are neatly folded and assorted by color and date of purchase. His toothbrush is kept in a separate holder because he doesn’t want it to bump against yours. You are beginning to wonder how you ever conceived the children. His manicure is immaculate, and his every hair is trimmed with precision. (ALL of his hair) After 10 years of marriage, you think it is time to take the next step, and try having sex somewhere other than the bed, on your back. No such luck.

The Egomaniac
This one is the serial cheater, philanderer and bar hopping, self absorbed strip club frequenter with a closet full of “weekend clothes”. He has more hair care products than you do. The numbers on his platinum credit card are all but worn off. He comes home reeking of multiple perfumes. The women flock to him, wherever he goes. He repeatedly reminds you that you should be flattered by this behavior, after all, you are the one he comes home to. He has a standing appointment at the dentist’s office for routine whitenings of his teeth. He spends hours practicing his wink, smile combination in front of the mirror. The very sight of his self assured swagger makes you nauseated. Not to mention the stench of his cologne. You watch him walk out the door and wonder if you should confirm for him, that his behavior is nothing but an over-compensation for a “short coming”. Oh well, tonight’s woman will find out soon enough. Time to pack.

The Traveling Salesman
This winner has lots and lots of friends from all social circles. Unfortunately, he has those friends because he still a drug habit from college. The good news is, he hides it well with a steady paycheck. Well, steady that is, until he develops that nasty little habit of going to the track with his buddy from the old neighborhood. He has tons of nick names, and is always the life of the party. Everyone thinks you are so lucky to have him. After all, he was the Prom king and voted “most likely to succeed”. If only he had.

The Workaholic
This prince charming works long hours, answers your questions with a distracted nod, and spends all of his spare time calculating his next big move at the office. He has multiple levels of secretaries because one woman can’t possibly meet his demands. Who needs that many women? What do you do all day??? You need a secretary just to remember your secretaries’ birthdays. Wow, and you thought this guy would make you the most important thing in his life. He collects things. He blindly follows the “whatever man dies with the most toys, wins” mantra. Whether or not he is able to “get it up” is determined by his performance at the meeting today. His supply of little blue pills is almost as vast as his collection of antique desk blotters.

The “I Married You Because I Knocked You Up"
Many like to play this role, but few actually can fill it. This is the guy that marries the most miserable, raunchy woman ever known to man, and refuses to admit that he married her for her ability to suck a golf ball through a garden hose. It may also be the fact that he can’t hold down a job, and her stripping tips is all that is paying for their “pay as you go” cell phone. This is, of course, while supplementing the check that he gets thanks to that little stumble at Wal Mart. Whew good thing you knocked her up, or you would be broke. That kid is your ticket to food stamps. He, instead, claims that he just had to do the right thing by her and the baby.

The “Have Your Cake and Eat It Too”.
This one stops by once a week to have sex with the ex wife. (Tuesday nights are reserved for her best friend). This one makes me wonder if “spousal support” actually makes the government her pimp…just a thought.

The Eternal Child
You married this one because he is cute and endearing, full of fun and youth. Yeah, at 24, but not so much at 50. A beer belly, exposed butt crack, comb over, sweaty pit stains, party socks, a half a can of beer, and a trampoline are not a pretty site. This is also referred to as the “epiphany divorce”. This is where the soon to be ex wife sees the look on the neighbor’s faces, and says, “What the hell was I thinking?? His mother was right.”

The Mama’s Boy
His mother calls to tell him that the girl he should have married just got engaged, and that there is still time. She stops over to help with his laundry, showing you how he likes his shirts folded. He is always quick with the “almost as good as my mom made it” comment, after you spent 6 hours in the kitchen. She (the shrew-in-law) drops by unannounced, and gets in the house with the key that he gave her. That key, by the way, was your key. It isn’t lost. He gave it to her. He buys you and his mother the same gift, only hers was for mother’s day, making a mixer an appropriate gift for her, but NOT for you for your anniversary. She needs him to take her to the doctor because she just can’t see to drive, and he believes her, never mind her late night trips to Bingo. You are reminded continually of how you “ruined his life” and “he should have listened to his mother”. You agree.

The Psycho
Unfortunately, you don’t know that you are married to one of these, until the divorce. He could be, originally any of the above. It takes nothing short of heavy equipment and police action to get him out of the house. That is where the fun begins. He suddenly never wanted to marry you in the first place, and wishes you dead. An hour later, you get a teary phone call telling you that he still loves you and wants a second, or third, or fourth chance. But, who’s counting? The next morning, you find your tires are flat. You wonder what made him think that you wouldn’t know it was him. He sends hundreds of emails and text messages, each one contradicting the last. He threatens suicide or killing your new boyfriend, depending on how he feels at the time. There is always one minor detail that he seems to forget. The kids. He only seems to remember them when he is standing before the nice lady with a gavel and a black robe. Whoops.

The Ex Wife

The Doormat
This one allows the husband to come and go as he pleases, for the kids sake. But really, it is for her sake. After all, how can she actually push for a divorce when she depends on his paycheck and medical benefits? Her own self worth does not ever occur to her. The kids, of course, just wish they would have it one way or another, either divorce or stay together. However, mommy knows best, and she thinks that hanging in limbo forever is healthy. After all, she can’t call all of her friends and tell them what ignorant thing he did yesterday, if she actually has the cojones to kick him out…for good.

The “Jerry Springer Sweeps Week”
This one is a real treat. She has slept with your brother, best friend and niece…and yet….she feels the need to blame YOU for the divorce. If you just would have ignored the fact that your son has blue eyes and curly hair, and you both have brown hair and brown eyes, things would have been fine. After all, you THOUGHT he was your son…he called you “dad”. So, what difference does it make? Never mind that tragic chain link fence incident that rendered you sterile when you were 12. She must have forgotten about that. She takes you to court for child support and a DNA test reveals that you are not the biological father. No kidding. Now, this woman convinces the judge that you are the only father that the child has ever known, and you agree that you loved the child like he was your own….nice going….you are now paying for the child that actually belongs to your cousin’s ex-boyfriend. She laughs all the way to the nail salon.

The Trailer Park Queen
She has a bright future in the major leagues. This woman can throw your stuff further than a professional outfielder. She stands in the doorway of your mobile home, screen door propped open with her hip, throwing your treasured possessions as far as the eye can see. You duck and dodge your NASCAR anniversary beer cans, your collections of sports jerseys with the arms cut off, your beer tap handle shaped like Pamela Lee whizzes past your head. You could have been killed by that one. She tells you that she never loved you and that you are inadequate in bed (or the back seat of your pickup, whatever.). She smashes your series of Super Bowl commemorative mugs off of the trailer next to you. You stand there just hoping that she doesn’t find your knife collection that you have hidden under the mattress. You never even make it to court, thanks to multiple restraining orders, and the fact that she was already married when you married her. WHEW, dodged a bullet there!

Ms. High Maintenance
This one is going to cost you. She cared more about the bulge in the back of your pants than the front when she married you. Your first clue would have been when she wanted a larger engagement ring. Your marriage has consisted of tummy tucks, face peels, breast implants and electrolysis treatments. You pay for all of this. Why? Well, because it is YOUR fault, silly. Those children that you had to have, ruined her youthful looks. She has selflessly done all of these things for you and the kids, the least you can do is pay for the repairs. Do you know what it would cost you to have to pay someone for all of the things she has done? You would need a nanny, a housekeeper, a prostitute, a secretary and a chef. Hold on a minute. You just did the math. That would have been cheaper. You total up the wardrobe that consists of material stripped from the bodies of dead animals, the endless collection of pointless knick knacks, the custom designed draperies and bed coverings, the bulky furniture, the “investment art” that adorns your walls, and you remember something. You never wanted any of it. You also have an aversion to floral print. That didn’t stop her, though. Everyone who is anyone (according to her designer) had that pattern. Your stomach flops as you realize that you should have kept your mouth shut, and never let her find that condom wrapper in your Jaguar. You must now, “keep her in the lifestyle which she has become accustomed”. Uh oh. Then there are the kids. By the time this divorce is over, you will be the only top CFO with a part time job, and living in your mother’s basement.

The Spy
Oh boy, this one is a challenge. Your whole relationship, she was the social butterfly. She was always polite, fun and endearing. Her hair was always perfectly in place, and flawless make-up. It was her uniform for becoming the leader of her troops. She has acquired a small army of estrogen to keep tabs on you wherever you go. The true masters of this role have been skilled enough to recruit your own family. Your own mother keeps her updated on who you are dating. Your own sister gives her the juicy details of who the girl is. Your cousin becomes friends with your new girlfriend, just to get her cell phone number for your ex. This is where it gets ugly. You can’t go to the restroom in public without her knowing which hand you wiped with. She has moved on with her life, while you are suffering one break up after another. It is her life mission to make sure that you are never happy. This is all because you fell asleep once while she was crying. Idiot.

The Victim
This piece of work is the slimiest of all the “ex” roles. She hides behind her children, and manages to convince everyone that she was the victim of everything that ever went wrong in your relationship. She is the martyr, and the dutiful wife and mother. She can cry on command, and be off to the bar as soon as your mother agrees to watch the kids. She is watching them, of course, because your ex just needs a little time to herself. Time to herself being time with random men, of course. Sometimes, being right, and people knowing the truth is over rated. Trust me, just be thankful that she isn’t in your bed anymore.

The Serial MOM
You married her because you knew she would be good mother. You just didn’t know how good. If you come home from work, and hear one more word about “the kids”, you are going to choke her. You begin to wonder if this woman serves any other purpose on this earth than to procreate, control and shop. She has a closet full of “holiday sweaters”, and matching hair ribbons. She proudly displays the “my child is an honors student” bumper sticker on her light blue minivan. Her calendar is color-coded by child, activity and carpool. She has long since cut off the beautiful hair that made your heart swoon, and has replaced it with the “mom cut”. You know it, just above shoulder length, bangs gently curled under, and conservatively placed highlights. Her wardrobe now consists of the underwear that you found in your grandmother’s house when you were 6, comfortable slip-on shoes, and countless jogging suits. Her entire life revolves around the school activity schedule and shuttling the children from practice to music lessons. Your sex life died the minute your fourth child was born. Finally, you overcome the guilt placed there by her because she does so much and you do so little, and move out. As it turns out, she has found happiness with your daughter’s math teacher. Good for her.

So, I know what you are thinking. You know of at least two people that match those descriptions. So do I. I have considered pairing them up together, if for no other reason, than to watch the fireworks fly. Divorce, marriage, separation, dating and child rearing have become part of our entertainment industry. We have dozens of “reality” TV shows dedicated to this very social behavior. You can tune in to watch people argue over their divorce, point fingers at who was the worse parent, and fight over their insignificant material possessions. You can then change the channel and watch another couple fall in love and marry. It begs the question, how long before they are on the other channel? We invade people’s lives as an escape from our own. That is a sad reality. Put THAT on a TV show.

This is all done with a purpose. Go back and read it again. Which one are you?

Game over.

Do you feel lucky?

2009-09-26T10:25:00.001-04:00

*SUICIDE IS A KNOWN RISK OF DEPRESSION, AND SOME OTHER PSYCHIATRIC DISORDERS
*ANTIDEPRESSANTS MAY INCREASE SUICIDAL THOUGHTS OR BEHAVIORS IN SOME CHILDREN, ADLOESCENTS, AND YOUNG ADULTS ESPECIALLY WITHIN THE FIRST FEW MONTHS OF TREATMENT OR WHEN CHANGING THE DOSE. NO INCREASED RISK HAS BEEN SHOWN FOR ADULTS OVER AGE 24, AND THE RISKS DECREASED FOR THOSE OVER 65.
*ALL PATIENTS STARTING THERAPY SHOULD BE MONITORED APPROPRIATELY AND OBSERVED CLOSELY FOR WORSENING DEPRESSION SYMPTOMS, SUICIDAL THOUGHTS OR BEHAVIOR, OR UNUSUAL CHANGES IN BEHAVIOR.
*(DRUG NAME) IS NOT APPROVED FOR CHILDREN UNDER AGE 18.

I stumbled upon this little treasure while checking my homepage news. It came up in the form of an advertisement. I have ranted on, all too often, about the scam that is the pharmaceutical industry, and here again, is another shining example of the staggering ignorance of the American consumer.

I want you to read that entire insert warning, and by the way, it is NOT the entire warning label, you can open a link on the ad to find the rest. I didn’t feel the need to read any more, it is pretty clear with the information already provided. Did you read it? Did you find any possible contradictions, or red flags that MAYBE, just maybe, this isn’t the best idea?

So, here is what I am thinking. This is an advertisement. It’s purpose is to entice you to visit your physician, and request the drug. Now, let’s say that you missed the whole list of dangers, and you missed the warnings of heightened suicidal thoughts, then you skimmed over the caution to not take this drug if PRETTY MUCH anything else is wrong with you. By the way, you can’t even take aspirin while taking this drug. Now, you walk into your doctor’s office, and tell him that you are “depressed”. He says, “What seems to be the problem?” You drone on endlessly about the horrid conditions of your life. These conditions are, of course, the same things that everyone else deals with, but you just want that magic pill to make it all better. Then you tell him that you are having trouble sleeping, and you are entertaining thoughts of suicide. Now, at this point, he is running behind on his next appointment. We have all had this happen, he looks at his watch and closes your file. It’s prescription time! He half heartedly suggests that you seek another professional’s assistance, and gives you the name of his fraternity brother who just happens to be a psychiatrist.

He doesn’t stop there. He also gives you a prescription for your new “happy pill”. He has read your file, and he sees that you are not taking any medications that should interfere with the prescription that he just gave you, at least you hope that he has. You toddle off to the pharmacy with a new found spring in your step. Finally, you are going to be able to lift that weight off of your shoulders and feel good again. You hand your treasured little piece of white paper, that holds the key to your new life, over to the pharmacy technician. That’s right, I said “technician”, not pharmacist. She tells you that it will be a 20 minute wait. So, you wait. When they finally call your name, it is like angels singing. You walk up, and she asks you if you have any questions for the pharmacist. You think to yourself, “Why would I need that? My doctor gave it to me, it should be fine!” So, you say, “no”.

Here is where you need to stop, and think. Read the damn insert, people! Does it, in any way, suggest that this pill is going to fix the misery that is your life??? NO! This is a drug for someone who has been extensively tested, and found to be someone whose brain is misfiring, and needs a tune-up! This is NOT for someone who just has a crappy life because of stupid decisions and family members that suck the life out of you! So, why the hell are they advertising it to YOU? Good question. I would also like to know that answer. I think that you are smart enough to figure out WHY a big business would target the general consumer with something that clearly states that it is, not only dangerous, but can HEIGHTEN the very feelings that you are trying to repress. MONEY! Do you really think that big pharm. Cares about whether or not you want to eat the end of a rifle? Nope, they care about their bottom line. The more people that they can gather up to go into their doctor’s office and request it, the better for them. They KNOW the risks. They KNOW approximately how many people they can kill. They KNOW that it will lie squarely on the doctor’s shoulders, up to a certain amount of injury or death. They KNOW what the risks are to their consumers AND their bottom line. They take that risk, and shovel it down our throats. YES, they have risk assessment professionals that will tell them how many people can die! They weigh the profits against the losses through lawsuits, and when the profits outweigh the losses, they market it. The risks are low enough, that the FDA pushes it through, and the next thing you know, YOU are the one playing Russian roulette.

Now, back to the warning label. This lovely little piece of paper that you don’t read, and throw in the trash is their insurance policy. It is their “disclaimer”. It is their protection, NOT YOURS! Now use some damn common sense, please. If you are taking a pill because you have feelings of killing yourself, and the warning label tells you that it can increase those feelings, I have to ask you, do you feel lucky today?

http://www.cymbalta.com/depression.jsp

2009-09-19T16:19:00.000-04:00

TRY THE TRUTH

Why don’t people ever just say what they mean? We teach our children not to lie, but what we are actually saying is, “just lie when it is a NICE lie.” If we are going to be honest, then just do it already.

I was in an elevator the other day, and a pompous ass backed up like he didn’t see me when he got on the freakin thing in the first place, and stepped on my foot. He didn’t even bother to turn around when he mumbled a half hearted, disingenuous “uh, sorry”. Now sir, if you are reading this, I would have been perfectly fine if you had just said what you thought, which was, “how dare you insignificant cretin be standing in the way of where I need to stand, after all, I am me, Dr. Whatever, and I have more value than you.” You see? Then I could have responded with, “Your cologne is gagging me, please move forward.”

Frankly, this whole thing is an enigma to me. How many times have we all done the same things? You are in the grocery store, or at the bank, or porn store, whatever, and you see someone that you haven’t seen for years. I bet there is a reason why you haven’t seen them. Nine times out of ten, it is due to the fact that you no longer had the desire to do so. So why in the hell do we say “oh, hello, it is so good to see you again!” (insert forced excitement at the word “so”) Listen, neither one of you want to say it. You both want to just pretend like you didn’t see the other person. So, if you are just compelled to say something due to the awkward nature of the situation, tell the truth. Try this, “Oh shit. I thought that I would never see you again, and frankly, I was unprepared for seeing you now. I am not going to hug you with the phoney pat on the back. I am just going to walk away and spare us both the phone call to our friends later just to say, ‘ugh, guess who I ran into today.’” Now, doesn’t that sound better? Then you can still call your friends and describe the look on the other person’s face. Trust me, that is a much more entertaining call to make.

If you get your hair cut and change the color, and your friend says, “Oh, you cut your hair? I love the color, it compliments your skin tones.” Well, that means to look like shit. When they notice your haircut and state it in the form of a question, that is their way of avoiding the statement that they actually want to make, and that is, “What the hell were you thinking, as if you didn’t look old enough with that wispy, mousy, out dated hair-do that you had before, now you look like my grandmother did when they laid her out for her viewing.” Then when they compliment your “skin tone”, trust me, they wouldn’t know a complimentary skin tone if their lives depended on it. I know this because of the multitude of women running around with the wrong color foundation on their faces. It is just something that they say because they heard someone else say it, and you really can’t question it because YOU don’t know what the hell a complimentary skin tone is. Try this, “How much did you pay for THAT? You should get your money back, and I really hope that you didn’t tip the stylist. Please don’t ever do that again, on occasion I have to be seen in public with you, and then I look like an ass for not telling my friend that they look awful.” She may cry. But really, you are saving her the embarrassment of hearing it from her mother-in-law.

Now that is a truthful creature right there, the mother-in-law. I have come to the conclusion that is the reason that so many people love to hate their in-laws. There is a profound truth that is carried within the separation of an in-law. By separation, I mean that they can re-direct their short-comings, as a parent by pointing out the failures of yours. The sad thing is that most of the time, they are right. So, the next time your mother-in-law asks you why you don’t visit more, instead of telling her that you are too busy, or the kids are sick, try this, “If you would ever just enjoy our company, and the company of your grandchildren WITHOUT your constant reminders that you did a better job with your kids than I am doing with mine, maybe we would visit more. Oh, and by the way, I talked to grandma *insert her in-laws last name here* and she says the same about you.” It may cause some strain at the next holiday function, but hey, the other in laws will secretly love you more, I promise.

So you are thinking that I am just trying to stir up some shit, huh? Nope. I am telling you that we have convinced ourselves, as a society that to be “polite” is ALWAYS the best policy. It isn’t. It promotes bad behavior. You perpetuate it every time you tell one of those “harmless little lies”. This all feeds into my “some people just suck” theory. If they can’t hear the truth, and feel that they maybe should modify their behavior accordingly, well then, they are just people who suck. We need to know who they are! Since tattooing them with “I SUCK” isn’t a viable option, then we just have to sort it out for ourselves on an individual level. The only way to do that is with the truth. The truth reveals so much about a person, whether it be good or bad. I firmly believe that relationships, friendships and family would be a more appropriately matched if it is based on the truth. Try it.

The next time a lady rams into you with her cart in the grocery store, even though she clearly saw you there, and says “excuse me.”, then just say, “no, you ignorant, self absorbed jerk! I bet you park in the fire lane, and handicapped spots because you just have to ‘run in for a minute’, don’t you??? I will NOT excuse you, because you saw me, and ran into me anyway. Go around me, and watch out for someone else who doesn’t care that you are in their way.” At least she will shut up for a minute, and the rest of the day, she will think twice about parking in the handicapped spot.

2009-09-19T14:16:00.000-04:00

Suburban Hell

I find myself in a world unfit for those possessing even the most remote amount of sanity. I live in suburban hell. Now, I am an atheist, so really hell doesn’t even exist for me. Yet, I can’t help but ponder the idea that hell is very real, and that just possibly, I live in it. This has become quite a dilemma for me. So, I decided to do some research. I bypassed all of the things that promote rational thought, and went straight to the bible. This book poses quite a little problem, all in itself. But, I digress.

I skimmed past the story about the naked couple that ate ribs and fruit. Then there was some nonsense about a guy and a big dingy with pairs of animals crammed into it. Then I scrolled through the mundane tales of everything that is pure common sense, you know, like the lesson about not killing your brother, or fornicating with a goat. All very useful information, however, as it turns out, I was in the wrong damn book. That was a complete waste of twenty minutes of my life, that I will never get back. As it turns out, they wrote another book. That would have been useful information as a footnote in the first one.

Now, I have finally found what I am looking for. I scroll through the pages with the same open minded objectivity given by those who believe in it. This is what I found. Apparently, there was an angel that ticked God off. So, being the all forgiving God that he is, he kicked his ass out of Heaven. I suppose the angel got upset about it, and took it upon himself to singlehandedly take down anyone who dared to not take his side in the argument. It all seemed very petty, to me. But, who am I to judge, that job has already been taken and I am pretty sure that I don’t want to end up like that angel guy. So now, we have a choice, God, or the pissed off angel. I choose none of the above, the way that I look at it, I am screwed either way. Hell, apparently is full of fire and brimstone. Heaven is full of happiness and clouds. I am afraid of heights, and fire hurts. I have decided to keep my options open, just in case another option arises.

I have to say that the information that I found very much suited my theory. I would like you to indulge me for just another four, or five hundred paragraphs. Hell is described in the following way, as you already know, the head of this place is a vindictive, spiteful creature who got very upset because of a lost argument. This creature, the Devil, has many mignions who do his bidding. Basically, they are just very rude and don’t understand personal boundaries. I know this because of the whole “possession thing”. I also found that he is a very efficient multi-tasker. Did you know that the Devil can command his minions, fight with God, travel at the speed of light, create war, death, destruction, poverty, lust, create wealth, destroy wealth, keep the fires burning in hell, and still have time to have sex, and create a child. That is impressive. Here is another side note, once you visit the Devil, you can’t leave. Ever.

Let us get back to suburbia for just a moment. I will describe it for you, in great detail, and see if you can make the connection. A suburb is made up of people who want “more” than the city can offer. Within suburbs, you will find even smaller gatherings of mignions, they exist in what is referred to as “housing developments”. Once you enter a housing development, you can never leave. I mean that literally. Have you ever tried to find your way out of a housing plan that has all of the streets named after trees? I have, it isn’t pretty. So, while you are lost in the development, you decide that since you can’t leave, you might as well move in. Welcome to suburban hell. There is always a head of the development. I will refer to her as the Devil. She is otherwise known as the president of the civic association. Now, this devil commands her mignions with blinding efficiency. Housewives dutifully invading everyone’s privacy. Their methods are really quite slick. It all begins with the lowranking minion bringing you a casserole. I will refer to that as the ribs, and apples. Soon following that, you will have their children knocking at your door selling everything from cookies to magazines. Like a fool, you buy them, thus depleting your wealth. Now it is time for the neighborhood fundraiser, so upon the visit of another loyal follower, you agree to volunteer, thus creating wealth. At this point, you are trapped. They have fooled you into accepting their ways, and the next thing you know, you are hosting a candle party. After all, we must keep the fires of hell burning. I am going to stop and ask you a question. Did you know that suburban housewives have sex toy parties? Neither did I, until now. It all sounds a bit, I don’t know, lustful, maybe?

So, I decide to attend this gathering, purely for the research aspect of my theory, and wouldn’t you know, there was more evidence to be found. The party is never held within walking distance of your home. You always have to get in your car, and drive there because they choose the house furthest from convenience. On my way there, I was almost sideswiped by the devil in her rush to get her child home from cheerleading practice. Have you ever seen how fast suburbanites drive? Literally, at the speed of light. I find it curious that the devil is absent from our little suarre. I was informed that she was unable to attend due to a death in the family. I always knew that she wasn’t fond of her mother-in-law. It turns out that the poor old woman mysteriously had her pills mixed up, and her son and daughter-in-law inherited a fortune when she died. Oh well, some folks have all the luck.

Returning to the party now, I learned that someone had made a mistake with the invitation list. I found this puzzling, because my invitation was signed by the devil herself. But I am sure that it was purely an oversight that the woman who was sleeping with her neighbor’s husband was invited to the party hosted by the wife of the man she was sleeping with. Well, as you can imagine, a war was begun. The entire party was ruined and I never had the opportunity to purchase the penis shaped ice cube tray. I was very disappointed. I went home that night, and I had an epiphany. It dawned on me that ever since the devil’s divorce, she seemed a bit vindictive, and angry. The connection became clear. I sat straight up, grasped my heart in despair, and realized that I was trapped in suburban hell.

There is a moral to this story folks, now pay close attention. When you feel the temptation to enter the land of perfectly manicured lawns, when you see the quaint little homes all in a row, when you see the children gleefully playing in the well nestled cul de sac, there is something that I would like you to remember. It may appear to be beautiful. It may appear to have all of the charms of peace and happiness. I have seen the depiction of an angel. I imagine that you have seen the same. Remember, things are not always as they appear, after all, it was one pissed off angel that started this mess in the first place. If you do not heed my warning, do not look for support from me when you are trapped in suburban Hell.

2009-09-19T10:39:00.000-04:00

Revenge Is A Dish Best Served Cold

Revenge is a dish best served cold. What an incredible powerful statement. What does it really mean? What is revenge? Does that word really carry the negative connotation that it has become accepted as? When one seeks revenge, do we not see it within the context of the action? Here is a story that begs to be shared, is it revenge?
Dear “Dad”,
I am writing this letter now because it is the thirteenth anniversary of my father’s death. Every year at this time, I am overwhelmed by sadness, regret and anger. This moment is long overdue. David James was my father. He died November 16, 1993 of suicide. He ran the exhaust into his old Chevy hatchback while he sat quietly parked in his own back yard. He died peacefully of carbon monoxide poisoning. He was survived by two daughters. Their names are Robin, and Melissa. He also fathered two sons, and their names are David and John. Melissa was only 15 years old at the time of his death, and John was just a baby, at 4 years old. The day that I buried my father, it was cold and raining. I remember watching John place his toy trucks at the head of his grave with tears streaming down his innocent face.

I had so many questions that I wanted to ask him. I will never have that opportunity. He never got the chance to see his grandsons, and they will never know their real grandfather. The things that I remember about him are his smile, his laugh and his incredible sense of humor. He had a gift of making people laugh, even when they didn’t want to. He never made excuses for his life, or his mistakes. My father’s life was long even though he only lived to see his 40th birthday. His choices landed him in prison several times, and he was at times completely consumed by drugs, alcohol, and women. He was adopted at a very young age by a couple who tried to love him despite his explosive temper that developed as a teenager. They did not have the skills or community support to guide their son through life. I have heard many stories of my father’s life and wondered how much the loss of two of his children had an impact on his choices.
I saw my father the night before he died. This moment is one that would change my life forever. I went to visit him in his barely inhabitable home in the heart of Garfield. I saw immediately that he had been drinking, which is a violation of his probation. He looked so sad and utterly exhausted. He asked me to come and sit on his lap. I snarled at him, and told him that he was going to go back to prison. I just couldn’t understand why he wouldn’t change, even for me. He insisted again that I came and sit on his lap. I rolled my eyes, and walked over to him, and sat with him. He looked at me through his thick, tinted, broken glasses and said, “Baby girl, don’t do with your life what I have done with mine. I love you.” I regret this next moment with all of my heart. I told him that I would never end up a drunk like him, and told him to sober up before he called me again. He was dead the next day.

Now, at thirty three years old, I finally understand. He knew that the choices that he made in his life had made him what he was. He was warning me about the dangers of poor choices and telling me that sometimes, we just run out of tomorrows. I learned the most valuable lessons in life from a man that society would have deemed a waste. He was my father, and his memory deserves respect. His life and death taught me more than any sheltered suburban family ever could.

Imagine how much we may have been able to learn from each other is it wasn’t stolen from us. I am HIS daughter, in my heart, mind and soul. You said once, when I was young, that I was like a wild horse, and that they are the most loyal when broken. How did that work out for you? My father didn’t have to break me in order to earn my loyalty, he just had to love me. He accomplished in a fraction of the time what you had a lifetime to teach. My father’s legacy ends with broken homes, three wives, and a criminal history, but it was real.

I have seen your legacy. You have passed closet alcoholism, disrespect of your wife, close minded bigotry, intolerance, and arrogance. The amazing thing, is that you were able to pass them along without ever having been home. I can only imagine what the people at the bar, bowling alley, flight club, and golf course were able to learn from you. Maybe I am giving credit to the wrong person. Maybe the credit for your accomplishments should go to your other half. After all, I credit her for so many things in my life. Allow me to give you a few examples. I credit her for my fear of being loved, the constant questioning of my abilities, my poor self image, and most of all, the emptiness in my soul where a mother’s love should be. This brings me to another introduction.

Veronica Lynn is my mother. I am sure that you remember her. She was that child that you put on the stand in a courtroom decades ago. The child that you saw then still lives in my mother today. Her family consists of a long line of women who, in one way or another, betrayed or abandoned their children. For years, through your wife’s teachings, I believed that my mother was not any different than them. I was wrong. Sir, I have the transcripts from my adoption. You, your wife, my maternal grandmother, and a gaggle of unethical attorneys stole her one hope at a normal life. You stole that hope from young woman who stood on the brink of a breakdown. As a result of yours, and their actions, that young woman has turned into a mentally unstable hypochondriac. She abuses drugs and alcohol, and is void of the social skills necessary to function in life. The irony is that she now resembles the woman that I was forced to call Mom for sixteen years.

I was born to an alcoholic father and mentally unstable mother, and I was stolen by the exact same people. The one difference was age. My parents were still young and possibly, with the proper guidance and support, could have been more than they became, especially my father. You, and your wife through arrogance and selfishness that had been well established in you by then, stole something that did not belong to you. You have always justified your actions by asking things like, “where would you have ended up if we had left you there?” You have tried to convince me that you gave me more than they ever could have. Then your arrogance told you that you were more qualified than they to raise me. Who gave you that right? Sir, you were never able to steal me from the feeling that I did not belong with you. You cannot force a child to love you with guilt, shame and manipulation. Let me solve the mystery of how to “break me” and make me into “one of yours”. The only thing that you ever had to do was respect where I came from, understand that I was different from your children, and most of all love me in spite of where I came from. You, and your family are incapable of these things because your intentions were reprehensible from the very beginning.

I heard from your wife for years that you had “paid enough for me already.” You paid monetarily, but your cost was nothing in comparison to the cost that you created for my father, mother, brother and myself. You stole my soul. I have held inside of me secrets and pain that I will now share with you. It is time for me to empty the garbage that is piled up inside of me, and reclaim my soul. So, sit back and grab a beer or a Bloody Mary and see if you can stomach this information. Please forgive me if I lose a time frame for reference, I cannot always remember my age at the time of the events.

The earliest memory that I can recall was meeting your mother. I was terrified. I felt out of place, confused and as if I were a new toy being shown off. I wanted to run away and go home, if only I could remember where home was. No one cared about or even noticed the pain that I was feeling. It all seemed to swirl around me as if I were having a dream. I cried myself to sleep that night in a room that did not feel like my own. That was the first night of silent tears, and would be followed by many more.

I remember first grade, I was in Mrs. Rhule’s class. I went to school one day with such severe pain in my ear that the sound of her voice and the ringing of the bell cut through my head with a force that made me cry. The teacher asked me if I would like her to call my mother, and I hesitated and then said “yes”. I hesitated because I had informed your wife that morning of the pain in my ear and she told me that I was simply trying to get attention. She then told me to go to school, and that she had better not get a phone call. I was scared for her to call your wife because I knew that she would hit me when I got home. Thankfully your wife was not home when she called. I came home, and said nothing. I simply ate my dinner and then went to my room and fell asleep. When I awaked the next morning, I was in even more pain than the previous day. This time the teacher called right away. I couldn’t hide it from her, the pain was too unbearable and I kept my hand over my ear to muffle the sound. Your wife came to the school while I waited in the nurses’ office. She seemed kind, and concerned while we were in the school. Then when I sat in the passenger seat of the car, I felt a sudden blow to the back of my head that shot searing pain through my ear. I don’t remember what she said, I just remember the pain. When we saw the doctor, he gave us drops for my ear, and I remember him telling your wife that my eardrum almost ruptured. He was an Indian doctor with lollipops in his pocket. I wanted so badly to go home with him. He was so kind and gentle, and seemed to know how much I hurt.

Those drops turned out to be penicillin. It turns out that I am allergic to penicillin. Do you remember? I would guess that you do not, you most likely were not home. Do you remember Veronica Lynn? She knew that I was allergic to penicillin because it had been given to me when I was with her. I wonder if during the theft of her child, if anyone ever bothered to ask those questions. If I had to play that scenario over again with my real mother, I can imagine that she may not have had the money to take me to that nice pediatrician, but I would be willing to bet that she would not have hit me and let him give me penicillin. By the way, I had many ear infections over the years to follow and your wife kept that bottle on penicillin as a reminder for me to not complain about it.

This was just the first of many of these moments yet to come. The neighbors who lived across the street from us took care of me when I had a stomach virus. The school called your wife, and again she was unreachable. This was amazing to me, considering that she never worked a day in my life. I got in trouble again, and shut in my room for two days with only water. She would open the door when you came home, but I knew not to come out and say anything. My woodshop teacher sent me to the nurse when he became aware of my shoes being untied. Do you know why they were untied? My right foot was so swollen and purple from an allergic reaction to a bee sting from the previous day, that I could not tie my shoe. I was yet again, met with a punch to the head. She then told me that she hoped that the doctor would poke me so full of holes that they could use me for a spaghetti strainer.
Each of these incidents, among many others, culminated my senior year of highschool when I was injured during a track meet. Your wife told the coach that I was faking it and not to allow me to pull the wool over his eyes. He listened to her, and my fear of her, and the repercussions of what would happen if I told the truth about my pain forced me to continue running. That injury being left untreated ended my future as a runner. I had been offered a scholarship to a good university after an invitational the month prior to my injury. I never told you about it because, at the time, I thought that I wanted it to be a surprise. Now I realize that it was more a fear of her doing something to ruin it. Isn’t life full of cruel irony?

OK, so that was the easy stuff. Are you warmed up? I have to tell you that, as a child, I thought that your girlfriend at the flying club was very pretty. The bartender was very beautiful also. I know about these women because your wife took me along when she would spy on you. I remember how I hoped that you would leave her for one of those women, so that I would not have to go through this anymore. She told me that you slept in separate bedrooms because you had sex with other women. You see, she used me as her friend when it was convenient for her. I was her thief, her messenger, and her partner in crime. I would do anything that she asked me to in the hopes of winning her love. She would use me for the purpose of being someone to blame it on when she got caught. These were building blocks for one more important mission that took place much later, all of which I took the blame for.

She would have me go through your desk looking for various things. I would find letters to your girlfriends, medications or whatever she was looking for at the time. She would tell me that I could get away with it because if you asked who went through your desk, she would tell you that I did it but she would not let you punish me. It was on one of these little adventures that I found the letter that you wrote to my sister when she was in college. I could not determine what the letter was intended to express at the time, but I was very afraid that you were going to kill yourself. Your wife confirmed that concern by sitting me down and telling me that your father had committed suicide and that your mother had attempted it several times. I became terrified that you were going to die. She told me that she would take care of the letter. I was also told to behave myself and not do anything to upset you. Then the best part of her game was to tell me that if I did not keep her secrets, that you would kill yourself and it would be all my fault. She maintained that control over me for years.

It worked fairly well until one day you beat me so badly that I landed in the guidance office at school the next day. I had bruises all over my face and choke marks on my neck. My teacher sent me to the guidance office and the counselor demanded that I tell him what happened to me. I kept your secret then, but you can have it back now. It was at that moment that I was freed of your psychosis. I wonder if you remember that day. Let me refresh your memory. I dropped a class to take an additional art class. Your wife lied and told you that I had been kicked out of the other class. You asked me to tell you the truth and when I did, you became enraged. You threw me down on the bed and began to strike me. I can still see her standing there with her arms folded appearing pleased with what was happening. You held me by my throat and demanded the truth, I couldn’t speak but even if I was able I would have begged you to listen to me, and to call the school. You were a crazed madman, and just continued to hit me on my face and choke me. I can’t begin to tell you how frightened I was. I did not feel the pain until the next day. My throat hurt too much to even speak, and my right eye was blurry for days. You did not come home for two days. I assume that it was because you could not face what you had done. Well, you can face it now! You tried to create fear in me, and you succeeded. Unfortunately, the fear was only of you. That fear only lasted for a short while. I realized that you knew that it better never happen again because next time I may not keep your secret. I am lucky that your image was more important than your need to inflict physical pain. Emotional pain doesn’t leave marks.

Now may be a good time to let you know that my artistic ability comes from my mother. I doubt that she would have allowed me to be beaten for having been accepted into an advanced placement art class. Oh, that is right, I may not have been able to attend that class had I lived with her, right? Well, let me ask you this, what good did it do me when I was not able to follow my dream to attend college to grow my talent? You and your wife always reminded me that you had “paid enough for me already”. This has always begged the question, how much did you pay for me, and who was it paid to?

Do you remember when your wife broke her wrist punching the freezer door? That isn’t exactly true, unless my head had taken on the shape of a freezer door. That’s right, she broke it punching me in the head. She was always good for hitting me there. I can only assume that it was an act of cowardice. She told me that she was saving me the embarrassment of the truth by lying about how she did it. I told her that it didn’t matter to me because it was her embarrassment, not mine. By this point, I was beginning to have enough of this.

Despite all of this, I still hoped that one day, your family would love me so I tried so hard to fit in. I just couldn’t do it. I continued to give your wife chance after chance. Each time I was met with heartache and disappointment. I was reminded over and over again how much I didn’t belong. I don’t know exactly what it was, it could possibly be the vile names that I was called my entire life. You may remember some of them. Does this list ring a bell? I was a whore, a slut, a tramp, a piece of garbage and my favorite came from each one of you “you were not only a mistake once, you were a mistake twice”.

Well “Dad”, I have saved the best for last. I hope you enjoy hearing it as much as I enjoyed living it. I refused to see your mother when she was dying in the hospital because she was a child molester. Yes, I saw her. She repeatedly molested your nephews. I saw her do it. I informed your wife, and she told me not to tell anyone because you would kill yourself, so I have carried that inside of me for too long. I watched her sleep naked with those young boys. I saw her rubbing their genitals with Vaseline for long periods of time, until the boys began to cry. I know what she did to them, so I can only assume that she did it to you and your brother, as well. That would explain much of your behavior, but it will never excuse it.

When your mother’s boyfriend died, I became concerned when your wife called me and told me that she was acting weird. I asked her what she meant, and she said that she seemed depressed and was talking a lot about the boys being with her forever. She asked me to call the school and inform them of what I had seen and that the boys may be in danger. She told me that it would be a secret between her and I. Well, as you know, that was not the case. She immediately told everyone who made that call. I am telling you now that what I saw and what I know is real. Your mother should have gone to prison for what she had done. She died peacefully in a hospital room and she should have died alone in a cell.

I know that you have suppressed those memories deep in your mind, and I am here to bring them all out for you. I have carried your pain and my own for too long now. I have flashbacks of my life often. They are painful and grasp my heart so forcefully that it takes my breath away. It is time for those memories to grasp your heart and set mine free.

My sons will never know the pain that you and your family has caused me. Your great legacy dies with me. I will raise my sons to be good men and loving fathers. My hopes are that one of them will grow up to be a man that puts people like you, your wife, and your mother behind bars where you belong. I hope that you realize that prison is where you belong, and that you should be thankful everyday for your freedom. Know this, “Dad” true freedom will only come to you when you close your eyes for that last time.

For several years now, I have tried to rationalize what happened to me. I have tried to define who I am and what will heal me. I know that I have to forgive you for what you have done in order for me to begin a new day. Today is not that day. Today is the day where I give you back everything that you gave to me. You live with this pain. You live with this weight and burden in your heart. Today, I give it all to you. I may forgive you tomorrow, I may not.

Today I am standing up to you. I am standing up for my father, my mother, and my brothers and sister. I will never again allow you or your family to affect one more moment in my life. I will survive it every time I look into my son’s eyes and I know that they will never know that pain. I will survive when I see my father in their eyes, and in their smiles. I hope that for your sake, you can accept responsibility for your actions, or lack thereof, and your choices. I challenge you, can you be as big a man as my father was?

This was the story of my life. This was not a random story with no substance and just a moral at the end. I never mailed this letter, but have held it close to my heart like steady pressure on an open wound. I have asked myself many times if this was a form of revenge or one of healing. I have found it to be both. I also have come to the realization that the only way to truly heal is to share this letter not only with who it was intended, but with anyone else who feels that healing is revenge. I am not wielding a weapon, or clenching a fist. I am sharing my life and the process that I have been through in the hopes that more can feel peace. When we carry pain and take inside of ourselves the torment of others, we die inside. I refuse to die, and if this is revenge, then revenge can heal. You decide. I find that revenge is a dish best served heaping and warm. Welcome to dinner.

2009-09-19T10:38:00.001-04:00

A Letter To My Father

Dear Dad,
You will never read this letter for it has been fifteen years since you departed this earth. I have been asked many times, ‘If you had one thing in your life that you could go back and change, what would it be?’ My response comes without hesitation. I would go back to that last moment when our eyes met. Yours were filled with love, and sadness. Mine were filled with anger and resentment. I have your eyes, Dad. I wonder if you ever noticed how much of you lived inside of me.
I ponder so many questions that you held the answers to. I never had the chance to ask. So, I will take the time now to seek those answers. I have three sons now, Dad. The day of each of their births, I looked into their eyes, and I saw you. I wondered if they carried a message from you. I sobbed violently wishing that you were there to see them. I want to know now, when I was born, and you looked into my eyes, what did you see? Were there questions that you wanted to ask me? You didn’t ask, did you? Why?
When my eyes met with my son’s, a love was born that could never be stolen. I made a promise to my son right at that very moment, to never allow what was done to me to be done to him. He is my son, my life, my reason for everything that I do. Dad, you broke your promise. When you left Mom, and allowed your children to be stolen from her, you betrayed me. My life was filled with pain, because you never looked into my eyes and asked the question that every mother and father should ask. “What did I do to deserve this amazing gift, my child?” The answer is in your child’s eyes. It is so clear, if you had bothered to look. The answer was “I love you, Daddy.” You had inside of you a capacity to love beyond yourself.
Dad, I had to look into the eyes of a man who beat me and search for the love that you were supposed to give. I want to know why. What happened to you that robbed you of the ability to love your own child enough to fight? You took those answers with you. I asked those questions a million times in my life, before I knew you. Dad, how was I supposed to ask a lifetime of questions in six months? Why did you deny me those answers? I spent eighteen years dreaming of you, and imagining the love that you had for me. Then finally, the time came for our eyes to meet again.
Suddenly, I felt as though I was reborn. I forgot all of the questions that I wanted to ask. I believed that I would have a lifetime to beg those answers. I was wrong. Your desire to drink consumed and destroyed the love that you had for me. I was so angry with you! I want you to know that it was not just your life that you destroyed, and took for granted, but mine as well. I still feel the anger of that day. I remember your last words to me as if they are an echo in a dark room. Do you remember what you said? “Baby girl, please don’t do with your life, what I have done with mine.” The tears flow like fire just releasing those words now.
I did not understand at that time what you were telling me. I was angry, Dad. You had hurt me so deeply in a way that mere words fail to express. If I had known what was encompassed in that statement, I would have changed my response. “I will never do with my life what you have done with yours. You are drunk, and a waste of life, I will see you again when you are sober.” Those words haunt me. I wish with all of my heart that you had given me the opportunity to try just one more time.
That next night is burned in my memory as if it were made of fire. I remember the call. The sound of a ringing phone has never been the same. What was once just a sound has become a cold dagger through my heart. The voice on the other end said that you were gone. It was so surreal. Time seemed to halt, and all strength left my body. I collapsed when I heard the final words, “he killed himself, it is all over, he is gone.” Do you know what happened in that moment? Another question was born. Why?
It has been fifteen years since you left me. I think of you everyday, I love you deeper, and with more of my heart with every passing minute. You see Dad, with the passing of time, you have given me the greatest gift that a father could give. You gave your life for me. I was too young, and too naïve to realize it. Your words have forever altered my path. I never needed the answers, they were there all along. Your life, your choices, and your mistakes have been my map. You have been my guide in death more than you ever could have been in life.
It is ironic that now, the only regret that I have is not the unanswered questions, but the one time that you asked and I responded. I want you to know that I am sorry for what I said. I want you to know what my answer would have been if time really had stood still. “Dad, I love you. I will hold you in my heart, and let you go so that your pain can end and my life can begin.” I forgive you Dad, and I beg your forgiveness. When the sun rises again, and it reflects in my son’s eyes, I will see your forgiveness. Then I can forgive myself.
You have taught me so much when you gave your life away. You have taught me the power of words. You have shown me the importance of loving to the fullest every day, for you never know when the phone will ring. I have seen more in my sons because you made me search. Most importantly, you have broken me down to the basics of human components, and forced me to rebuild. I have done it, Dad. You would be proud. I have not done with my life, what you had done with yours. There is one thing that I will do just like you. I will share my words with others. I will share my pain, in the hopes that others will learn.
Your message lives on in me. Your life had value, not only to me, but to anyone who can’t find their path. The only thing that they need to know lies within the source of their pain. It lies within their hearts, and is carried through their words. I honor your life, and your death by passing your message to all who will listen.
“Don’t do with your life, what he did with his.” Remember to love others before yourself. Know that there is great power in your words, they can be tools of healing or of destruction. Always let the ones you love feel what you do for them. Most importantly, look into your children’s eyes, and ask “What did I do to deserve your love, my child?” If you live up to what that child asks of you, you will not make the mistakes of my father.
I give these words in your memory, Dad. I love you, I miss you, and I forgive you.

Love always,
Your baby girl

2009-09-18T21:00:00.000-04:00

Mr. Mccain,

I am writing you this letter to inform you of my decision to vote for Senator Obama. As americans, we are conditioned to be skeptical of anything that a career politician says, yet we will be the first to question the experience of a newcomer. I, like many other Americans, questioned Senator Obama's experience and ability to lead our country at a time when our leadership is so important. Mr. Mccain, I am a registered democrat, but I have never voted party line, until now.

Mr. Mccain, you have shown powerful leadership in the past several months. Your leadership has split this country right down the middle. You have led us away from unity, and toward division. That, sir, is not what I look for in a leader. Your choice of Mrs. Palin as your running mate is a slap in the face to every American, even those who don't realize it. Those who have lived in this country through poverty, natural disaster, terrorist attack, racism, inequality, war, financial ruin, and betrayal at the hands of their president expect...no, demand...a leader who puts the country's needs before their own. Sarah Palin was nothing short of a display of your own greed and desire to win an election over the need for this country to have competent and sure leadership.

Do you remember the unity that this country experienced after 9/11? I do. Now, I see you taking what was once a unifying disaster, and turning it into a tool to destroy your opponent and invoke fear in your country. Your campaign has consisted of little substance regarding what you will do for the American people, and has focused on personal attacks on Senator Obama. I see now, in the wake of the most repulsive campaign in American history, even your trophy running mate has abandoned ship. I am going to give you, and your party some words of advice. The next time you make the fatal error of thinking that you can control, or silence a strong-minded woman, I suggest that you pick an intelligent woman. That way, when you can not control her, she is at least smart enough to help the campaign, not hurt it. Your underestimation of the power and drive of the American woman has been the golden key to your undoing.

You may have been an honorable man once, but I doubt it. The character of a person is tested in extreme circumstances. You, Mr. Mccain, are no war hero. The heroes never came home. You are a POW survivor, and you dishonor the men who did not come home with your egocentricity. The strain and pressure of this election has brought out the true colors in you. You are an embarrassment to your country, and your return to the senate in defeat can not come soon enough.

Senator Obama has handled your crude attacks with elegance and grace. He has shown me that his strength of character is exactly what this country needs right now. Senator Obama has not won this election, but if you lose, it will be at your own hand. Sleep well, Mr. Mccain, because 24 hours from now, you will reap the seeds that you have sown. I just hope that the American people can unite again in the wake of the storm that you have left behind.

Nature's Playset

2009-09-13T12:13:00.000-04:00

I just returned home from having a nice dinner. We had planned to go see a movie, but decided to grab a coffee and drive around the local park instead.

It was beautiful. The weather here is clear and cool, and the stars were clearly visible. As we drove through the wooded silence of nature, the bright yellow lines on the road and the glaring road signs seemed to invade the sanctity of the trees. As the lights streamed across the strong and sturdy trunks of the trees, I felt as though we were merely guests in this place.

We came accross three white tailed deer, one buck and two does. They stood just a few feet from the road, posing in their majestic form. They seemed cautious of us, but unafraid. They are one of the few animals in my area that we, as humans, have regular access to, yet have never found a way of domesticating nor exploiting them. The only exception is the hunters who aid in thinning their numbers. I have always thought that people are what is overpopulated, not the deer. But for some reason, there is not a license or designated time of year for killing them. Go figure.

I became lost in the beauty of nature, and had completely forgotten about people, and then there was an obnoxious "play area" that disrupted the natural setting. I looked around at the trees and the undergrowth, the animals and the stars...and I thought....why do we need this stupid playset?

When I was a kid, the woods were my sanctuary. I would go there to forget the chaos of being a "person". I remember falling asleep on the springy moss that looked like little evergreen trees. There was one log that was rotted out in the center, and I would curl up in there and just listen to the sounds of the leaves rattling in the breeze, and the sounds of birds communicating with each other..and the occasional rustling of a woodland creature tromping past. I would gather every single seed, berry, pod... or whatever I could find... and see what it was, and where it came from. What was it's purpose here? Caterpillars in the fall were a wonderful find. They seemed willing enough to play with me, and never ran away. LOL. The trees were my jungle gym, wild grapevines were my swing, and a slippery moss covered slope after a hard rain was my slide. There was no chainlinnk fence to keep me "safe". I knew my boundaries because I knew better than to go where I was not allowed. I did not have a convenient little travel size water bottle with a strap and a squirt nozzle. My hand sanitizer was creek water and the leg of my pants. Trail mix was composed of whatever berries and seeds I could find, and taste. I don't think I should have eaten some of them! hahaha I didn't need a baseball bat, and a ball with a logo on it, just a fallen branch and the trunk of a tree. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't break that branch. So, then it was time to see how far I could hit a black walnut with the fallen branch that seemed indestructable. Then it would break. Geeeesh, just when I was about to hit a homerun.

I looked at this play area, and I noticed that the ground all around the playset was a springy rubber material. HA! The only padding with any spring in it, when I was a kid...was your ass. I don't know about you, but I was never severely injured from a tragic butt injury coming off of a swing....but now, they are REALLY safe from THAT potential disaster. *eye roll*

The colors of the play area were garish and offensive. Bilious reds, yellows, and oranges screamed "LOOK AT ME!" I wondered how these children could possibly see the beauty of what surrounded them, in light of what was clearly designed to capture their attention. How could the subtle tones of green possible draw them to leave their structured playtime, and beg to explore the wonder of nature? Well, I guess that it can't. After all, how can mom keep an eye on them while texting on the phone and chatting with her friend, whose child you MUST play with, if they are off exploring the world around them? Besides, they only have an hour to "play" and then, it is time to pile in the minivan and head off to soccer practice or music lessons, or dance class, or bible study, or mom's hair and nail appointment, their weekly therapy session, and mom has to squeeze in a trip to the pharmacy to pick up her hormone supplements and their Ritalin.

Time is a wastin', folks....so much to do, and so little time.

I don't now what I am bitching about, they can learn about nature by simply Googling it.....

I am not kidding. They do it.

or there wouldn't be this.... Nature via Google

I DEFINITELY learned more from the woods than I could ever learn from a machine...but times are changing, and I just sound like a bitter old woman.

bad news, I am only 35.

WTF?

2009-09-13T11:32:00.000-04:00

How do we adopt these stupid sayings that actually contradict each other????

Such as...

"birds of a feather stick together"

and

"opposites attract"

Then there is...

"an eye for an eye"

and

"do unto others as you would have others do unto you"

*ok, I know where those two come from..hhahah*

this cracks me up....

"NO Trespassing" <----THAT nailed to a tree

and this on the doormat...

"Welcome to my home"

MAKE UP YOUR DAMN MIND ALREADY!

This one..

"he sees the world through rose colored glasses"

and this...

"he has such a chip on his shoulder"

wtf does either of those mean????......geeeesh. Other than Elton John...who the hell wears rose colored glasses..and how does that make anything look better??? What the f*** is a "chip"???? How idiotic!

"you can't judge a book by it's cover"

and

"If it walks like a duck, and quacks like a duck, chances are..it is a duck!"

hahahha

maybe the duck had a bear book cover on it!

"the greatest things in life are free"

and this...

"there is no such thing as a free lunch"

looks like we are fucked. Just sayin...

"if you put the shoe on the other foot...."

and this...

"not until you have walked a mile in his shoes...."

but the big question is...which foot do I put HIS shoe on???

"don't look a gifthorse in the mouth"

and this...

"if it seems too good to be true, it most likely is"

um....what if it is a REALLY nice looking gift and the horse is friendly?

"don't kill the messenger"

and this...

"beware the bearer of bad news."

"only the good die young"

and this...

"respect your elders"

"what goes up, must come down"

and

"reach for the stars"

um...cuz eventually you will be the highlight on "one hit wonders".

"the sky is the limit"

and

"keep your feet on the ground"

wtf???

"take it one day at a time"

and

"plan for the future"

"The good of the many outweigh the good of the few"

and

"No child left behind"

um...I guess our government never watched Star Trek. hahaha

"outer beauty fades, inner ugly is forever"

and this....

"it is what's INSIDE that counts"

um...uh oh.

"we must not repeat the mistakes of our past"

and

"We The People....blah blah blah"

hahahhah...that'll piss off the righties...giggle

"If you die in your nightmare, then you are really dead."

and this..

"at least he died peacefully and in his sleep."

oh holy shit!

"all men are created equal"

and this....

"behind every great man there is a strong woman"

and this....

"what's good for the goose is good for the gander"

makes my head spin.

"the color of money makes the world go round"

and this...

"WE ARE GOING GREEN!"

anyone see a connection? giggle

"let a sleeping dog lie"

and this...

"fight the good fight"

I think in order to do that, you may have to wake up the freakin dog.

speaking of which...what the hell is with our obsession with animal analogies???

"reflexes of a cat"
"swims like a fish"
"climbs like a monkey"
"the heart of a lion"
"protective like a mother hen"
"hungry as a bear"

and yet...we call ourselves "superior" to those we emulate...and pretty poorly at that.

just a thought.